# Stop calling me a "young person!" (weak/lame) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 4, 2004, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072 "2004-11-04T22:50:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Salem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Salem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Salem)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2004, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/21 "2004-11-07T15:25:05Z")
I’m 45 and looked 17 when I was 11, 17 when I was 17 and 17 when I was in my late 20’s. I got carded when I was in my early thirties and had my then-5 year old daughter with me. And, as someone already said, it’s not so much the looking young part, but the lack of respect _because_ someone assumes your age to be younger. There are people who just seem to have to play the age card to make themselves feel wiser. Sorry, but I was intelligent and competent (back before I had kids, of course!) and experienced and just because I looked young (and being a female, it can be worse) did not mean I was less competent or intelligent than someone who perceived themselves to be much older than me. And it’s not always an age thing, either. I find this A LOT with parents. Parents who have older kids just assume they have all the knowledge. My ex-sister-in-law was famous for this. Her son was born two years before my daughter. I can’t tell you how many of her sentences began with “Well, when you have a child that’s R’s age…” Or then when she had a second child before I did…“Well, just wait til you have TWO, then you’ll really know what it’s like.” The funniest part of the whole thing being that my Ex, her brother, was a parent six years before she was. But that never seemed to count. :rolleyes: I now have three kids and she stopped at two, so every once in awhile, I have to admit, I would say something about her having _no idea_ what’s it’s like to _really_ be a parent when you have _three_ kids…(But typically I try very hard NOT to do that to anyone. I hate being on the receiving end, so I try not to be on the giving end.) What happens to me now though, people will see me out in public with my 3 year old in tow and automatically assume he’s my first and only and they are much more older, wiser and experienced parents who can’t wait to tell me “how it is”. Sometimes I just let it go, but if someone really pushes it, I will mention my grandson or my oldest of three that’s in high school or something along those lines. It’s the condescending attitude that just burns me. Gee, how did my kids survive without your sage wisdom to guide me all these years. ---
**Author:** ![START](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@START](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/START)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2004, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/22 "2004-11-07T19:06:40Z")
> [@Omega Glory](#): > > No offense **Start** , but did you read any of the posts besides the opener before you posted? I’d think that this quoted section would clear up a lot of your questions in regard to **Misnomer** > > Plus, she’s mentioned that she’s female, so growing a beard probably isn’t a viable option for her:). All I can really say is :smack: I was being stupid, it was late when I wrote that but on the other hand alot of old ladies do have facial hair. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2004, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/23 "2004-11-07T19:43:43Z")
> [@START](#): > > I don’t get it…shouldn’t you be happy? When I’m 33 I hope I could look 20 something heck I am in High School now and if I had the exact same face at 30 something that I do now I’d be happy not pitting my situation. If you look to young grow some facial hair and you’ll be fine. I’d rather look way younger and have people call me a young person while I am an adult than to look way older and have everybody calling me sir and giving me senior citizen discounts. Well, yes it is nice being able to pass myself off as a college student (I’m 32) to the young girls. Actually My girlfriend and I (shes 29) have couple pictures of us all the way back to when we met ten years ago and they pretty much look the same. So in that sense, it’s nice. On the other hand, it is frustrating when people your age act in a condescending manner because they think you are much younger. But, then back on the first hand, sometimes you can use that to your advantage to let someone think you have less knowledge or experience than you really do. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2004, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/24 "2004-11-07T19:50:40Z")
So basically what you’re saying is that **Misnomer** isn’t a young person, but “young person” is a misnomer? _ **d&r** _ ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2004, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/25 "2004-11-07T22:21:03Z")
Close: **Misnomer** _is_ a young person, but “young person” is a misnomer. 🙂 Oh, and 😛 😉 ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2004, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/26 "2004-11-07T22:39:19Z")
I’ve always looked…indistinctly young. (Note to the masses: just because someone’s short doesn’t mean that they’re a child!!). First time I ever went out on a ‘real’ date (dinner and a movie), the waitress offered me a kids’ menu. I was 16. :mad: :mad: :mad: Also, yeah, can I nominate those who talk about ‘kids these days’ and how horrible we all are, etc, for the ‘I’m a Total Jackass’ award? Because, honestly, kids in your days were no fucking better. ---
**Author:** ![zweisamkeit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zweisamkeit/32/4360_2.png) [@zweisamkeit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zweisamkeit)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2004, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/27 "2004-11-08T00:23:45Z")
You know how Sam’s Club has free sample trays on Saturday afternoons? Well, you need to be over 12 to take one by yourself, otherwise you need a parent (presumably to prevent allergic reactions, etc). I would be asked, “are you over 12, dear?” when I was (I shit you not) 2 months short of being 18 years old. Just last Christmas, my uncle’s (by marriage of my blood-aunt) mother asked me if I was going to be getting my drivers license soon. I was 21. She thought I was a sophomore in high school. This February (nearing the end of my 21st year), I went to buy an R-rated movie at Blockbuster, and the girl at the counter asked, “are you over 17? I need to see ID.” The absolutely _amazing_ thing about this is that I have a huge rack! I could see if I was a tiny wisp of a thing, but I have a 36F chest (with matching hips with smaller waist, thank God), and have for years! How many 12/16/17 year olds have that? ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2004, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/28 "2004-11-08T05:11:05Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > But, then back on the first hand, sometimes you can use that to your advantage to let someone think you have less knowledge or experience than you really do. I will admit that I am not always quick to correct people’s assumptions about me. Especially when I’ve been pigeonholed: I have shocked just as many people by playing classical music at my desk as I have by playing heavy metal (my musical taste is eclectic, and what I listen to largely depends on my mood). It can be fun to see the looks on their faces, and answer them fake-ingenuously when they sputter that they’re surprised to hear me listening to that kind of music. Stupid people. Same people who have a hard time accepting my real age…and then nearly faint when I break out the tattoos. Heh. > [@zweisamkeit](#): > > Just last Christmas, my uncle’s (by marriage of my blood-aunt) mother asked me if I was going to be getting my drivers license soon. I was 21. She thought I was a sophomore in high school. I hear ya: my maternal grandmother died when I was 28, and nearly every distant relative I saw at the viewing/funeral asked me how much longer I had until I finished my bachelor’s degree… > [@](#): > > _This February (nearing the end of my 21st year), I went to buy an R-rated movie at Blockbuster, and the girl at the counter asked, “are you over 17? I need to see ID.”_ When I was 14 I got carded at a PG-13 movie. “Murphy’s Romance,” starring Sally Field. My friends teased me about that for a few months afterward. 🙂 > [@](#): > > _How many 12/16/17 year olds have that?_ Well, with all of the plastic surgery going on with teens these days… :eek: 😉 ---
**Author:** ![pencilpusher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d6d6ee/32.png) [@pencilpusher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pencilpusher)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2004, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/29 "2004-11-08T05:24:32Z")
Hell I’d GLADLY be called a young person! I’m only 35 but someone of a younger age than myself called me an old bitch yesterday! :eek: Good grief, let it slide. One day you will be wishing they would mistake you for a much younger person!! I know I do… ☹ ---
**Author:** ![SusanStoHelit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@SusanStoHelit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SusanStoHelit)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2004, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072/30 "2004-11-08T18:54:38Z")
> [@zweisamkeit](#): > > The absolutely _amazing_ thing about this is that I have a huge rack! I could see if I was a tiny wisp of a thing, but I have a 36F chest (with matching hips with smaller waist, thank God), and have for years! How many 12/16/17 year olds have that? You’d be [suprised](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=283005&highlight=boob) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-calling-me-a-young-person-weak-lame/273072.md?page=1)