# Straight Males and Homosexual Experimentation **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 22, 2003, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095 "2003-07-22T05:32:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/61 "2010-12-22T05:58:22Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > Weren’t Kinsey’s statistics skewed because of the groups of men he interviewed? I read that many of the men he drew his stats from were convicts or people generally from the lower rungs of society, who were more likely to experience ‘situational’ homosexuality out of necessity than most men. According to [these guys](http://www.academia.org/kinsey-confidential/) recently it was worse than just selecting even random prisoners. There is plenty of research that indicates that 6% or less of most western populations have any homosexual experiences. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 8:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/62 "2010-12-22T08:23:56Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > According to [these guys](http://www.academia.org/kinsey-confidential/) recently it was worse than just selecting even random prisoners. There is plenty of research that indicates that 6% or less of most western populations have any homosexual experiences. Well, those guys are an right wing organization devoted to combating what they call liberal bias as liberal or communist indoctrination, and supporting the rights of politically conservative students & faculty, especially encouraging students to inform on liberally-biased professors. That’s hardly what you would call a neutral source. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/63 "2010-12-22T11:10:21Z")
I don’t doubt that a lot of straight men (more than would admit to it) would accept a BJ from a gay guy but how many would return the favor? And if the favor isn’t returned, what is the gay guy’s motivation in providing the BJ, especially if he knows in advance that the favor will not be returned? This assumes that the two people involved are strangers or at best acquaintances. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/64 "2010-12-22T11:20:50Z")
> [@LouisB](#): > > I don’t doubt that a lot of straight men (more than would admit to it) would accept a BJ from a gay guy but how many would return the favor? And if the favor isn’t returned, what is the gay guy’s motivation in providing the BJ, especially if he knows in advance that the favor will not be returned? This assumes that the two people involved are strangers or at best acquaintances. About 5 years ago I was very sick and took months to recover. Bored, I surfed the net and for a while was fascinated with Craigslist personals. I had a few eye-openers, but much of it was pretty ordinary sex. To answer your question, there were (and probably still are) many many ads for men offering sex - usually oral - to other men with no reciprocation. Apparently some men just get turned-on going down on other men. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/65 "2010-12-22T11:31:52Z")
> [@LouisB](#): > > I don’t doubt that a lot of straight men (more than would admit to it) would accept a BJ from a gay guy but how many would return the favor? And if the favor isn’t returned, what is the gay guy’s motivation in providing the BJ, especially if he knows in advance that the favor will not be returned? This assumes that the two people involved are strangers or at best acquaintances. If Sofia Vergara requested cunnilingus from me, but made it perfectly clear that she would not reciprocate in any way, I imagine I’d be game. I wouldn’t want this as my exclusive outlet, but I sure wouldn’t turn it down, and I imagine I’m not alone in this. You can extrapolate from there. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/66 "2010-12-22T12:25:01Z")
Straight male, never experimented, never tempted. I have been propositioned by men (which I found flattering) and been assumed to be gay (whcih I found amusing) but barring long-term incarceration I can’t envision ever being that interested. (And being married, other women are out of the question for the duration as well.) Also, I’m enough of a lightweight that after six beers I’d be unconscious or puking and in no mood for hanky-panky of any sort. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/67 "2010-12-22T12:41:39Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > Well, those guys are an right wing organization devoted to combating what they call liberal bias as liberal or communist indoctrination, and supporting the rights of politically conservative students & faculty, especially encouraging students to inform on liberally-biased professors. That’s hardly what you would call a neutral source. Yeah, but find me a cite where anyone refutes the international studies. It is certainly unfortunate that the first people to refute the status quo are ideologues, but that doesn’t mean they are wrong. Find me a bunch of cites where Kinsey workers deny the statements in the article I linked to, and I will reconsider how unscientific Kinsey was. Even the Kinsey Institute admits that the population tested was not representative. ---
**Author:** ![Crafter\_Man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crafter_man/32/458_2.png) [@Crafter\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crafter_Man)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/68 "2010-12-22T12:54:28Z")
> [@Ooner](#): > > Have you ever had sexual contact with another male No. I’m 100% hetero. Always have been. Never felt the slightest sexual attraction to a male. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/69 "2010-12-22T14:56:22Z")
