# Stellan Skarsgard sums up Dan Brown's writing "talent" for us **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 15, 2009, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482 "2009-05-15T01:39:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/21 "2009-05-16T00:34:23Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > I haven’t read them but I think I’d probably agree with you. _But_, I think I understand where the scorn comes from, too. It’s because people who don’t normally read read The Da Vinci Code and went around proclaiming it to be the BEST BOOK _EVER!_ Not merely the _best_, but that it was also IMPORTANT, because it was BASED ON THE TRUTH! :rolleyes: First, the whole “Jesus had kids” conspiracy theory was nothing new in 2003, and _The Da Vinci Code_ was hardly the first novel to deal with this topic. Heck, well before the book came out I’d already played a computer game (_Gabriel Knight III: Blood of the Sacred, Blood of the Damned_) that covered much the same territory in a more intelligent manner. Second, although normally I’d say the blame for taking as fact something read in a work of fiction lies squarely on the shoulders of the dim-witted reader, _The Da Vinci Code_ is a special case. Dan Brown claims in a page at the beginning of the book (before the story begins) that although the book is a work of fiction the Priory of Sion is a real organization founded in the Middle Ages and the descriptions of art, documents, and rituals contained in the novel are accurate. That’s a pack of lies. Brown was just trying to stir up interest in his stupid, poorly written book. But since there are plenty of novels that DO contain well-researched factual information, I can’t wholly blame those who fell for Brown’s trick. **Eyebrows 0f Doom** , you may have forgotten this, but at the height of _DaVinci Code_-mania there were all kinds of “Behind _The Da Vinci Code_” type things on TV, in magazines and newspapers, and in the bookstores. It was _Da Vinci Code_ this and _Da Vinci Code_ that, and unlike with say _Harry Potter_-mania people were acting like this was a book that deserved attention because it contained important facts and ideas. If _The Da Vinci Code_ attracted more scorn than the average fun summer beach read it’s because it was not presented as just another fun summer beach read. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/22 "2009-05-16T02:04:19Z")
> [@Lamia](#): > > Second, although normally I’d say the blame for taking as fact something read in a work of fiction lies squarely on the shoulders of the dim-witted reader, _The Da Vinci Code_ is a special case. Dan Brown claims in a page at the beginning of the book (before the story begins) that although the book is a work of fiction the Priory of Sion is a real organization founded in the Middle Ages and the descriptions of art, documents, and rituals contained in the novel are accurate. That’s a pack of lies. Brown was just trying to stir up interest in his stupid, poorly written book. But since there are plenty of novels that DO contain well-researched factual information, I can’t wholly blame those who fell for Brown’s trick. I re-watched _Fargo_ just the other day, and the movie starts with a similar foreword about it being based on a true story, which is similarly false. Not sure what my point is, the contrast just struck me as interesting. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/23 "2009-05-16T02:16:16Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > I haven’t read them but I think I’d probably agree with you. _But_, I think I understand where the scorn comes from, too. It’s because people who don’t normally read read The Da Vinci Code and went around proclaiming it to be the BEST BOOK _EVER!_ > > It’s like when someone tells you their favorite steak is at the Sizzler, you just kind of think, “you _probably_ need to get out more.” God, yeah. Back in…2003 or something, my boss asked me if I’d read it. I said, quite truthfully, that I didn’t usually read fiction. He opened his eyes real wide and said “But it’s not fiction! It’s true!” Fortunately, then we got distracted by actual work stuff before I could say anything I’d regret. That was in the same office where someone told me she loved Ann Coulter and agreed with everything she said. _shudders_ ---
**Author:** ![BMax](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bmax/32/4267_2.png) [@BMax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMax)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/24 "2009-05-16T02:26:08Z")
> [@Kyla](#): > > God, yeah. Back in…2003 or something, my boss asked me if I’d read it. I said, quite truthfully, that I didn’t usually read fiction. He opened his eyes real wide and said “But it’s not fiction! It’s true!” > > Fortunately, then we got distracted by actual work stuff before I could say anything I’d regret. > > That was in the same office where someone told me she loved Ann Coulter and agreed with everything she said. > > _shudders_ You worked with my parents, didn’t you? ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/25 "2009-05-16T04:42:51Z")
