# Stories about how what a person did on the internet ruined their lives **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 22, 2013, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415 "2013-09-22T03:31:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/61 "2013-09-24T18:51:52Z")
> [@Evil\_Captor](#): > > Yes, freedom of expression, it’s a terrible thing. Gotta teach people they are just cogs in the machine. Not at all - what people have to learn is that freedom comes at a price. Freedom is power, and power should be used responsibly, with an awareness it has consequences. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/62 "2013-09-24T19:17:57Z")
> [@epbrown01](#): > > Not at all - what people have to learn is that freedom comes at a price. Freedom is power, and power should be used responsibly, with an awareness it has consequences. Yes, freedom, a terrible thing, hated and feared by many. You are just saying it is good to punish people for freely expressing themselves. I get that. I understand you. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/63 "2013-09-24T19:19:59Z")
> [@Evil\_Captor](#): > > Yes, freedom, a terrible thing, hated and feared by many. You are just saying it is good to punish people for freely expressing themselves. I get that. I understand you. That’s not at all what he is saying. Way to twist his words. ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/64 "2013-09-24T19:22:26Z")
The small company I worked in was taken over by a large corporation. Three days into the change, they fired the receptionist for posting another employee’s ID photo picture as her own on her FB profile (as a joke). They canned her immediately for innappropriate use of company assets (the other employee’s ID photo). The rest of us immediately got the message about the overlords looking at the net. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/65 "2013-09-24T19:45:02Z")
> [@hajario](#): > > That’s not at all what he is saying. Way to twist his words. Allow me to explain. I was understanding his words and replaying to his underlying meaning. For example, suppose epbrown was to tell me I was a monkey-faced flinger of other people’s poo. And in response I gave him a left hook that knocked him into next Tuesday. And you, bystanding, said, “What the hell was that all about?” And I said, “What epbrown has to learn is that freedom comes at a price. Freedom is power, and power should be used responsibly, with an awareness it has consequences. He used his freedom to describe me in a way that chipped away at the respect people have for my public persona. And so I consequenced his face but good!” You may argue that epbrown was not advocating violence, but this thread is all about people getting fired for things they said on Facebook. It’s EXACTLY the same over-reaction to simple freedom of expression that I did when I gave epbrown that left hook. “Wanna say this about my company/me eh? Well take THIS!” Bam! No more job. Now if the response were simply a good talking-to to the employee in question, perhaps even calling into question the morality of his mother and the elderberry-smell of his father, that’s OK, it’s an apprpriate response. But the notion that firing people for free expression is a good thing, normal and to be expected … naaaah, not buying it. Not for a minute. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/66 "2013-09-24T20:44:56Z")
I think you’re confusing ‘warning people about the distinct possibility of negative repercussions’ with ‘joining in with pitchforks and torches to hunt down those who dare show any personality on social media.’ Because otherwise, if you’re advocating that people just let that freak flag fly no matter what, you are encouraging them to go ahead and get themselves fired by NoHumor MegaCorp. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/67 "2013-09-24T21:00:54Z")
> [@Evil\_Captor](#): > > Allow me to explain. I was understanding his words and replaying to his underlying meaning. > > For example, suppose epbrown was to tell me I was a monkey-faced flinger of other people’s poo. And in response I gave him a left hook that knocked him into next Tuesday. > > And you, bystanding, said, “What the hell was that all about?” > > And I said, “What epbrown has to learn is that freedom comes at a price. Freedom is power, and power should be used responsibly, with an awareness it has consequences. He used his freedom to describe me in a way that chipped away at the respect people have for my public persona. And so I consequenced his face but good!” > > You may argue that epbrown was not advocating violence, but this thread is all about people getting fired for things they said on Facebook. It’s EXACTLY the same over-reaction to simple freedom of expression that I did when I gave epbrown that left hook. “Wanna say this about my company/me eh? Well take THIS!” Bam! No more job. > > Now if the response were simply a good talking-to to the employee in question, perhaps even calling into question the morality of his mother and the elderberry-smell of his father, that’s OK, it’s an apprpriate response. > > But the notion that firing people for free expression is a good thing, normal and to be expected … naaaah, not buying it. Not for a minute. Amazing that you have absolutely no understanding of what people are saying in this thread. No one has suggested that it’s a good thing, but in fact it’s an increasingly normal thing, and because of this it SHOULD be at the least considered if not expected, and can certainly have negative consequences, as I’ve personally learned. ---
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/68 "2013-09-24T21:43:28Z")
