# Statistically, how many men can autofellate? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 4, 2014, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426 "2014-09-04T00:19:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/21 "2014-09-05T11:47:41Z")
I can tie my own shoes. ETA: just to be clear, not with my dick. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/22 "2014-09-05T13:37:06Z")
If I could autofellate, I wouldn’t be wasting my time posting on a messageboard. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/23 "2014-09-05T17:31:09Z")
A logical followup question: can any female contortionists eat themselves? ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/24 "2014-09-05T17:38:34Z")
I assume I can’t now, and know that I couldn’t when I was at my most limber. ---
**Author:** ![Si\_Amigo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/si_amigo/32/2877_2.png) [@Si\_Amigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Si_Amigo)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/25 "2014-09-05T17:40:32Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > I don’t think having an exceptionally long penis has much to do with it. I used to be able to go all the way down to the base. (I have to disagree with **Jman**. I found autofellatio was one of the few things that really lived up to its reputation). I have not been that flexible in years. Why did you stop? :eek: If it was that great I would think someone would keep at it everyday and that your body would . . .err . . . make adjustments. 😃 If I could do that I wouldn’t stop until I needed 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![DingoelGringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9d8465/32.png) [@DingoelGringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DingoelGringo)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/26 "2014-09-05T17:44:01Z")
Brings up the old question. Why does a dog lick his balls? Because he can! ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/27 "2014-09-05T19:11:22Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > My partner can do it. He’s 6’10, skinny, very flexible and very well hung. Frankly, I don’t know what he needs me for. Can you cook? ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/28 "2014-09-06T01:16:48Z")
> [@Si\_Amigo](#): > > Why did you stop? :eek: If it was that great I would think someone would keep at it everyday and that your body would . . .err . . . make adjustments. 😃 If I could do that I wouldn’t stop until I needed 🆒 Something happened hormonally or endocrinologically or something. I went from being much more flexible than normal, to being slightly less flexible than normal in the space of a few months. Various other problems hit me at the same time. ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/29 "2014-09-06T01:28:50Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > I don’t think having an exceptionally long penis has much to do with it. I used to be able to go all the way down to the base. (I have to disagree with **Jman**. I found autofellatio was one of the few things that really lived up to its reputation)… I’ve seen the phrase “wins the thread,” but never used it before. Wins the thread. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/30 "2014-09-06T01:34:33Z")
I can, but I’m not gay, so I don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/31 "2014-09-06T01:45:01Z")
Ya know, I almost \*never \*see the guy who lives next door to me. I mean literally weeks go by and you don’t see a car come and go, never outside, _nothing!_ I’m guessing he can. ---
**Author:** ![Heracles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heracles/32/487_2.png) [@Heracles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heracles)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/32 "2014-09-06T01:57:28Z")
I resemble **awldune**. I envy **DocCathode**. Oooh, my back… ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/33 "2014-09-06T01:58:18Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I can, but I’m not gay, so I don’t. Just “auto-curious” I take it? ---
**Author:** ![Bumbershoot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbershoot/32/3428_2.png) [@Bumbershoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbershoot)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/34 "2014-09-06T02:13:29Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I can, but I’m not gay, so I don’t. If you close your eyes you can’t tell who is sucking your dick! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/35 "2014-09-06T02:28:26Z")
> [@Bumbershoot](#): > > If you close your eyes you can’t tell who is sucking your dick! 😉 Nor whose dick is in your mouth. Ewww. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/36 "2014-09-06T02:46:44Z")
spit or swallow becomes an even more serious debate. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/37 "2014-09-06T03:01:16Z")
> [@SandyHook](#): > > I can’t. > Though I remember once dreaming that I could and being very disappointed when I woke up. Let’s be honest; I believe this must be a dream we’ve all had at some point. And yes, it is disappointing upon wakening. And no, it’s not some kind of Freudian gay dream, it’s just a dream. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/38 "2014-09-06T03:43:59Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > And no, it’s not some kind of Freudian gay dream{_snip}_. But there’s nothing _wrong_ with those kinds of dreams either. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/39 "2014-09-06T05:29:19Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I can, but I’m not gay, so I don’t. That’s like saying you don’t masturbate, because that’d be a guy giving you a handjob. ---
**Author:** ![brickbacon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@brickbacon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brickbacon)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2014, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426/40 "2014-09-06T05:41:56Z")
> [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](#): > > That’s like saying you don’t masturbate, because that’d be a guy giving you a handjob. True, but most people are not as picky about putting things in their hand as they are about putting things in their mouth. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/statistically-how-many-men-can-autofellate/697426.md?page=3)