# Springtime wedding for Mary Kay and Vili **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 14, 2005, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094 "2005-02-14T22:53:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2005, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/1 "2005-02-14T22:53:59Z")
I thought about resurrecting this old thread, [Mary Kay Letourneau, the school teacher of our boyhood dreams, on the streets again](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=269779&highlight=Mary+Letourneau) but it was in MPSIMS, and while I don’t have a vitroil it needs, let’s just start in the pit to save time. [CNN has a new article on the adventures of Mary Kay and Vili](http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/02/14/teacher.sex.ap/index.html). So far it appears the entire article on their upcoming nuptials is based on quotes from “a friend” and a department store gift registry. And we all know how secure those things are, :rolleyes:. However, if it’s true…Good Lord woman, isn’t that boy messed up enough for you yet? ---
**Author:** ![GaWd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f08c70/32.png) [@GaWd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaWd)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2005, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/2 "2005-02-14T23:01:48Z")
I don’t see a reason to get all riled up about this. While what she did ages ago was illegal and immoral in most people’s eyes\*\*, after all of these years they’re determined to be together. That’s more than I can say about a lot of people who met and got married as consenting adults these days. Sam \*\*- before someone jumps in here accusing me of condoning MKL’s actions as a schoolteacher and getting involved with a very underage student, I do not condone it. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2005, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/3 "2005-02-14T23:03:09Z")
I just have one thing to say: Eeeeeewwww ---
**Author:** ![The\_27th\_Evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ebca7d/32.png) [@The\_27th\_Evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_27th_Evil)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2005, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/4 "2005-02-14T23:11:59Z")
Here is [the registry itself](http://wedding.weddingchannel.com/search_purchase/guest_view_store_ga.asp?retailer_registry_uid=301986711&listby=dept) . Taking it away from the ick factor into domestic commentary, her china pattern is too neon-candy for me, but I like the Kate Spade drinking glasses. It’s still creepy, though. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Zagna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d2c977/32.png) [@El\_Zagna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Zagna)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/5 "2005-02-15T01:34:45Z")
What makes you think Vili is so messed up? And why all the eeewww stuff. I assume each finds the other attractive and good company, so why should we care. Heck I’m happy for them, and wish them well. ---
**Author:** ![Good\_Egg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Good\_Egg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Good_Egg)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/6 "2005-02-15T01:47:28Z")
The sad part is one of her sons from her first marriage said he wouldn’t speak to her again if she married this guy. I think I heard this on tv. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/7 "2005-02-15T01:49:00Z")
I have had opportunity to see some of Ms. Letourneau’s commitment records (confidentiality precludes explaining where or how), and let me state this categorically and unambiguously so there is no possibility of being misinterpreted: **She is batshit crazy.** I know nothing about the kid. His feelings might be genuine. But Mary Kay is hell and gone insane. This ain’t a romantic forbidden love, and don’t fool yourself that it is. It is, of course, none of my business what they choose to do. It’s their life. But the fact is, she’s a nut. And those plates are uuuuuuu-ugly. ---
**Author:** ![butter\_pie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aca169/32.png) [@butter\_pie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butter_pie)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/8 "2005-02-15T01:51:33Z")
Don’t they have at least one (two I think?) kids together? What’s wrong with the guy wanting to at least try to raise his kids with their mom? What she did was wrong, but at this point it can’t be undone… I fail to see the harm in all parties involved trying to make the best of it and have some sort of a normal life (as much as they can, anyway.) If they want to be together, he’s 22 now, he should be able to make that decision. Anyway, you have no idea knowing what’s going on his head or how messed up he is. In the long run he may be better off with than without her. Hard to say from just reading a news article. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/9 "2005-02-15T02:06:24Z")
