# Star Trek Funerals **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 8, 2007, 9:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274 "2007-12-08T09:10:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 9:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/1 "2007-12-08T09:10:08Z")
[To boldly uber-dork where no one has uber-dorked before.](http://www.eternalimage.net/st_page.html) > [@](#): > > For the millions of fans on our planet and beyond, our new line of STAR TREK urns, caskets, monuments and vaults will be an important discovery indeed. After ten movies and five television series, phrases like “Live long and prosper,” “Resistance is futile” and “Space: the final frontier” have become part of our global vocabulary. > > Monuments and vaults will also debut next year. The Eternal Image STAR TREK line is licensed for sale in the United States, Canada, Europe, Australia, New Zealand, Russia, Korea and Japan. > > The first two products to debut will be the STAR TREK urns and caskets. “Get a life” doesn’t really seem to fit here, perhaps, “Get a death!”? (I’m also curious about this whole “beyond” business? Do they expect the Thermians to show up? Or dead Trekkies in the after life to say, “Damn it! I wish I’d be buried in one of those.”) ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 10:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/2 "2007-12-08T10:30:02Z")
Hey, as long as Kirstie Alley sheds a tear, my soul will be satisfied. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/3 "2007-12-08T10:34:08Z")
[QUOTE=Bryan Ekers] Hey, as long as Kirstie Alley sheds a tear, my soul will be satisfied. [/QUOTE] You could just show her pictures of a DC-9 and get the same reaction for a lot less money. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 11:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/4 "2007-12-08T11:28:05Z")
Maybe if they came with an authentic Scottish bagpiper playing “Amazing Grace”? ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/5 "2007-12-08T11:34:13Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] You could just show her pictures of a DC-9 and get the same reaction for a lot less money. [/QUOTE] OK, I admit to being whooshed. What’s the connection between a DC-9 and Kirstie Alley? Besides being comparable in size, that is? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/6 "2007-12-08T11:39:00Z")
[QUOTE=cochrane] OK, I admit to being whooshed. What’s the connection between a DC-9 and Kirstie Alley? Besides being comparable in size, that is? [/QUOTE] She’s a Scientologist, and if you’ve seen the _Tom Cruise Won’t Come Out of the Closet_ episode of _South Park_, you’ll know why DC-9s make her cry. She has, IIRC, lost weight. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/7 "2007-12-08T12:03:59Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] She’s a Scientologist, and if you’ve seen the _Tom Cruise Won’t Come Out of the Closet_ episode of _South Park_, you’ll know why DC-9s make her cry. She has, IIRC, lost weight. [/QUOTE] OK, I had to read the transcript to get it. I do now, although I still wouldn’t have immediately gotten the connection. Minor nitpick, the script says “DC-8’s”. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/8 "2007-12-08T14:29:57Z")
Actually, the urn looks rather classy. ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/9 "2007-12-08T14:38:21Z")
They’re much nicer than those god-awful Precious Moments and MLB urns. I was most interested in the Vatican Library line, until I realized it wasn’t [this](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a1_074.html) library they were talking about. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/10 "2007-12-08T14:39:02Z")
The “beyond” business – the Star Trek broadcasts have been propagating into the universe for decades, so we can be sure there are many alien species who’ve become Trekkies. Hell, the chance to buy a Star Trek Urn might finally push some of them into coming here. Or maybe they already are here. I have a hard time imagining that all those freaks who attend the conventions are really human. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/11 "2007-12-08T15:37:12Z")
I had previously wanted an ecological burial with my carbon sequestered in the deep sea. If my enemies had their way it would likely have been decapitated, staked, burned and buried at a crossroad. However, now that I know about Star Trek caskets, all bets are off. How much to shoot my body onto the Genesis planet? Next: The search for Attack from the 3rd Dimension ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/12 "2007-12-08T19:37:26Z")
I have to agree with Bosda; while it’s too modern for my personal decor, I think the urn is quite pretty. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/13 "2007-12-08T19:50:18Z")
Am I the first one to point out that this is simply spreading something that was pioneered for [sports fans](http://www.boston.com/sports/baseball/articles/2006/10/18/dying_for_a_title_company_making_team_pride_urns_caskets/)? I still think it’s silly, but if that’s the image you want with you final remains, that’s your choice. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/14 "2007-12-08T20:00:48Z")
Are you forgetting the KISS Kasket, **OtakuLoki**? I’m a former Trekkie but even at the height of my obsession, I’d’ve never been purchased either of those but more power to those that do. Their money and their remains. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2007, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/15 "2007-12-08T20:22:53Z")
[QUOTE=Aesiron] Are you forgetting the KISS Kasket, **OtakuLoki**? [/QUOTE] No, for me to have forgotten it, I’d have had to seen it in the first place. Generally I tend to tune out for any mention of Kiss. **Now** I’ll have to forget it. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![cerberus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@cerberus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cerberus)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/16 "2007-12-09T00:47:52Z")
The urn reminds me of the killer ball thingies from _Phantasm_ - now that would be a rather interesting funeral brand. Branding based on Star Trek is arguably no more idiotic than branding by sports program or university affiliation. Now, brand by Beverage - that would be funny. How about a Coca Cola Casket, or a CokeCasket for short? ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/17 "2007-12-09T02:59:20Z")
I think cigarette branded caskets would be interesting. Would RJ Reynolds endorse these for the name recognition, or condemn them for the association with death? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/18 "2007-12-09T03:15:14Z")
[QUOTE=Boyo Jim] I think cigarette branded caskets would be interesting. Would RJ Reynolds endorse these for the name recognition, or condemn them for the association with death? [/QUOTE] Ages ago, _Mad_ magazine had a phony ad for such a thing. Googling doesn’t turn up anything useful as far as that ad goes, but it looks like [you could get these guys to make one for you.](http://blogs.usatoday.com/ondeadline/2007/02/british_firm_co.html) > [@](#): > > Instead of thinking up a witty way to begin this posting, we figured we would start out with the subject’s URL: [www.crazycoffins.co.uk](http://www.crazycoffins.co.uk). (Warning: The site is confusing.) > > Yes, you read that right. Crazy Coffins. That’s how British undertaker Vic Fearns and Co. describes its bespoke body boxes. BBC says the company has been in business since 1886, and started creating customized caskets in the 1990s with a coffin shaped like a WWII fighter plane. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/19 "2007-12-09T03:41:15Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] Ages ago, _Mad_ magazine had a phony ad for such a thing. Googling doesn’t turn up anything useful as far as that ad goes, but it looks like [you could get these guys to make one for you.](http://blogs.usatoday.com/ondeadline/2007/02/british_firm_co.html) [/QUOTE] No need to import. [Buy American.](http://www.artcaskets.com/codepages/about.html) ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274/20 "2007-12-09T04:14:43Z")
[QUOTE=OtakuLoki] No, for me to have forgotten it, I’d have had to seen it in the first place. Generally I tend to tune out for any mention of Kiss. **Now** I’ll have to forget it. 😉 [/QUOTE] Unfortunately, the [KISS Kasket](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kiss_Kasket) has been discontinued. > [@cochrane](#): > > Minor nitpick, the script says “DC-8’s”. Yes- L. Ron Hubbard believed Xenu’s airplanes looked like Douglas DC-8s. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-trek-funerals/429274.md?page=2)