> [@BMax](#): > > You worked with my parents, didn’t you? Do your parents work for a mortgage brokerage in the Chicago Loop? ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/26 "2009-05-16T05:31:24Z")
The movie was pretty good, surprisingly. And entertaining. The story was crappy. The science was laughable; hilariously so. Tom Hanks played an unabashed atheist, well. But the movie was not irreverent and did not bash God, although the Catholic religion got a bit bruised. I thought this movie was better than the first. The action scenes and scenery rocked. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/27 "2009-05-16T07:04:52Z")
**It’s a secret Illuminati Plot!** \<----This line from the previews just makes it impossible for me to take the movie seriously at all. Dan Brown sucks ass. Neal Stephenson was once described as Umberto Eco without the charm. Dan Brown would be Umberto Eco without the clue. Stellan Skarsgaard on the other hand is a fabulous and amazing actor, even when he plays in mediocre movies he’s awesome (King Arthur) “Finally a man worth killing.” And when he reproduces he makes some of the most fantastically beautiful offspring alive: Alexander Skaarsgaard. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/28 "2009-05-16T12:08:27Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > Cliffhangers at the end of each chapter is not exactly an original trick. All the '50s Tom Swift and Nancy Drew books used it, sometimes laughably. I’d have to check, but I think Burroughs did it also, and I’m sure he didn’t invent it. A.O. Scott made fun of Brown’s writing in the review of Angels and Demons today in the Times, btw. I even have a book series known as the “Happy Hollisters” that does that. And it is for even younger children than Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys. ---
**Author:** ![themanmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ebca7d/32.png) [@themanmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/themanmonkey)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/29 "2009-05-16T12:34:37Z")
> [@mswas](#): > > [ Dan Brown sucks ass. Neal Stephenson was once described as Umberto Eco without the charm. Dan Brown would be Umberto Eco without the clue. I like that on both counts. As a Renaissance art historian, I am very irritated by Dan Brown. Made class more difficult for a couple of terms, as I had to try to un-teach some bologna, and some students would sagely nod since I hadn’t a clue and was part of the misguided establishment. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim_r.mortiss/32/142_2.png) [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_R.Mortiss)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/30 "2009-05-16T16:15:53Z")
What do you call the opposite of _schadenfreude_? You know, misery at seeing other people being successful? There must be a name for it. I see an awful lot of it going on here…TRM ---
**Author:** ![emulsified](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emulsified/32/2915_2.png) [@emulsified](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emulsified)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/31 "2009-05-16T16:23:07Z")
Hey, Stellan Skarsgard, screw you! I _love_ peanuts. (Dan Brown on the other hand…) ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/32 "2009-05-16T16:45:45Z")
> [@Lamia](#): > > Yyou may have forgotten this, but at the height of _DaVinci Code_-mania there were all kinds of “Behind _The Da Vinci Code_” type things on TV, in magazines and newspapers, and in the bookstores. I’m currently in Paris and I’ve heard stories of hundreds of tourists wandering around the city retracing the _actual true steps_ that the characters trod. In reality, this was a little problematic as Mr. Brown’s grasp of geography was a little tenuous. If he’d done some advanced research (such as maybe looking at a map) it might have been a less non-euclidean adventure. The Parisians were happy enough to take the tourist dollars though. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/33 "2009-05-16T16:51:43Z")
> [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](#): > > What do you call the opposite of _schadenfreude_? You know, misery at seeing other people being successful? There must be a name for it. I see an awful lot of it going on here…TRM People aren’t deriding his success, merely his lack of skill. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/34 "2009-05-16T17:01:54Z")
