# Star Wars Episode III: A Goofy Theory **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 2, 2003, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539 "2003-03-02T05:26:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Fibber\_McGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a6a055/32.png) [@Fibber\_McGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibber_McGee)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/1 "2003-03-02T05:26:17Z")
Yeah, I know I have way too much time on my hands and am thinking about this subject way too much, especially since I’m not even that big a Star Wars fan. No need to point it out. Now then, moving on . . . What will the title of the third Star Wars prequel be? Here’s what we know about the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy and its titles: 1. The titles for the PT movies so far have been fairly lame. 2. When you examine the titles closely, in relation to the film itself and the corresponding film of the Original Trilogy, a pattern arises: Episodes I & IV: Three word title referencing a character in the film, Darth Sidious is the Phantom Menace, Luke Skywalker the New Hope. Episodes II & V: Four word title refrencing actions taken by the more overtly powerful of the two opposing forces, The Republic/Empire, which are both really just the same business under different management anyway. Episode VI: My interpretation of the title Return of the Jedi\* is that it is a four word title that refers to both the return of the Jedi - represented by Luke Skywalker - as a viable force in the galaxy, and the return of Darth Vader/Anakin Skywalker to the side of light in the final battle with the Emperor onboard the second Death Star. \*(Yes I know RotJ was originally Revenge of the Jedi, which would throw this part of theory out of whack, but I think it seems obvious George never had some great master plan for the prequels, so the original title doesn’t matter.) 3. Though the titles follow a pattern, the structure of the titles themselves do not. Episode I wasn’t called A New Menace. Episode II wasn’t called The Republic Strikes Back. This would seem to rule out a lot of possible titles that reference both the triumph of evil and the ultimate descent into darkness of Anakin, due to their structural similarity to Return of the Jedi. Rise of the Empire Rise of the Sith Revenge of the Sith Fall of the Jedi All right out. 1. The OT had one title starting with the word “A” one with the word “The” and one beginning with a verb, “Return”. In the PT we’ve had a title starting with “The” and a title starting with a verb, “Attack”. That leaves the word “A”. Therefore, logic suggests the title of Episode III will be: A Triumph/Victory for Darkness It fits all the criteria. It’s lame, it can refer to both the ultimate triumph of Darth Sidious/Emperor Palpatine and the Sith Lords/The Empire and the descent into darkness of Anakin Skywalker, it’s four words long just like the title of Episode VI but doesn’t follow the same structure as the title of Episode VI, and it starts with “A”. So there you are: \*_Star Wars Episode III: A Triumph for Darkness_ Or possibly: \*_Star Wars Episode III: A Victory for Darkness_ Maybe. I could be totally wrong. This spookily accurate (Just you wait and see. Maybe.) vision of the future was brought to you by me, good ol’ Fibber McGee! ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/2 "2003-03-02T05:32:30Z")
Uh, you’re trying to find correlations in a sample set of four movies. I don’t see how you can come up with anything meaningful from that. ---
**Author:** ![Albert\_Rose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9de053/32.png) [@Albert\_Rose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Albert_Rose)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/3 "2003-03-02T05:32:36Z")
I like it. Beats the hell out of **Shaving Vader’s Privates**. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/4 "2003-03-02T05:36:00Z")
Oops. Five Movies. ---
**Author:** ![Achernar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e274bd/32.png) [@Achernar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achernar)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/5 "2003-03-02T05:50:05Z")
Although I like literary criticism, I never took a course or read a book on it. But in my experience, trilogy moods follow a pattern, which I like to call: Hopeful, Dark, Triumphant. Does “A Triumph for Darkness” count as Triumphant? I guess so. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![ResIpsaLoquitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b3f665/32.png) [@ResIpsaLoquitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ResIpsaLoquitor)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/6 "2003-03-02T05:58:06Z")
I seriously doubt, however, that Lucas is following a formulaic pattern for the movie TITLES. IIRC, “Attack of the Clones” was so named as a flashback to 1950s B-movie sci-fi specials. He made it corny on purpose. Now, I can see “Revenge of the Sith” being a logical title in flow with the movies and a nod to “Return/Revenge of the Jedi,” but I’m not willing to pretend I understand how Lucas’ brain works. ---
**Author:** ![Fibber\_McGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a6a055/32.png) [@Fibber\_McGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibber_McGee)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/7 "2003-03-02T05:59:56Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sam Stone \* > \*\*Uh, you’re trying to find correlations in a sample set of four movies. I don’t see how you can come up with anything meaningful from that. \*\* Did you _read_ what I wrote? 😉 Go ahead and deny that the correlations I’ve suggested exist. When the title of Episode III is finally revealed we’ll revisit this topic and see if I was right, if not in the exact title then at least in the structure/significance of the title. If I’m not, who cares? I just spent way too much time working this dumb theory out not to share it. You don’t have to like it. ---
**Author:** ![Fibber\_McGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a6a055/32.png) [@Fibber\_McGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibber_McGee)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/8 "2003-03-02T06:08:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sam Stone \* > \*\*Uh, you’re trying to find correlations in a sample set of four movies. I don’t see how you can come up with anything meaningful from that. \*\* Also, it’s not like I picked a bunch of random movies and tried to make correlations between them. But at any rate, there’s a reason this thread is titled, “A Goofy Theory” and not “A Very Serious Theory”. ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/9 "2003-03-02T06:33:23Z")
**Star Wars III: Anakin Gets Cranky** ---
**Author:** ![Yumblie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/76d3ee/32.png) [@Yumblie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yumblie)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/10 "2003-03-02T06:51:20Z")
**Star Wars III: The Search For More Money** ---
**Author:** ![Fibber\_McGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a6a055/32.png) [@Fibber\_McGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibber_McGee)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/11 "2003-03-02T07:12:50Z")
No, no, no, it’s The _Quest_ for More Money! When was the last time you saw Spaceballs? ---