I can understand that they’re of age now, and all, but why would he want to be with someone who would cheat on her husband while a school kid? Who would be so unethical as to sleep with her students? ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/10 "2005-02-15T03:09:41Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > I have had opportunity to see some of Ms. Letourneau’s commitment records (confidentiality precludes explaining where or how), and let me state this categorically and unambiguously so there is no possibility of being misinterpreted: > > **She is batshit crazy.** > > I know nothing about the kid. His feelings might be genuine. But Mary Kay is hell and gone insane. This ain’t a romantic forbidden love, and don’t fool yourself that it is. > > It is, of course, none of my business what they choose to do. It’s their life. But the fact is, she’s a nut. > And those plates are uuuuuuu-ugly. Is **Crazy as Batshit** an official physchiatric diagnosis? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/11 "2005-02-15T03:41:35Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > I have had opportunity to see some of Ms. Letourneau’s commitment records (confidentiality precludes explaining where or how), and let me state this categorically and unambiguously so there is no possibility of being misinterpreted: > > **She is batshit crazy.** Until recently, I’ve been in the “They love each other so let them be happy” camp. However, shortly after she was released and before the judge ruled they could see each other, I happened to be standing in line at the local neighborhood Wal-Mart and as the line was long and I was bored I picked up a tabloid to look through while I waited. Inside there were photocopies of letters said to be in her own handwriting and written from prison in which she does indeed appear to be “batshit crazy.” She had apparently gotten wind that Vili was seeing girls his own age and she was seething with rage. She said she knew he had needs but that he had better be jacking off instead of seeing anyone else. And then she threatened to have a “big, crazy black female inmate” she knew cut off his dick if he kept seeing other girls. There was quite a bit more and it was mostly along this same line and very much over the top. The letters were photocopies and said to be in her own handwriting. I would imagine that if they were fake it would have been an almost automatic lawsuit victory so it appeared that they were genuine. But on the other hand, I haven’t heard a peep about them since then, and I would think that if they were genuine it would be all over the news. But, if the letters I saw were genuine, I would indeed say she’s batshit crazy…and I would worry that some day she would harm him or that he would wind up harming her either out of self-defense or in attempt to get free from her. ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/12 "2005-02-15T04:18:48Z")
**Cervaise** , I don’t recall that Ms. Letourneau was committed. I thought that she was found guilty and sentenced to prison. If she has also been committed to a mental institution, her papers would not indicate that she was “insane.” If you were in a position to see her mental health records and have violated her confidentiality, then you are A-1 _pond scum_ and are in violation of the law. ---
**Author:** ![kung\_fu\_lola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f4b2a3/32.png) [@kung\_fu\_lola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kung_fu_lola)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/13 "2005-02-15T04:21:53Z")
I’m with **GaWd**. Maybe they were just meant for each other. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/14 "2005-02-15T05:06:23Z")
Are they having some kind of big fancy wedding now? That registry was tacky in the extreme. ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/15 "2005-02-15T05:18:34Z")
**Starving Artist** , according to several news sources at the time, she was diagnosed with hypomania, which is a mild to moderate form of bi-polar disorder. It is not a psychosis. Are you _sure_ you just read that while standing in line? (wink, wink)? Now that they are both of age, what they do is not my business. But it really bothers me that there is a disparity in general in the sentences given to female offenders and male offenders – especially if the male student is in high school. The female teacher is then sometimes treated as if she has rendered some sort of service by introducing the young man to the pleasures of the flesh. Meanwhile, the male teacher would get a stiff (snort) sentence. All of this brings to mind one time when I really did go _batshit crazy_ and one of my students that had a crush on me showed up at the hospital and stared at me through the window at the end of the corridor. I kept telling myself, _This is not happening. He is not really there. You’ve gone off the deep end. It’s a reaction to your meds. You have slipped the surly bonds of earth._ Yada Yada. But one of the nurses noticed him and went to check on him and the doctor told me about it later. During that same “sojourn” at the funny spa, my substitute teacher called and wanted to know what to do about the discipline problems in my fifth period class. The principal had given her the number for the ward in the hospital. I digress. But I’ve earned the right just this time. ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/16 "2005-02-15T05:29:08Z")
Philistines. That china is _fabulous_. I love loud, colorful pottery, though. It would be better if it were hand-thrown, though, instead of mass produced (slipcast). (I’m a slipcast snob.) As far as the “forbidden love” angle goes, it’s kind of scary, sad and strange, but he’s of age now, so I wish them the best. I hope that they have a decent life together, for his sake and his kids’ sake. She seems like a total loon, but maybe she’ll straighten out her act. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/17 "2005-02-15T06:00:12Z")
