# "Straight Dope Message Board To Be Shut Down and Replaced with Google Engine." **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 7, 2002, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784 "2002-11-07T21:57:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/1 "2002-11-07T21:57:18Z")
CHICAGO,IL – After much consideration by the Straight Dope staff, it has been decided that the Straight Dope Message Board is to be shut down and replaced by a Google Engine. The “Straight Dope” is a newspaper column that has been in print since 1973 and is written by one “Cecil Adams”. It’s mission, “To Fight Ignorance”. For years, folks have written in to Cecil to answer their tough and mind bending questions, and their answers, if they were answered, were posted in the Chicago Reader. As time passed, and an electronic message board was put in place where fans of Cecil could ask and answer each others questions. But all this has now ended. “It wasn’t a hard decision to make,” a board administrator commented, “we wanted to cut costs, and to save our members some time while looking to have their questions answered. Besides, our own message board members agree that Google is much smarter than they are. They always tell others members to go there when they have asked a question, after all.” ## The details of this board closure are publicly available on the internet. Where might you find them? Do a Google search… (Originally posted in my LJ, and yes, it was written by me.) ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/2 "2002-11-07T22:14:40Z")
Er, the hell you are what about talking? Is this a rant about people who say “Google is your friend” in response to a question? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/3 "2002-11-07T22:30:48Z")
Nah, it’s humor. At least, I thought it was funny, and I’m reasonably sure that **Kwyjibo** intended the humor I found. ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/4 "2002-11-07T22:47:24Z")
Huh. Whoosh on me then. (I still don’t get it.) ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/5 "2002-11-07T22:56:03Z")
I guess it’s supposed to be funny…sorry Kwy, just doesn’t work. You didn’t mention a duck once! ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/6 "2002-11-07T23:15:48Z")
Why a Duck? Oh wait, he posts here. Unless that’s a female. Heck, I found it funny. Good to see humor about the subject, as it’s a pretty sore one around here with some people. Right, **RT**? ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/7 "2002-11-07T23:28:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ferrous \* > \*\*Er, the hell you are what about talking? > > Is this a rant about people who say “Google is your friend” in response to a question? > > 😕 \*\* No it’s not a rant, nor was it meant that way. 🙂 It’s purly satirical. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2002, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/8 "2002-11-07T23:32:48Z")
You fools - its a [plot](http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=straightdope+shut+down&btnG=Google+Search) . ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2002, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/9 "2002-11-08T16:54:12Z")
I found it funny. Even before my morning coffee. See? I’m smiling. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2002, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/10 "2002-11-08T17:00:02Z")
I found it funny. Even before my morning coffee. See? I’m smiling. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![psiekier](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/psiekier/32/116_2.png) [@psiekier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psiekier)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2002, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/11 "2002-11-08T20:16:38Z")
> [@](#): > > _Ferrous railed:_ > **Huh. Whoosh on me then. (I still don’t get it.)** You don’t read [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com/) very often, do you, **Ferrous**? It’s a satire piece made to resemble an actual press release in which the Chicago Reader staff announce the closing of the message board partly because it’s cheaper, but mostly because most of the questions asked of the Straight Dope these days could have been answered with a very simple Google search. ---
**Author:** ![Ferrous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2002, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/12 "2002-11-08T20:37:17Z")
Actually, no, I don’t read it at all unless someone posts a link to it from here. And thanks, but I understood _what_ my man **Kwyjibo** was going for, I just didn’t get why it was supposed to be funny. And really, “railed”? I was just confused, is all. (If I’m railing, you’ll know it.) I was just asking a simple question, I’m not pissed or anything. Sheesh, can’t a guy get whooshed without someone jumping down his throat? ---
**Author:** ![CRorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CRorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CRorex)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2002, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/13 "2002-11-08T22:01:35Z")
Well, Richard Gere will be happy now that the gerbils will be having more ‘FREE’ time. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2002, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/14 "2002-11-08T23:19:08Z")
I didn’t find it one bit funny, for a split second I thought it was true :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Hamadryad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6de8d8/32.png) [@Hamadryad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamadryad)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2002, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/15 "2002-11-09T15:26:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by World Eater \* > \*\*I didn’t find it one bit funny, for a split second I thought it was true :eek: \*\* Seeing as how it’s in MPSIMS and not ATMB, that seems rather thoughtless. And: Ha!!! ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2002, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/16 "2002-11-10T00:42:57Z")
Hamsters and gerbils aren’t the same thing, **CDrorex**. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2002, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/17 "2002-11-10T09:06:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dantheman \* > \*\*Why a Duck? Oh wait, he posts here. Unless that’s a female. > > Heck, I found it funny. Good to see humor about the subject, as it’s a pretty sore one around here with some people. Right, **RT**? \*\* **Why A Duck** is indeed a male, **dantheman**. 🙂 I certainly found it funny, and in no way attached seriousness to it at all. F\_X ---
**Author:** ![ElwoodCuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/edb3f5/32.png) [@ElwoodCuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElwoodCuse)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2002, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/18 "2002-11-11T07:01:37Z")
't ain’t funny, McGee. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2002, 10:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/19 "2002-11-11T10:48:05Z")
'tis! ---
**Author:** ![Stana\_Claus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stana_claus/32/13874_2.png) [@Stana\_Claus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stana_Claus)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2002, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784/20 "2002-11-11T21:08:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kat \* > \*\*Hamsters and gerbils aren’t the same thing, **CDrorex**. 😉 \*\* That’s right. Gerbils are the ones with the long hairy tails, [Big Bad Wolf voice]“All the better to retrieve them with, my dear!” [/BBWV] [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-dope-message-board-to-be-shut-down-and-replaced-with-google-engine/135784.md?page=2)