**Author:** ![Joe\_Cool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecb155/32.png) [@Joe\_Cool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joe_Cool)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/12 "2003-03-02T07:28:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Achernar \* > \*\*Although I like literary criticism, I never took a course or read a book on it. But in my experience, trilogy moods follow a pattern, which I like to call: Hopeful, Dark, Triumphant. Does “A Triumph for Darkness” count as Triumphant? I guess so. 😃 \*\* Interesting point: The original movies followed this pattern faithfully - [ul][li]Hopeful period for the good guys following victory at the battle of yavin, [/li][li]Dark period for the good guys, as the Empire counterattacks, smacks them down, puts them on the run, and seemingly scatters our heroes (The Breaking of the Fellowship),[/li][li]Triumph for the rebellion as the Empire is decapitated and destroyed.[/ul][/li] The prequel trilogy seems to be a complete reverse: [ul][li]Hopeful period for the bad guys, as Sideous sets his pieces up on the board and sets in motion the events that will destroy the Republic and put himself in power,[/li][li]Dark period for the bad guys, as the Republic gathers its wits, defeats Tyrannus, and makes a show of force with its new clone army,[/li][li]and the third installment, which we all know WILL be a trimph for the bad guys, as Palpatine is revealed to be an uberpowerful dark jedi, a jedi with great potential falls and becomes his sidekick, and the galaxy is plunged into tyranny as the Senate is disbanded and Palpatine declares himself Emperor.[/ul][/li] All in all, I think the OP is right on track. And I’ll be impressed if Lucas can pull off a movie where there IS no cliffhanger: we all know how the story is going to end, and he’s left filling in the middle. ---
**Author:** ![Will\_Repair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a698b9/32.png) [@Will\_Repair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Will_Repair)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/13 "2003-03-02T08:04:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Joe\_Cool \* > \*\*And I’ll be impressed if Lucas can pull off a movie where there IS no cliffhanger: we all know how the story is going to end, and he’s left filling in the middle. \*\* Even though he _says_ he has no plans to make the final trilogy he could set up a problem that could only be solved by the grandchildren of Darth. He could setup the already known presence of ET in Star Wars and C3PO and R2D2 in Raider of the Lost Ark. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 8:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/14 "2003-03-02T08:05:11Z")
> [@](#): > > Go ahead and deny that the correlations I’ve suggested exist. Okay! Deny, deny, deny, deny… ---
**Author:** ![Yumblie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/76d3ee/32.png) [@Yumblie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yumblie)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/15 "2003-03-02T08:07:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fibber McGee \* > \*\*No, no, no, it’s The _Quest_ for More Money! > > When was the last time you saw Spaceballs? \*\* I was thinking…Is it Search or Quest? Search or Quest? Against better judgement, I went with Search…but it was Quest! Guargh! This blunder will haunt me for the rest of my life. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror anymore. ---
**Author:** ![TigoleBitties](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cab0a1/32.png) [@TigoleBitties](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TigoleBitties)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/16 "2003-03-02T08:09:37Z")
Try **STAR WARS III: LUCAS TAKES ANOTHER SHIT ON FILM AND HANDS YOU A BIG SPOON** I know…supposedly someone else is doing it but god help us if they let him anywhere near anything other than the craft table ---
**Author:** ![Skeezix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/839c29/32.png) [@Skeezix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skeezix)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/17 "2003-03-02T08:19:10Z")
Guys, guys! Nevermind _Search_ or _Quest_, we need a four word title for Ep. 3 I’m thinking **Give Me Your Money**. Or possibly **Hand Over The Cash**. ---
**Author:** ![Fibber\_McGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a6a055/32.png) [@Fibber\_McGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibber_McGee)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 8:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/18 "2003-03-02T08:32:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SPOOFE \* > \*\*Okay! Deny, deny, deny, deny… \*\* Hey, I wasn’t talking to _you_ . . . ---
**Author:** ![Fibber\_McGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a6a055/32.png) [@Fibber\_McGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fibber_McGee)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 8:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/19 "2003-03-02T08:38:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Yumblie \* > \*\*I was thinking…Is it Search or Quest? Search or Quest? Against better judgement, I went with Search…but it was Quest! Guargh! This blunder will haunt me for the rest of my life. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror anymore. \*\* A wholly appropriate reaction to a grave and unforgivable error. Since I am not at your side to personally deliver the sound thrashing you deserve, I suggest using the nearest blunt object to club yourself into unconsciousness. Only then will all once more be right in the universe. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539/20 "2003-03-02T11:07:48Z")
> [@](#): > > Episodes I & IV: Three word title referencing a character in the film, Darth Sidious is the Phantom Menace, Luke Skywalker the New Hope. Nerdy nitpick: The “Phantom Menace” was the _Trade Federation_. Sort of a “sock puppet” for Sidious/Palpatine, who was the tangible menace. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-a-goofy-theory/158539.md?page=2)