Striaght male. Never had the urge to experiment. It appeals to me about as much as wanting to experiment with my dog. Just some place I’ll never go no matter how drunk or horny. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/70 "2010-12-22T14:57:53Z")
Does anyone else find it odd that about half of the posts in this thread are people feeling it necessary to say how completely straight they are? ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/71 "2010-12-22T14:58:31Z")
> [@Hampshire](#): > > It appeals to me about as much as wanting to experiment with my dog. Not the best analogy you might have used, considering. > [@Illuminatiprimus](#): > > Does anyone else find it odd that about half of the posts in this thread are people feeling it necessary to say how completely straight they are? Not really. If you have any social sciences exposure, you hear the “most men have had some homosexual contact” trope ad infinitum. If this isn’t true for you and someone opens up a thread on the subject, the inclination is to speak up. And honestly, my lack of homosexual contact is probably a function of very little social contact of \*any \*sort through childhood and adolecence. I didn’t play much, so sex play just wasn’t on the table. ---
**Author:** ![Grumman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/43a26b/32.png) [@Grumman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grumman)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/72 "2010-12-22T15:01:02Z")
> [@StusBlues](#): > > If Sofia Vergara requested cunnilingus from me, but made it perfectly clear that she would not reciprocate in any way, I imagine I’d be game. > > I wouldn’t want this as my exclusive outlet, but I sure wouldn’t turn it down, and I imagine I’m not alone in this. You’re not. As I see it, helping a nice girl get off is its own reward. > [@Illuminatiprimus](#): > > Does anyone else find it odd that about half of the posts in this thread are people feeling it necessary to say how completely straight they are? Not at all. The OP was asking a question of self-identifying “straight” guys. If the only people who responded were self-identifying “straight” guys who _had_ experimented, it would give a completely skewed view of the truth. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/73 "2010-12-22T15:06:16Z")
> [@Illuminatiprimus](#): > > Does anyone else find it odd that about half of the posts in this thread are people feeling it necessary to say how completely straight they are? The OP, old as it is, is asking if males have ever experimented and how common it is. “No, I never have and have no interest” seems as valid an answer as “No, but I would be willing”. I suppose only the ones who have or would could answer and then we’d know that 100% of men have had sexual encounters with other men or would be willing to do so. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/74 "2010-12-22T15:27:46Z")
> [@StusBlues](#): > > If Sofia Vergara requested cunnilingus from me, but made it perfectly clear that she would not reciprocate in any way, I imagine I’d be game. > > I wouldn’t want this as my exclusive outlet, but I sure wouldn’t turn it down, and I imagine I’m not alone in this. > > You can extrapolate from there. I can only extrapolate from my own perspective and I wouldn’t perform cunnilingus on a stranger without any reciprocity although your example is a beautiful woman. For an SO, yes I would, no question. For a stranger, again, no. I just don’t see the benefit for the gay man to give the straight man a BJ and expect nothing in return. But I don’t have to, now do I? ---
**Author:** ![Peeta\_Mellark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bc8723/32.png) [@Peeta\_Mellark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peeta_Mellark)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/75 "2010-12-22T16:02:03Z")
Well, Mr. **TFK1234** , you haven’t been back since your one and only post, but on the off chance you _do_ come back I suppose a direct response to your post is warranted. > [@TFK1234](#): > > This happened a few days ago. let me give some background first though. i am 18 years old. i have always considered myself straight. i have had sex with girls before and enjoyed it. i have a friend who is openly gay, 21. i have been friends with him, his brother 19, and another one of our friends who is straight, also my roommate, 20, for almost 5 years now. me, my gay friend and our friend who is straight desided to get drunk at my straight friends house. so we get drunk and my straight friend passes out on his couch. i dont remember what happened or what lead to it but my gay friend ends up giving me a blow job. i remember telling him “i need a girl to make me go” but he didnt stop and i didnt protest. i think we had sex as well, but nothing went near my behind. You _think_ you had sex? First off, you did. A blow job is sex. That’s why it’s called “oral sex” and not “oral happy funtime.” If you’re talking about intercourse of some sort, is this in the denial realm of “oh man, I was SO WASTED _wink wink_ I don’t remember ANYTHING that I did last night _nudge nudge_” or were you honestly so drunk you can’t remember? Be honest with yourself if not with anyone else. If this is just regret talking and you’d rather not face what happened, then chill out. You’re young and horny and you did something to get off. If you honestly don’t remember and were too drunk to be aware of what’s going on, then that’s something else entirely and has jack all to do with it being gay. Did your gay