> [@Evil\_Captor](#): > > Allow me to explain. I was understanding his words and replaying to his underlying meaning. > > For example, suppose epbrown was to tell me I was a monkey-faced flinger of other people’s poo. And in response I gave him a left hook that knocked him into next Tuesday. > > And you, bystanding, said, “What the hell was that all about?” > > And I said, “What epbrown has to learn is that freedom comes at a price. Freedom is power, and power should be used responsibly, with an awareness it has consequences. He used his freedom to describe me in a way that chipped away at the respect people have for my public persona. And so I consequenced his face but good!” > > You may argue that epbrown was not advocating violence, but this thread is all about people getting fired for things they said on Facebook. It’s EXACTLY the same over-reaction to simple freedom of expression that I did when I gave epbrown that left hook. “Wanna say this about my company/me eh? Well take THIS!” Bam! No more job. > > Now if the response were simply a good talking-to to the employee in question, perhaps even calling into question the morality of his mother and the elderberry-smell of his father, that’s OK, it’s an apprpriate response. > > But the notion that firing people for free expression is a good thing, normal and to be expected … naaaah, not buying it. Not for a minute. Your example was actually pretty good, and you missed your own point. Say someone posts their Social Security number on Facebook. By your lights, they’ve got freedom of expression and can post it if they want. And there’s no doubt that the people who abuse that information criminally are the ones in the wrong, morally and legally. But since a reasonable person would be aware of the possible negative consequences, the responsible thing to do is not make that information public. Take another perspective - if I were to post your SS# online and all sorts of mayhem kicked off, would you blame the criminals that abused the information, or the person that made it available to them? Would you accept the reasoning that it’s not my fault there’s a bunch of criminals online? Then why do it to yourself? What we’re talking about is simply the modern day equivalent of keeping your blinds down at your house, so everyone doesn’t know your business. You’re arguing that it’s your house and you should be able to do what you want, which is true - but it’s unreasonable to think no one’s looking in. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/69 "2013-09-24T23:04:09Z")
> [@Evil\_Captor](#): > > I think you were seriously and deliberately screwed over by your old HR manager. You hold ultimate responsibility for making the jokes, but what she did went WAAAAY over the line. She hate you, Jim. I’m going to climb out on a limb and say that I don’t think that’s the whole story. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/70 "2013-09-25T00:28:33Z")
> [@MandaJo](#): > > I know any number of people who I think have hurt their careers and are totally oblivious to it. Not because of any one dramatic incident, but a slow chipping away of respect because they made public a persona that was significantly more sexual, or more emotionally petty/dramatic, or was more politically radical than what they present at work. There’s a reason we tamp those things down at work. Yes, we definitely tamp it down at work, and essentially always have. But are we ever NOT on the spot any more? The share-everything culture of social media has made it damn easy for some people to post stuff that is not at all flattering, where people may see it who may not want to associate with someone who does such things. And it should require people to use caution: > [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Amazing that you have absolutely no understanding of what people are saying in this thread. No one has suggested that it’s a good thing, but in fact it’s an increasingly normal thing, and because of this it SHOULD be at the least considered if not expected, and can certainly have negative consequences, as I’ve personally learned. > [@epbrown01](#): > > […] But since a reasonable person would be aware of the possible negative consequences, the responsible thing to do is not make that information public. > […] > What we’re talking about is simply the modern day equivalent of keeping your blinds down at your house, so everyone doesn’t know your business. You’re arguing that it’s your house and you should be able to do what you want, which is true - but it’s unreasonable to think no one’s looking in. There may come a day a couple of business generations down the pike when enough people in positions of responsibility will have something embarrassing flying around the cloud to render the threat meaningless; or at that time there may finally come into the online world a change in both technology and attitude that results in easy access to and diligent use of prudent and reasonable measures to protect privacy, and as long as you bother to do so then there will arise a new set of social standards to the effect of “digging for it was a crass and rude thing to do, and if it does not directly link to our work functions, we will not be tools of blackmail”. Either day is not yet here. ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/71 "2013-09-25T01:02:24Z")
I came pretty close to ruining my life. Right after I went on line about 1997 I discovered that I could easily meet girls on line. I quickly became addcited to it. Almost like fishing. I would throw out the bait and see what i could reel in. My problem was I didn’t realize what a high I was on and I kept it up night and day for about 9 months before I realized. My reputation at work was garbage because I bragged about it, which is totally out of character for me. My girlfriend packed up and left. I dropped any kind of social life and did nothing but see how many women I could score on. ``` It only took a few months to restore my work reputation but I was told by my boss afterward that they thought I had kind of lossed it and were considering firing me. Once I stopped the behavior everything went back to normal pretty quick. ``` ---
