# Star Wars - Episode III Crawl Revealed **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 27, 2005, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880 "2005-01-27T05:02:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Soapbox\_Monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Soapbox\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soapbox_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/41 "2005-01-28T15:55:12Z")
> [@Apos](#): > > I’m in the camp that thinks that if it’s that simple, Lucas will have sealed his fate entirely. I mean, it was incredibly, painfully obvious that he was hinting that Palpy was Sidious in the first prequel, even if you DIDN’T put two and two together on the names. And yet, despite it being the most painfully obvious assumption possible, he’s continually filmed it as if it were some big secret to be dramatically revealed later. > > If it is dramatically revealed to be just what everyone assumed it to be from the get go, then it will thus be utterly, totally pathetic. Well then I’m glad you won’t be in the theater with me. Good riddance. ---
**Author:** ![Soapbox\_Monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Soapbox\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soapbox_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/42 "2005-01-28T16:01:24Z")
> [@Case Sensitive](#): > > C’mon - you just _know_ that after the latest atrocity Lucas is just going to go right back to the start and re-make the first three all over again, in line with his “original artistic vision”. It’s been nearly thirty years, after all - just ripe for a re-make. You said it yourself. His artistic vision. He conceived the story, and can do whatever the hell he wants to it. If I were him I’d be laughing my ass off to see so many people who apparently “don’t care anymore,” yet continue to bitch, as if a gun is being held to their heads while they buy a ticket to the next installment. I’m personally grateful for the fact that the original trilogy even happened at all, especially considering all the trouble Lucas had to go through, including inventing whole new ways of making movies in the process. Would you rather have never had Star Wars at all, ever? If you don’t like the reissues, don’t buy them, that simple. If you don’t like the prequels, don’t see them. Again, pretty simple. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/43 "2005-01-28T16:09:41Z")
> [@Apos](#): > > I’m in the camp that thinks that if it’s that simple, Lucas will have sealed his fate entirely. I mean, it was incredibly, painfully obvious that he was hinting that Palpy was Sidious in the first prequel, even if you DIDN’T put two and two together on the names. And yet, despite it being the most painfully obvious assumption possible, he’s continually filmed it as if it were some big secret to be dramatically revealed later. > > If it is dramatically revealed to be just what everyone assumed it to be from the get go, then it will thus be utterly, totally pathetic. Eh, you’ve seen into the future. The group of kneebiters he’s currently targeting will presumably have not see RotJ. Anyways, I have to ask, what did you mean about ‘put two and two together on the names’? It’s not an anagram or anything. Am I missing something? -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Soapbox\_Monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Soapbox\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soapbox_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/44 "2005-01-28T16:18:40Z")
> [@Merijeek](#): > > Eh, you’ve seen into the future. The group of kneebiters he’s currently targeting will presumably have not see RotJ. > > Anyways, I have to ask, what did you mean about ‘put two and two together on the names’? It’s not an anagram or anything. > > Am I missing something? > > -Joe If you’ve only ever seen the movies, then no where does it say that the Emperor’s name is Palpatine, but in the original novelization of Star Wars: A New Hope, there is a short little blurb that explains the current political situation, and the emperor’s name is given as Palpatine. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/45 "2005-01-28T16:47:24Z")
Also, the same actor who played the Emperor in RotJ (Ian McDiarmid) plays Palpatine in 1, 2, & 3. Another big clue there. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/46 "2005-01-28T16:55:18Z")
General _Grievous_? Is Lucas even trying anymore? ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/47 "2005-01-28T17:08:18Z")
> [@Case Sensitive](#): > > C’mon - you just _know_ that after the latest atrocity Lucas is just going to go right back to the start and re-make the first three all over again, in line with his “original artistic vision”. It’s been nearly thirty years, after all - just ripe for a re-make. You will pay the price for his lack of (artistic) vision! ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/48 "2005-01-28T18:27:47Z")
Eh, so the same actor plays them both and a novelization from 1977 gives the Emperor’s name. This is not something an average movie fan will figure out on their own. Look at Ian McDiarmid - it’s 20+ years later and he looks YOUNGER than the Emperor. Certainly you guys are wrong! 😉 I can see people taking Lucas to task for certain things, but to me this one is a non-starter. -Joe, Star Wars nerd ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/49 "2005-01-28T19:04:13Z")
I just sent a nasty email to Boing Boing because Cory Doctorow posted the crawl text in a .gif on the front page without spoilering it! I’m a hardcore spoiler virgin type, but since I’ve been unwillingly deflowered, here I am. Best of the three prequel crawl texts. I am encouraged. In order to maintain my faith in humanity, I continue to hope for a good Ep. III. All of the pieces are there to make it good, he’s just got to put them together. Damnit, George, put it together! ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/50 "2005-01-28T19:53:41Z")
> [@Jonathan Chance](#): > > I think it’s OK to have some action happen off stage. We didn’t see the rebel spies steal the death star plans, after all (in IV or VI…those poor Bothans). > > Remember, we’re no longer seeing a sage of the defeat of an evil empire…we’re watching the fall and rebirth of Anakin Skywalker. Yeah, I can see that; ostensibly the “real” story of the trilogy centers on this one dude, with everything else supposedly revolving around that. But what does it say about Lucas as a storyteller when that “everything else” is far more interesting than the main character and his arc? Seriously, what would you rather watch? A bold kidnapping from the Republic’s capitol of its most important governmental figure (who furthermore may have have set up the whole thing as an elaborate piece of politically deceptive theater), or a braided ponce lurching about a meadow on a bloated tick? ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/51 "2005-01-28T20:48:08Z")
Quoth **Apos** : > [@](#): > > If it is dramatically revealed to be just what everyone assumed it to be from the get go, then it will thus be utterly, totally pathetic. Yeah, but if it’s dramatically revealed to be anything else, then it’ll be even more pathetic. And this crawl juat looks bad. Opening with “War!” might work fine in some contexts (_Fallout_, say), but here, it just shatters the narrative flow that the opening scrolls have had. Much better, IMO, if it had opened with “The Galaxy is engulfed in war”. I do have hope for this one, and I will go see it. But I’m not expecting it to be anywhere near the masterpiece that _Star Wars_ or _The Empire Strikes Back_ was. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/52 "2005-01-28T21:50:31Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > Yeah, I can see that; ostensibly the “real” story of the trilogy centers on this one dude, with everything else supposedly revolving around that. > > But what does it say about Lucas as a storyteller when that “everything else” is far more interesting than the main character and his arc? Seriously, what would you rather watch? A bold kidnapping from the Republic’s capitol of its most important governmental figure (who furthermore may have have set up the whole thing as an elaborate piece of politically deceptive theater), or a braided ponce lurching about a meadow on a bloated tick? That depends, if Jon Baker’s with him or not. Because if Jon Baker’s with Ponch, then at least it’ll be somewhat entertaining in an MST3K kind of way. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2005, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/53 "2005-01-28T22:25:17Z")
> [@paulberserker](#): > > You mean WAR! From The Onion’s _Our Dumb Century_, the headline for Dec. 7, 1941: WA- Headline continued on page 2 ---
**Author:** ![Airblairxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Airblairxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airblairxxx)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2005, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880/54 "2005-01-31T20:21:06Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > Oh, and rumor has it that Lucas is going to turn the franchise into a TV series after this. Shoot me. Shoot me now. Please. And yet I’m STILL gonna go see this when it comes out. I am a :wally [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/star-wars-episode-iii-crawl-revealed/286880.md?page=2)