Well, what’s the alternate? They marry other people and now there are _four_ screwed-up individuals involved? In the simple interest of minimizing emotional wreckage, I wish them many happy returns. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/18 "2005-02-15T06:00:47Z")
> [@jinwicked](#): > > Don’t they have at least one (two I think?) kids together? What’s wrong with the guy wanting to at least try to raise his kids with their mom? What she did was wrong, but at this point it can’t be undone… I fail to see the harm in all parties involved trying to make the best of it and have some sort of a normal life (as much as they can, anyway.) If they want to be together, he’s 22 now, he should be able to make that decision. > > Anyway, you have no idea knowing what’s going on his head or how messed up he is. In the long run he may be better off with than without her. Hard to say from just reading a news article. My brain knows you are right, and she’s done her time and deserves to live her life in decent obscurity. It’s just my gut is having a fit, as well as the EWU!!! reaction of somebody having sex with a child. Maybe Villi is not messed up. It’s possible. IIRC from previous news articles when she was released, he’d dropped out of school and was unable to hold a job. He sounded messed up, but it’s possible he would have been messed up even without being messed with. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/19 "2005-02-15T06:00:53Z")
> [@Zoe](#): > > **Starving Artist** , according to several news sources at the time, she was diagnosed with hypomania, which is a mild to moderate form of bi-polar disorder. It is not a psychosis. Thank you for pointing out the difference as I was unaware of it. Still though, if I were involved with a woman and found out she had written letters like this I’d be trying to learn how to sleep with one eye open. > [@Zoe](#): > > Are you _sure_ you just read that while standing in line? (wink, wink)? No, really! I swear I was only standing in line…I _swear_ it. 😉 > [@Zoe](#): > > Now that they are both of age, what they do is not my business. But it really bothers me that there is a disparity in general in the sentences given to female offenders and male offenders – especially if the male student is in high school. The female teacher is then sometimes treated as if she has rendered some sort of service by introducing the young man to the pleasures of the flesh. Meanwhile, the male teacher would get a stiff (snort) sentence. I agree completely. But it just seems part of the human condition that men are considered predatory when it comes to illicit sex while women are regarded as being driven by more by some sort of neediness or mental disorder. I suppose it’s because part of the purpose of law is to act as a deterrant, and giving men a pass on sex with teenagers would result in a stampede, whereas women in general would not be inclined to take advantage of it unless they had something troubling them. So perhaps the laws are harsher (or should I say “more harsh,” Madame Teacher? 😉 ) when it comes to men because men present the greater danger. > [@Zoe](#): > > All of this brings to mind one time when I really did go _batshit crazy_ and one of my students that had a crush on me showed up at the hospital and stared at me through the window at the end of the corridor. I kept telling myself, _This is not happening. He is not really there. You’ve gone off the deep end. It’s a reaction to your meds. You have slipped the surly bonds of earth._ Yada Yada. But one of the nurses noticed him and went to check on him and the doctor told me about it later. Poor kid. I remember a couple of teachers I had a crush on. It’s frustrating because you know you’re just a kid to your teacher (or at least that’s what I thought at the time. 😉 ) The one I had the biggest crush on had a cute speech impediment. She couldn’t pronounce aluminum or esophagus. She’d always say “alunimun” or “esogaphus.” I bet if I was one of your students I’d have had a crush on you, too. (wink, wink) ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2005, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094/20 "2005-02-15T06:03:57Z")
> [@yosemite](#): > > Philistines. That china is _fabulous_. I love loud, colorful pottery, though. It would be better if it were hand-thrown, though, instead of mass produced (slipcast). (I’m a slipcast snob.). I’m with you. I like loud and colorful, too. (After all, I’m the guy who likes LeRoy Neiman…remember?) BTW, did you get the email I sent you last night regarding the quick-draw artist? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/springtime-wedding-for-mary-kay-and-vili/290094.md?page=2)