# Straight guys: support gay marriage or we'll marry your girlfriends **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 14, 2012, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021 "2012-11-14T20:07:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2012, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/21 "2012-11-17T16:57:58Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > So wait, let me see if I’ve got this right. You’re going to take them off our hands, financially support them, go to see fabulous shows and chick-flicks, put up with the mood swings, listen to the endless me-centred wittering and actually enjoy the reality TV shows, shoe shopping, diet plans and celebrity gossip? In short, the only time we get to see them is when they’re desperate for a dose of cock from someone who isn’t physically nauseated by the sight, smell and touch of their boobs and pussies? > > …And you’re selling this as a _threat_? :dubious: This needs to be posted on the Facebook wall of everyone who has shared this video. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2012, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/22 "2012-11-17T17:04:57Z")
> [@Justin\_Bailey](#): > > This needs to be posted on the Facebook wall of everyone who has shared this video. Why? It’s completely wrong, and insulting to gay AND straight men. Unless you’re saying the only time you ever want to spend with your wife is fucking her, in which case…uh, okay…I suspect she won’t be your wife for long after reading that on your Facebook… ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2012, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/23 "2012-11-17T17:32:24Z")
> [@Cliffy](#): > > So let me get this straight. You’re telling women they need to vote to maintain a discriminatory regime because her only hope is to marry a guy who _desparately_ wants to bone other dudes, but he has to settle for a woman because that’s the only choice he’s got? Yowza. Ah, but look at the alternative. Look at it from a guy’s perspective. If \*\*women \*\*aren’t allowed to marry other women, then instead of wild, premature-ejaculation-free sex with the firm, supple body of another woman who they are actually attracted to, after spending an hour together in a hot tub soaping each other up and then with the wet slippery Nuru oil massages… \*I’m sorry, what was I talking about? Oh yes. \*:o Instead of that, they’ll get to marry me, a dude. And eventually, out of sheer loneliness and a desire for human companionship, they’ll convince themselves that that whole lesbian thing was just a phase. And then I’ll get the sexy sex! Right? Right? Because after all, if I can’t even attract straight women, then you knows I’m gonna get some \*lesbian \*sex out of the deal somehow. That’s not laughably optimistic, amirite? This is what is going through the mind of hopelessly religious men in their never-ending quest to avoid reality through belief in fantasy. One minor problem with their plan… Well, one of many: They’re forgetting that while lesbians can’t get married, they can still have sex with each other. So it’s a combination of this ridiculous optimism that somehow there will be more women available for men to date, plus the idea that no man anywhere will ever be able to marry another dude, and therefore, consummate the relationship in a way that makes straight dudes run as far away as humanly possible, that drives the straight male vote to deny gay marriage. You get women on board by appealing to religious values, if they’re religious. Maybe there’s a also small part of their brains that thinks “gosh, maybe I could turn that handsome altar boy straight…” I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way. But in defiance of reality, these fears, naive fantasies, religious values, and general spite stand in the way of gay marriage. Sort of a “If I can’t be happy, no one can!” worldview. That’s the lizard brain at work. I’m no better. Sure, I’m an evolved, modern guy. But maybe my support of gay marriage is to show women how sensitive and understanding I am. Which will, in turn, lead to more sex. That’s the \*smarter \*lizard brain, but it’s still a bit reptilian of me. Ladies. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2012, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/24 "2012-11-17T17:52:08Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Why? It’s completely wrong, and insulting to gay AND straight men. > > Unless you’re saying the only time you ever want to spend with your wife is fucking her, in which case…uh, okay…I suspect she won’t be your wife for long after reading that on your Facebook… It’s not on my Facebook, and my wife doesn’t read Facebook, and I didn’t say I only wanted to see my wife three times a year for like five minutes at a time, I was just saying it was mighty white of the gays to volunteer for all of the downsides of marriage without the fun parts, which, y’know, I guess we straights would just have to pick up for them after all. Insulting, perhaps, but I think I speak for all of us who’re tired of being called uncultured Neanderthal slobs compared to those godlike gays. ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2012, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/25 "2012-11-17T17:57:49Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Why? It’s completely wrong, and insulting to gay AND straight men. > > Unless you’re saying the only time you ever want to spend with your wife is fucking her, in which case…uh, okay…I suspect she won’t be your wife for long after reading that on your Facebook… You caught me. My joke answer to a joke video clearly proves that I’m an evil gay-hating, woman-hating bastard. Or maybe it was… ya know… a joke. ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2012, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/26 "2012-11-17T20:40:16Z")
There will be \*no joking \*on the internet! It is for serious business only. And pictures of cats. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2012, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/27 "2012-11-17T21:34:43Z")
I’m so ashamed [Apology](http://legal-aware.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/cats.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2012, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/28 "2012-11-17T22:07:10Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > I’m so ashamed > > [Apology](http://legal-aware.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/cats.jpg) Man, those are some _fine_ pussies. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2012, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/29 "2012-11-18T13:39:57Z")
> [@Sailboat](#): > > Man, those are some _fine_ pussies. And legal too, if the site name’s anything to go by! ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2012, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021/30 "2012-11-18T13:47:21Z")
> [@Malacandra](#): > > So wait, let me see if I’ve got this right. You’re going to take them off our hands, financially support them, go to see fabulous shows and chick-flicks, put up with the mood swings, listen to the endless me-centred wittering and actually enjoy the reality TV shows, shoe shopping, diet plans and celebrity gossip? In short, the only time we get to see them is when they’re desperate for a dose of cock from someone who isn’t physically nauseated by the sight, smell and touch of their boobs and pussies? > > …And you’re selling this as a _threat_? :dubious: Ha ha… +1 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-guys-support-gay-marriage-or-well-marry-your-girlfriends/641021.md?page=1)