# Steelwhip **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 6, 2000, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558 "2000-01-06T17:09:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Steelwhip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@Steelwhip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steelwhip)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/1 "2000-01-06T17:09:00Z")
I’m sufering from chronic MWS … Morning Wood Syndrome. Chronic MWS. I mean every morning for the past year. I’m not bragging, just telling it like it is. My wife even chides me that the circus is in town… We wake up under the big top every day. Is this a closet disease? Now you know how I got my handle. Pun intended. ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/2 "2000-01-06T17:12:00Z")
From what I understand, only a portion of people suffer from this ailment. There called “men”. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/3 "2000-01-06T17:12:00Z")
## Is your wife “suffering” too ? Coldfire * * * “You know how complex women are” - Neil Peart, Rush (1993) ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/4 "2000-01-06T17:12:00Z")
D’oh! They’re, They’re, They’re. poopie. ---
**Author:** ![CanadianSue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@CanadianSue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanadianSue)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/5 "2000-01-06T17:13:00Z")
Hey Whip, how about a p.j. party at my place. * * * We are, each of us angels with only one wing,and we can only fly by embracing one another ---
**Author:** ![PurpleCrackwhore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc348/32.png) [@PurpleCrackwhore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PurpleCrackwhore)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/6 "2000-01-06T17:18:00Z")
Oooo Whip… I would offer to help you out on that…but the last time I got between a man and his wife…the wife wasn’t too happy with the results. Best of luck to you! * * * I really try to be good but it just isn’t in my nature! ---
**Author:** ![StrTrkr777](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@StrTrkr777](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StrTrkr777)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/7 "2000-01-06T17:34:00Z")
I tend to agree with mouthbreather. I do not see it as an affliction as much as just a way to say hello to the wife in the morning. This reminds me of a joke. This guy gets tired of asking his wife for sex every night and having her turn him down. So he decides to develop a communication process to handle the situation (pun intended). He tells her of his plan. “If you want to have sex just reach over and tug on it once. If you do not want to have sex just reach over and tug on it about a hundred times.” Jeffery ---
**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/8 "2000-01-07T06:03:00Z")
Bah-dump-bump \ Yeah **Steel** , don’t let it bug ya. My hubby has what we call “Morning Wood” pretty much every day. Just watch me chop that sucka down. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Spiritus\_Mundi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Spiritus\_Mundi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiritus_Mundi)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 6:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/9 "2000-01-07T06:07:00Z")
Every morning since the age of twelve, as near as I can recall. Why is this a problem? * * * - The best lack all conviction The worst are full of passionate intensity. \* ---
**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/10 "2000-01-07T06:11:00Z")
I think I’ve said this before, but I’ll repeat it. Steelwhip, it’s a kickstand to keep you from rolling over onto your stomach. ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/11 "2000-01-07T06:20:00Z")
Canthearya: > [@](#): > > Just watch me chop that sucka down. > 🙂 At first glance, Canth, I thought you wrote “ **chomp** that sucka down.” [panic mode]OK, OK, it’s going to be fine. You were speaking in metaphor…not talking about biting anything off[/panic mode] ::Big sigh:: ---
**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/12 "2000-01-07T06:48:00Z")
Either way, **mouthbreather**. ---
**Author:** ![Guy\_Propski](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/5e9695/32.png) [@Guy\_Propski](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guy_Propski)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/13 "2000-01-06T20:18:00Z")
Maybe you just have to pee really bad. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/14 "2000-01-06T20:22:00Z")
Just tell your wife to practice the most effective form of birth control. All she has to do is point at it and laugh. That’ll fix it. Glad to have helped! * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2000, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/15 "2000-01-06T23:16:00Z")
I thought the most effective birth control method was a peppermint. The women has to keep it between her knees. ## Works like a charm. Coldfire * * * “You know how complex women are” - Neil Peart, Rush (1993) ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/16 "2000-01-07T00:58:00Z")
> [@](#): > > The women has to keep it between her knees. You must not have much of an imagination. * * * “Popeye? Hm? He’s not much of a judge of women!” King Blozo ---
**Author:** ![tenspeedjohn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/439d5e/32.png) [@tenspeedjohn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tenspeedjohn)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/17 "2000-01-07T01:30:00Z")
I’ve heard morning wood is just a reaction to a full bladder. It can also determine if impotence is mental or physiological. I listen to too much talk radio! * * * Not so fast, you mucko! ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 9:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/18 "2000-01-07T09:59:00Z")
Padeye said: * * * You must not have much of an imagination. * * * ## You must not have much of a sense of humour 😉 Coldfire * * * “You know how complex women are” - Neil Peart, Rush (1993) ---
**Author:** ![special](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/special)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/19 "2000-01-07T14:25:00Z")
um, coldfire, honey, i think padeye’s comment was also supposed to be in fun . . . * * * The purpose of life is to matter, to count, to have it make a difference you lived at all. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558/20 "2000-01-07T14:28:00Z")
## uhm, special, my love, well… DUH 😉 Coldfire * * * “You know how complex women are” - Neil Peart, Rush (1993) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/steelwhip/12558.md?page=2)