# Stolen beer truck crashes into barn **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 2, 2015, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184 "2015-12-02T03:29:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![boffking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/858c86/32.png) [@boffking](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boffking)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/1 "2015-12-02T03:29:18Z")
[http://www.wcsh6.com/story/news/local/2015/12/01/beer-truck-stolen-portland-711-crashes-into-barn-limerick/76609836/](http://www.wcsh6.com/story/news/local/2015/12/01/beer-truck-stolen-portland-711-crashes-into-barn-limerick/76609836/) This has been the talk of the town today. A 19 year old girl stole a beer truck when it was making a delivery at a store. She was high on heroin, and drove it about 40 miles before crashing into a barn. ---
**Author:** ![donkeyoatey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47c2d/32.png) [@donkeyoatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/donkeyoatey)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/2 "2015-12-02T04:03:45Z")
There was a young girl high on crank Had no time to visit a bank When they said “You hit a shed” She replied “Why didn’t it shred, I could have sworn this was a tank.” ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/3 "2015-12-02T04:34:50Z")
There once was a drugged up girl from Limerick It sounds like her many charges will stick Of the truck that she stole & in the barn left a hole Maybe this time they’ll build it with brick ---
**Author:** ![blue\_infinity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blue_infinity/32/2817_2.png) [@blue\_infinity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blue_infinity)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/4 "2015-12-02T04:52:50Z")
Girl plays with needles Happiness is a warm truck The beer is no more ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/5 "2015-12-02T04:59:17Z")
There once was a girl so slight whose eyes were exceedingly bright. She came much too near to a truck full of beer. And drove it off into the night. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/6 "2015-12-02T16:42:28Z")
A girl took some internet flack when her night went a wee bit off track. “Did I leave that hole?” said the girl named Nicole “That must have been some mighty fine smack.” ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/7 "2015-12-02T16:48:38Z")
Was the beer OK? ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/8 "2015-12-02T16:56:36Z")
Headline from [Jalopnik.](http://jalopnik.com/angry-orchard-truck-seeks-revenge-for-fallen-tree-breth-1745581180) “Angry Orchard Truck Seeks Revenge For Fallen Tree Brethren By Taking Out Wooden Barn” ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/9 "2015-12-02T17:11:05Z")
There once was a girl that could fuck Up delivery of beer by a truck Not giving a darn She smashed into a barn Angry Orchard is a peach of a puck. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/10 "2015-12-02T17:12:11Z")
> [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](#): > > Was the beer OK? It was hard cider, not beer. ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/11 "2015-12-02T18:17:26Z")
A young junkie was wandering and spied her, A vulnerable truck so she decided to ride’ er. Smashed into a barn, and ruined a farm, and ended up with cold peaches in cider. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/12 "2015-12-02T18:44:26Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > It was hard cider, not beer. Most likely there was beer, liquor and non-alcoholic drinks on board. Depends on the distributor, contracts, service areas and the specific route the truck was on. I used to drive for a distributor and despite the giant “SNAPPLE” on the truck, it was a mix of products. ---
**Author:** ![BeeGee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b5a626/32.png) [@BeeGee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BeeGee)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/13 "2015-12-02T18:48:23Z")
You think the orchard was angry, oi! Talk to the barn owner. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/14 "2015-12-02T18:51:14Z")
With all those drugs in her system, I’m amazed she could hit the broad side of a barn. ---
**Author:** ![Totenfeier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@Totenfeier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Totenfeier)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stolen-beer-truck-crashes-into-barn/739184/15 "2015-12-02T18:56:41Z")
I’m getting a weird vision here…something like the Grateful Dead guest-starring on the Great White North…“What a long, strange trip it’s been, eh?”