**Author:** ![bengangmo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/50afbb/32.png) [@bengangmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bengangmo)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/72 "2013-09-25T01:09:49Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > There may come a day a couple of business generations down the pike when enough people in positions of responsibility will have something embarrassing flying around the cloud to render the threat meaningless; or at that time there may finally come into the online world a change in both technology and attitude that results in easy access to and diligent use of prudent and reasonable measures to protect privacy, and as long as you bother to do so then there will arise a new set of social standards to the effect of “digging for it was a crass and rude thing to do, and if it does not directly link to our work functions, we will not be tools of blackmail”. Either day is not yet here. This is what I firmly believe will happen - frankly, who amongst us doesn’t show different personas to different people and hasn’t done stuff that our bosses or whatever wouldn’t like? The day will come, when there is just so much of this information flying around that people will stop caring, and just look at how you deal with them. ---
**Author:** ![DummyGladHands](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/49beb7/32.png) [@DummyGladHands](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DummyGladHands)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/73 "2013-09-25T02:45:01Z")
I knew a guy who used the same screen name for every message board he belonged to-cars, astronomy, antique cameras, stock & futures, people of 1/2 native American heritage, widowers, weather spotters etc. Someone who took offense at something he said on one of them, stalked thru his screen name all of his posts on all of the various boards, and found out way too much about him, to the point that he really did cause him some financial and legal problems. ---
**Author:** ![April\_R](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/74 "2013-09-25T04:31:18Z")
I pretty much use the same screen name too! eek edit: I just googled April R and I am safe. It comes up with a ton of results for people who aren’t me. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![April\_R](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@April\_R](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April_R)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/75 "2013-09-25T04:59:23Z")
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning up results for my other common username. Phew! ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/76 "2013-09-25T05:06:51Z")
> [@Colophon](#): > > A raw-food restaurateur, no less. Giving rise to an article headed [Onan the Vegetarian](http://nymag.com/news/features/16576/). 😛 He also went on to say: > [@](#): > > As for his R-train exploits, Hoyt says, “I’ve met women who enjoy it. After this incident happened, I had a woman tell me, ‘You know, that sounds exciting to me.’ She wouldn’t mind being on the other end.”… > > Hoyt believes that if he and Nguyen had only met under different circumstances, she might really like him. “You know, she’d go, ‘That guy’s pretty cool. He’s got this restaurant, and he’s fun,’” Hoyt says. “She’d probably want to go out with me.” [http://gawker.com/164750/new-york-mag-subway-flasher-even-weirder-than-you-thought](http://gawker.com/164750/new-york-mag-subway-flasher-even-weirder-than-you-thought) Yup, Dan Hoyt is a real piece of shit. ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/77 "2013-09-25T05:08:34Z")
> [@JKellyMap](#): > > For those that don’t want to follow the link: a U of Kansas journalism professor has been put on leave (I doubt he’ll lose his job) because he tweeted a pro-gun-control message in the aftermath of the Navy Yard killings, a tweet which implied a desire for harm on NRA members and which invoked God. Here’s the excerpt of the tweet: > [@](#): > > The professor tweeted Monday that “blood is on the hands” of the National Rifle Association. “Next time, let it be YOUR sons and daughters,” the tweet read. “Shame on you. May God damn you.” That ain’t no “implied” “pro-gun-control message”. It’s “Kill the NRA’s kids!” > [@JKellyMap](#): > > Not to get political in this thread…but the issue here is more about conservative Kansas state legislators looking for reasons to defund higher education. Real good job NOT getting political. That asshat is handing them reasons on a silver platter. And I agree with them. This idiot has no business in a classroom. And a system which allows people like him in should be radically reformed. ---
**Author:** ![user\_hostile](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/user_hostile/32/474_2.png) [@user\_hostile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/user_hostile)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/78 "2013-09-25T05:10:40Z")
> [@DummyGladHands](#): > > I knew a guy who used the same screen name for every message board he belonged to-cars, astronomy, antique cameras, stock & futures, people of 1/2 native American heritage, widowers, weather spotters etc. Someone who took offense at something he said on one of them, stalked thru his screen name all of his posts on all of the various boards, and found out way too much about him, to the point that he really did cause him some financial and legal problems. That was kind of the reason I picked mine. I figured a Google search would push it pages and pages in before the handle popped up. So far, so good…:dubious: ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/79 "2013-09-25T06:32:23Z")
> [@Agent\_Foxtrot](#): > > HR managers aren’t exactly known for their sense of humor. Oi, on behalf of all HR Managers, I resemble that remark.😛 ---
**Author:** ![longPath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bb73d2/32.png) [@longPath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/longPath)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 10:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415/80 "2013-09-25T10:20:54Z")
This has been getting a lot of attention here: > **[National Post](https://nationalpost.com/category/news/)** > > Read the latest breaking news in Canada and the rest of the world. We bring all of today's top headlines and stories to your fingertips. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stories-about-how-what-a-person-did-on-the-internet-ruined-their-lives/669415.md?page=5)