# Stephen Hawking 70th birthday mystery: Women **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 6, 2012, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585 "2012-01-06T03:13:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2012, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/1 "2012-01-06T03:13:33Z")
Stephen Hawkings biggest unsolved mysteries: (1) How he survived so long (2) Biggest mystery according to Hawking himself: Women First, a serious article about his up-coming 70th birthday: “Stephen Hawking to turn 70, defying disease” by Maria Cheng > **[Yahoo News: Latest and Breaking News, Headlines, Live Updates, and More](https://news.yahoo.com/)** > > The latest news and headlines from Yahoo News. Get breaking news stories and in-depth coverage with videos and photos. Lede: [QUOTE=Associated Press] CAMBRIDGE, England (AP) — British scientist Stephen Hawking has decoded some of the most puzzling mysteries of the universe but he has left one mystery unsolved: How he has managed to survive so long with such a crippling disease. [/quote] Then, there’s this: “Women are a mystery to British physicist Hawking” [http://news.yahoo.com/women-mystery-british-physicist-hawking-135814776.html](http://news.yahoo.com/women-mystery-british-physicist-hawking-135814776.html) [QUOTE=Reuters] LONDON (Reuters) - The biggest mystery in the universe perplexing one of the world’s best known scientists is – women. When New Scientist magazine asked “Brief History of Time” author Stephen Hawking what he thinks about most, the Cambridge University professor renowned for unravelling some of the most complex questions in modern physics answered: “Women. They are a complete mystery.” [/quote] You need only imagine the reader comments to that one. A sampling: [QUOTE=Stan] Stephen, just think of women as either black holes, dark energy or dark matter. They can suck you in, pull you apart, reduce you to the smallest element and spin you in circles at near the speed of light. And like gravity, their pull is irresistible to the average male mass. [/quote] [QUOTE=Michelle] I don’t understand women either, despite having been one for forty-plus years now. [/quote] [QUOTE=Retired\_LC] Gentlemen, we are screwed. Stephen Hawking can figure out black holes in the universe but he can’t figure out women? What chance do we normal people have? [/quote] [QUOTE=Joe Flor] Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman’s sex drive by 90%.. It’s called a Wedding Cake. [/quote] [QUOTE=Glen] If a man states an opinion in the woods and there is no woman to hear him, is he still wrong? [/quote] [QUOTE=Packer Fan In Michigan] Someone once said that the difference between men and women was that men only want one thing from every woman while women want everything from only one man. [/quote] [QUOTE=Kurt] Stephen Hawking announces the biggest mystery in the universe is women. In related news, Tiger Wood’s ex-wife [bull-dozes a 12 million dollar mansion](http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/golf-devil-ball-golf/tiger-woods-ex-wife-bulldozes-12-million-home-232405259.html)… I think he might be on to something! [Link added.] [/quote] ---
**Author:** ![Telperion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telperion/32/509_2.png) [@Telperion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperion)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2012, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/2 "2012-01-06T04:52:39Z")
He makes it sound so easy. In my experience, women are more like 3.5 billion mysteries. ---
**Author:** ![Shakester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shakester/32/437_2.png) [@Shakester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shakester)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2012, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/3 "2012-01-06T06:41:53Z")
Cue women complaining that they make perfect sense and that all any women really wants is to be loved and appreciated, followed by a long, complex, and entirely nonsensical list of reasons why she didn’t mean by _you_ when she said that. ---
**Author:** ![robotic\_panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed8c4c/32.png) [@robotic\_panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robotic_panda)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2012, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/4 "2012-01-06T13:43:16Z")
Really! Why don’t dudes just do what they do with chicks, but with dudes! It’d be so much easier! …What? ---
**Author:** ![enomaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@enomaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enomaj)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2012, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/5 "2012-01-06T17:12:22Z")
Elin Nordegren bulldozes a $12 million home. Well, damn! ---
**Author:** ![Kozmik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8dc957/32.png) [@Kozmik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kozmik)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2012, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/6 "2012-01-06T17:31:25Z")
I _read_ **Stephen Hawking 700th birthday mystery: Women**. ---
**Author:** ![Fool\_in\_the\_Rain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8491ac/32.png) [@Fool\_in\_the\_Rain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fool_in_the_Rain)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2012, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/7 "2012-01-06T17:40:04Z")
Women are a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an en… …what OW! uhm…Women are beautiful caring wonderful people who are just misunderstood. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2012, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/8 "2012-01-06T19:52:01Z")
> [@robotic\_panda](#): > > Really! Why don’t dudes just do what they do with chicks, but with dudes! It’d be so much easier! …What? Like smacking them upside the head for being out of the kitchen? ---
**Author:** ![handsomeharry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9c0ed/32.png) [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2012, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/9 "2012-01-07T02:20:51Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > Like smacking them upside the head for being out of the kitchen? Yes…or \*other \*times when they need it. ---
**Author:** ![Theophane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@Theophane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Theophane)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2012, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stephen-hawking-70th-birthday-mystery-women/608585/10 "2012-01-07T02:31:49Z")
Who needs women when you’ve got the entire universe on the end of a string?