# Squirrel Fun **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 5, 2024, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835 "2024-09-05T22:05:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/21 "2024-09-07T00:45:33Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > EEK! Let’s have no squirrel abuse in my thread! And don’t tell me it’s fun for the squirrel. 😠 They kept coming back and lining up for another flight. They’re smart enough to know what they think is fun & what’s not by their standards. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/22 "2024-09-07T00:59:14Z")
They must be boys. 🙄 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/23 "2024-09-07T01:19:10Z")
Like I said they are a scatterbrained and silly lot. They may never comes back to mess with your thingy. Or they might eat 6 in a row. Don’t worry unless they take up residence in yours. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/24 "2024-09-07T01:21:39Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Years ago before I moved in with my gf, I had a bird feeder torn apart it hung on a shepherd’s crook that was badly bent. > > My son was ~10 at the time. He was helping me attempt to fix the damage. He pointed out that if the two of us were struggling to straighten the pole, surely a raccoon couldn’t be responsible. The next day I saw a black bear in my yard. On one camping trip we had bears visit our campsite on multiple occasions. We had taken the standard precaution of hanging a bundle of food from a line strung between two trees as protection against forest creatures… Canned goods we just left on the ground… We weren’t expecting bears, but we figured not even bears could break open cans. We were wrong. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/25 "2024-09-07T01:48:42Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > They must be boys. 🙄 As you’ve doubtless noticed, gravity affects critters like us of 120-300 lbs. rather differently than it affects small lightly-constructed 8oz squirrels or even smaller critters. Falling 20 feet out of a tree is fun to them and an ambulance ride to us (at best). Physics is weird that way. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/26 "2024-09-07T01:59:58Z")
> [@deltogre](#): > > My canoe is filled with walnut husks At least it’s not filled with eels. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/27 "2024-09-07T02:40:08Z")
Especially not ass-eels. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sylvanz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Sylvanz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sylvanz)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/28 "2024-09-07T03:25:18Z")
On another message board, there was a guy who was a writer. He wrote the most hilarious account about his really eventful interaction with a squirrel. That mb is defunct now, but I literally laughed until I had tears. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/29 "2024-09-07T04:57:41Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#): > > > [@deltogre](#): > > > > My canoe is filled with walnut husks > > At least it’s not filled with eels. It’s a canoe, not a hovercraft ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/30 "2024-09-07T11:12:15Z")
Drat you, Gravity! \<_shakes fist_\> ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/31 "2024-09-07T11:43:32Z")
Occasionally I would come home to a little pile of leaves, flower petals and things on my deck. I wondered why my wife did that. But I assumed she was just ‘doodling’ but with real objects. Turned out to be a pack rat. ---
**Author:** ![Die\_Capacitrix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/die_capacitrix/32/9_2.png) [@Die\_Capacitrix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Die_Capacitrix)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/32 "2024-09-07T14:56:47Z")
> [@Sylvanz](#): > > That mb is defunct now, but I literally laughed until I had tears. Was this Brad from Georgia (snopes)? I really miss his humor. ---
**Author:** ![Sylvanz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Sylvanz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sylvanz)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/33 "2024-09-07T17:00:23Z")
Yes, he was so funny. That squirrel story is classic; I don’t even remember any details. ---
**Author:** ![Paintcharge](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/paintcharge/32/7946_2.png) [@Paintcharge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paintcharge)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/34 "2024-09-07T21:46:49Z")
I expect most of you have heard this, but I present [Squirrel Cop.](https://www.thisamericanlife.org/115/first-day/act-two-0) ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/35 "2024-09-07T22:38:45Z")
