# Stop it, you fucking stapler-crazed monkeys! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 15, 2006, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766 "2006-04-15T07:18:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Crab\_Rangoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Crab\_Rangoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crab_Rangoon)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2006, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766/41 "2006-04-18T18:51:56Z")
In my government office it’s binder clips. Can’t get 'em. I used to use them with abandon in the first innocent years. I remember it well. Then - I ran out. I went down to the supply cabinet to get more. Not there. I asked supply person if there were any more. No - what do you need them for? Well, to bind papers together with, I replied. We don’t have any. Oh, apparently I did not get the memo. So - back to the boring old paper clips for me. Or, of course, if you have a 30-page document, Elastic band time!!! Sometimes I go steal them from the Commissioner’s Office. They still seem to be able to get them… :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766/42 "2006-04-19T14:02:29Z")
When you need a binder clip, you need a binder clip. That might be the litmus test for if an office is worth working for or not - ask to see their supply cabinet during the interview, and if there are no binder clips, regretfully decline the position. (I am not completely joking.) ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766/43 "2006-04-19T14:09:43Z")
> [@featherlou](#): > > Ooh, an electric stapler. The Holy Grail of office supplies. For you, dear, I submit to you [my electric stapler](http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a203/Missy2U_/Apr18_001.jpg). [It’s SEE THROUGH!!!](http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a203/Missy2U_/Apr18_002.jpg) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BiblioCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ed8c4c/32.png) [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766/44 "2006-04-19T18:34:27Z")
> [@Crab Rangoon](#): > > I asked supply person if there were any more. No - what do you need them for? Well, to bind papers together with, I replied. I hate when you need something simple like binder clips and the power-crazed Armed Guard in Charge of the Office Supplies grills you like you’re taking off with the Crown Jewels. Next time, tell him the boss wants them to put on his nipples. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2006, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766/45 "2006-04-19T23:46:55Z")
Start using [this](http://www.3rdrecon.org/delta/Sell_Items/K_Bars.htm) to remove staples and I suspect you will get paper clips from now on. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2006, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766/46 "2006-04-20T17:37:49Z")
> [@featherlou](#): > > Ooh, an electric stapler. The Holy Grail of office supplies. My parents had an OLD (early 70s at the newest) electric stapler in the office/homework room when I was growing up. I remember it used to make a sound like Muad’Dib killing someone with his Weirding Module… **mmmmm…CHOK!** ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2006, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766/47 "2006-04-20T18:05:09Z")
Yep, we’ve got a vendor who folds bills three times, then staples across the fold so that to see the bill at all you have to tear out all the staples. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stop-it-you-fucking-stapler-crazed-monkeys/352766.md?page=2)