friend do things that you did not want to do and you were too drunk to stop, or were you just drunk enough that your concern about it being another guy wasn’t that strong? There’s a pretty huge and important distinction there. > [@](#): > > i have suspected he had a crush on me for some time now. i dont know why i let it happend. now everytime i think about it i get sick to my stomach, and i barffed once because it truely grossed me out. what is worse is the 4 of us hang out almost every day. it has been extremely awkward now…i cant even look at my gay friend. today i told him i dont think we can be friend anymore. i dont know how im going ot get out of telling my straight friend and my gay friends brother why all of a sudden me and the gay friend are no longer friends. the thing that has bothered me the most is one day im going to be faced with a decision to tell my wife that once when i was younger i experimented with another man. i have a horible feeling just retelling the story on here. Why do you feel so horrible? Is it because you’re disgusted that you did something with a man, or do you feel that you were made to do something you didn’t want to do? In either case, you shouldn’t feel horrible or bad about yourself. In my experience, it’s a pretty common scenario where a guy says he’s straight, gets wasted with a gay friend and just “accidentally” has gay sex. Then he pretends he doesn’t remember, but continues getting drunk and “accidentally” having gay sex, until in some cases he comes to grips with the fact that he actually enjoys gay sex. In other cases, that never happens and he writes it off as experimenting, or a drunken mistake. Hearing “I was so drunk I can’t remember anything” from a “straight” guy you gave a blow job to the night before is one of the grand cliches of my generation. You don’t have to tell your future wife. You don’t have to tell anyone. Unless someone is particularly homophobic, chances are they don’t care and don’t want to hear it. Do you also plan on telling your future wife about that time when you were fourteen and stuck your penis between your mattress and your box spring? Or that time you were making out and came on the girl’s leg? Or whatever other stupid, horny things you did in your life? Trust me, nobody wants to hear it. Your future marriage is better off without a recitation of your penis regrets. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/76 "2010-12-22T16:16:28Z")
If it was called “oral happy funtime” I’d be into it _so_ much more. ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/77 "2010-12-22T17:54:31Z")
I have considered experimenting with gay sex the same number of times I’ve wanted to have with sex with camels - zero. I can’t understand what anyone, women included, find attractive in men. I am just thankful that the phenomenon exists. ---
**Author:** ![gurujulp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ba9def/32.png) [@gurujulp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gurujulp)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/78 "2010-12-22T18:47:50Z")
> [@shiftless](#): > > I have considered experimenting with gay sex the same number of times I’ve wanted to have with sex with camels - zero. I can’t understand what anyone, women included, find attractive in men. I am just thankful that the phenomenon exists. I don’t know why anyone finds men attractive… But I have kissed a few men in my lifetime, quite long ago, at parties, where everyone was kissing everyone. It just didn’t have the spark that kissing most women provides, but I have kissed women where that spark did not exist as well… Nothing beyond kissing, although I have seriously considered it. It seems that the sex part would be so much easier if I was into men- just go out and get picked up! I have certainly been propositioned enough to wish I was gay. Women don’t proposition that way. But I am with an SO whom I expect to be with for quite a long time, if not forever, so it doesn’t really matter at this point. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/79 "2010-12-22T19:31:41Z")
Hetero male here. My first reaction to the OP was along the lines of “Nope, never, no way.” Then I remembered that time in college when I, my male roommate, and a very willing girl spent a depraved weekend locked inside our dorm room. While he and I didn’t actually do anything to each other, there was plenty of incidental contact, and at least one instance of, um, sharing an orifice. I’m not sure if that counts as homosexual experimentation or not, but there you have it. I’ve never regretted that weekend and (though it’s highly unlikely at this point in my life) I wouldn’t be closed to trying something like that again. However, without the girl present it certainly wouldn’t have happened, and I can definitely say I’ve never been tempted to try anything one-on-one with a guy. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095/80 "2010-12-22T19:41:53Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > While he and I didn’t actually do anything to each other, there was plenty of incidental contact, and at least one instance of, um, sharing an orifice. I’m not sure if that counts as homosexual experimentation or not, but there you have it. It would be gay if you’d engineered the entire scenario JUST to share an orifice with him, but I don’t think putting your dick in a woman’s orifice is particularly gay (even if there’s already another dick in there). Again, it’s not acts that are gay, it’s desires that are. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-males-and-homosexual-experimentation/190095.md?page=5)