Since we dove into Squirrel tales(heh). Mine: I haz the squirrels. They mostly leave the bird feeders and various things alone in the yard. Ignore the pets and kids. They know they’re in a safe place. I have nut trees so this is the big draw. I’m sure there’s a squirrely sized neon sign in the deep woods that says: _Becks r nuts, come one come all!_ These squirrels flip around my deck. Running the rail. Chattering at the pets. Throwing pecan shells right where my bare feet step. Of course any toast scraps, crumbs and cereal leavings get put on the rail for them. It’s a grand-kid project (yeah, I started it). I’ve made friends with a few. To the point they’d take food from my fingers. No petting. Just nervous snatch and run. A couple springs ago, there were baby squirrels everywhere. Young and trusting one baby would actually sit on my knees. Take a nibble or two before skedaddling. He seemed alone, altho’ still fairly young. I missed him a few days. I was out one morning and he came hopped on my knee. I had some crackers. He took a piece but didn’t eat it. Then, surprisingly curled up and went to sleep on my knee. I noticed his mouth was opened. He was kinda snoring. I tried to look in, thinking something was stuck. No luck. I decided he was sick. Eventually he hopped off. I had a small cat carrier by me the next morning. Yeah. You know my intention. So did he. 3 days go by. I’m thinking, well he’s dead. Then there he was. He couldn’t really hop anymore. His mouth was constantly open. Thinner. Yep. If at all possible he had a vet trip in his future. He came near me and just sat. I put a few bird seeds by him. Nope. Not interested. He had a big bump on his head. Between his eyes. I slowly reached down. In one smooth move he in was in the carrier. I put a towel over it. Called the vet and took him there. He didn’t have any fight left. They just took him out. Barely flicked his tail. Vet looked. Said he knew what it was. The heck you say? Gave him a tiny shot. The squirrel closed his eyes. Before I could say “why you kill him, what he do to you?” The vet had long tweezers and pulled the nastiest, biggest, slimiest wolf fly larva out of the tiny squirrels left nostril. I swear, it was a good inch long and fat as a cheap jelly bean. I nearly fainted. I know I screamed. They looked the squirrel over for more. Gave him a shot or three. Laughing their asses off at me. Laughing cause it cost about $200, Yep, ol’ Beck made another boat payment for the vet. Got hoodwinked by a furry being that might have weighed 3 oz. I felt good, I saved him. Patted myself on the back for my wild animal altruistic act and relished the thought of my good karma coming. Got home thinking of all the good times me and my new friend Flip the squirrel would have. He was awake. I had heard him in the car. Took him to the deck and opened the carrier. He hopped out and fell over dead. At least he got a …well, he got nothing! He may have died in the woods. But I killed him, as surely as if I had drowned him. The stress of all my altruism killed him. At least that wolf fly is dead. See, there’s good in all things. If you convince yourself of it. It kinda worked. 😑 ---
**Author:** ![Sylvanz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Sylvanz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sylvanz)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/36 "2024-09-07T23:05:35Z")
Aww, you gave it a try. He was dying in a pretty awful way anyway. At least he got that thing out of his nose. You know if you could have caught him sooner, he may have made it. You did all you could under the circumstances. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2024, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/37 "2024-09-07T23:55:33Z")
Don’t Google botfly, wolf fly or their larva. You won’t be able to eat your dinner. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2024, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/38 "2024-09-08T00:59:18Z")
Okay. No more dying squirrels, or catapulting squirrels, or squirrels coming to or potentially coming to harm. This is a squirrel-friendly thread. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2024, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/39 "2024-09-08T01:14:48Z")
Hey, I went well ($) beyond my obligation to be squirrel friendly. I get it you want a nice, feelsy thread. So I won’t tell the story of the Squirrel family that lived in a knot in a red oak tree in my yard. It’s kinda exciting, but ended badly. Or the squirrel that took a flying leap into my pond. Without his swimmies on. Or the one who used to run up and down the electrical line to my house. He hung around awhile. I’ll shut up now. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2024, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835/40 "2024-09-08T02:00:55Z")
👉🏼 😑 👈🏼 _La la la la…_ (Fingers in ears) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/squirrel-fun/1006835.md?page=3)