# Stop crapping on my car! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 3, 2012, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774 "2012-05-03T18:08:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![sparky\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/77aa72/32.png) [@sparky\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sparky_1)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/1 "2012-05-03T18:08:52Z")
I now have a shared parking spot here at work (shared with one other person and alternate weeks). It’s the only spot in our lot that’s under a tree, and I’ve only had it since winter. I bought a new car 2 weekends ago. This is my week to have the parking spot, and guess what? Spring has brought out the birds. They are covering my new car with crap every day! Guess I’ll have to invest in a wash bucket, sponge and soap when I get home. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/2 "2012-05-03T18:10:09Z")
I’m glad to find out it’s only birds. ---
**Author:** ![PacifistPorcupine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PacifistPorcupine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PacifistPorcupine)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/3 "2012-05-03T18:14:41Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > I’m glad to find out it’s only birds. Makes me wonder whose car I’ve been crapping on. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/4 "2012-05-03T18:39:26Z")
Sorry. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/5 "2012-05-03T18:44:10Z")
You need a bumper sticker with this curse from some graffiti found in Pompeii: > [@](#): > > To the one defecating here. Beware of the curse. If you look down on this curse, may you have an angry Jupiter for an enemy. ETA: I suspect that whoever it was that was defecating there most likely died in the eruption of Vesuvius. So the curse must have worked, though I didn’t think volcanoes were Jupiter’s standard MO… ---
**Author:** ![gwendee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/35a633/32.png) [@gwendee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gwendee)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/6 "2012-05-03T18:53:19Z")
As I clicked to open the thread I realized where I was and thought “please let it be birds. PLEASE!” My car isn’t even new and it would bug me. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/7 "2012-05-03T18:54:28Z")
Just be happy they’re not Foo birds. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/8 "2012-05-03T20:11:23Z")
My husband invested in a canopy. Maybe you could get the other person to go halves with you. The canopy only lasted for about a year, but it was worth it. One of the features of our new house is a carport. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Cornholio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ed8c4c/32.png) [@The\_Great\_Cornholio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Cornholio)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/9 "2012-05-03T20:19:28Z")
You need to get the poo off the paintwork NOW, don’t wait till you get home. The acid in it starts eating into modern car paint in about 20 minutes, if you leave it on for any length of time you will never get rid of the bloom, it’ll always be visible at some angle in the sunlight, especially on a brand new car. ---
**Author:** ![sparky\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/77aa72/32.png) [@sparky\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sparky_1)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/10 "2012-05-03T20:31:16Z")
Washing it now isn’t really an option, besides, it’s been there all day. I’m sure it will, ahem, “buff out”. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/11 "2012-05-03T20:57:10Z")
your car looks better with a hood ornament. ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/12 "2012-05-03T21:25:27Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > Just be happy they’re not Foo birds. Well, if the Foo shits… ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/13 "2012-05-03T22:49:24Z")
Buy a plastic owl and put it in the tree. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2012, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/14 "2012-05-03T23:44:26Z")
If any OP should have ever ended with an “and shit” that was it. And shit. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/15 "2012-05-04T00:21:00Z")
Only the important people get assigned parking spaces. Intercompany post for a lesser position, one where you’ll have to park in a different space every time. Since there no trees in the far end of the lot, no birds to sit over your car. Problem solved! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![araminty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b5e925/32.png) [@araminty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/araminty)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/16 "2012-05-04T02:35:50Z")
> [@The\_Great\_Cornholio](#): > > You need to get the poo off the paintwork NOW, don’t wait till you get home. The acid in it starts eating into modern car paint in about 20 minutes, if you leave it on for any length of time you will never get rid of the bloom, it’ll always be visible at some angle in the sunlight, especially on a brand new car. Cite? Since when is bird poo acidic? You don’t even know what kind of bird. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![sparky\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/77aa72/32.png) [@sparky\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sparky_1)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/17 "2012-05-04T13:37:48Z")
Well, it all washed off at the car wash. It was interesting that the spots on the paint came right off, but any spots on glass took some after wash scrubbing with a credit card edge. Anyway, new car still looks new. ---
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2012, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/18 "2012-05-04T17:44:40Z")
If you live near the seacoast, it can get bad. Seagulls routinely pick up clams and mussels, fly up a few hundred feet, and drop them-they then descend to feast on the now-mangled shellfish. If you don’t wash clam guts off your car right away, it will bond with the paint! But pine sap is the worst-it dissolves car paint ---
**Author:** ![Pops1963](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9de053/32.png) [@Pops1963](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pops1963)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2012, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/19 "2012-05-06T06:10:53Z")
Well while we are at it do not us dish soap(Dawn etc.) it will take off the wax ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2012, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774/20 "2012-05-06T12:43:07Z")
Then stop parking your shiny people capsule in my territory! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-crapping-on-my-car/620774.md?page=2)