> [@Lamia](#): > > Second, although normally I’d say the blame for taking as fact something read in a work of fiction lies squarely on the shoulders of the dim-witted reader, _The Da Vinci Code_ is a special case. Dan Brown claims in a page at the beginning of the book (before the story begins) that although the book is a work of fiction the Priory of Sion is a real organization founded in the Middle Ages and the descriptions of art, documents, and rituals contained in the novel are accurate. That’s a pack of lies. Brown was just trying to stir up interest in his stupid, poorly written book. But since there are plenty of novels that DO contain well-researched factual information, I can’t wholly blame those who fell for Brown’s trick. Well, most of the art described in the book was real, and the Prieure du Sion hoax fooled the authors of _Holy Blood, Holy Grail_ long before it fooled Brown. I don’t remember seeing any such page in the book, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/35 "2009-05-16T18:43:00Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > I’m currently in Paris and I’ve heard stories of hundreds of tourists wandering around the city retracing the _actual true steps_ that the characters trod. In reality, this was a little problematic as Mr. Brown’s grasp of geography was a little tenuous. If he’d done some advanced research (such as maybe looking at a map) it might have been a less **non-euclidean adventure**. The Parisians were happy enough to take the tourist dollars though. So, what you’re saying is that Dan brown is trying to wake up Great Cthulhu ? ---
**Author:** ![BluePitbull](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e9bcb4/32.png) [@BluePitbull](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BluePitbull)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/36 "2009-05-16T18:49:54Z")
> [@woodstockbirdybird](#): > > I’ve never read the guy and I never will, but when I saw the preview for A&D and they mentioned the Illuminati as the bad guys, I literally burst out laughing. Seriously? _The Illuminati_? Why is that improbable? ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/37 "2009-05-16T20:14:54Z")
Just answer me one thing. Does Ewan McGregor turn out to be the bad guy? From the previews, that’s my guess. Did I guess wrong? ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/38 "2009-05-16T21:49:15Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Well, most of the art described in the book was real, He didn’t claim that most of the art was real, he claimed that ALL of the art AND architecture AND documents AND secret rituals were described accurately in his book. That simply isn’t true. > [@](#): > > \*and the Prieure du Sion hoax fooled the authors of _Holy Blood, Holy Grail_ long before it fooled Brown. \*I don’t believe it “fooled” Brown at all, I think he knows perfectly well that the whole thing was a hoax. If Brown does genuinely believe the things he’s claimed as fact (not merely in the book but in many interviews on the subject) then he’s either a nutjob or a very bad researcher. About 20 years passed between the publication of _Holy Blood, Holy Grail_ and _The Da Vinci Code_, and in that time even MORE evidence came to light that the Priory of Sion and all related “historic” documents were the work of Pierre Plantard and friends. Even the most casual research on Brown’s part should have indicated that it was hardly accepted fact that “The Priory of Sion—a European secret society founded in 1099—is a real organization.” > [@](#): > > \*I don’t remember seeing any such page in the book, anyway. \*You must have forgotten it then. It’s included in the excerpt of the book on [Dan Brown’s official Web site](http://www.danbrown.com/novels/davinci_code/excerpt.html). ETA: **Frylock** , that’s my guess as well based solely upon the commercials! ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/39 "2009-05-16T22:15:09Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > Just answer me one thing. > > Does Ewan McGregor turn out to be the bad guy? From the previews, that’s my guess. Did I guess wrong? Nope, you’re right. He is the ultimate bad guy, impersonating an Illuminati master. There is another bad guy, an unnamed assassin, who does most of the murders, but he is hired by McGregor’s character. Personally, I thought that both books were cheesy, but they moved so fast they were definitely enjoyable reads. But I wouldn’t base my life on anything “factual” in them, I’m not a psycho. And they are labeled as fiction after all. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2009, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482/40 "2009-05-16T22:22:25Z")
Yeah, if I was reading a novel that made excessive factual claims, at some point I would question why the author chose the novel format. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stellan-skarsgard-sums-up-dan-browns-writing-talent-for-us/496482.md?page=3)