# Straight people - does the notion of showering with a gay person bother you? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 1, 2012, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469 "2012-02-01T22:12:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/61 "2012-02-02T17:55:34Z")
Couldn’t care less. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/62 "2012-02-02T18:27:21Z")
> [@SanVito](#): > > Is this the shower situation in male changing rooms? Because in every gym I’ve belonged (in London) the women’s area always has separate shower cubicles. Conversely, the only places where I’ve seen showers without individual stalls have been two local “fancy” gyms. The gyms at schools and the changing rooms in public pools all have individual stalls. ---
**Author:** ![azraiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@azraiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/azraiel)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/63 "2012-02-02T19:19:11Z")
The issue wouldn’t be showering with gay men, it would be showering with other people. But given a choice, I’d rather shower with a host of gay men than with women. Because body issues, self-esteem, yadda yadda… Showering with men, I wouldn’t be attracted to them. I wouldn’t care if they found me repulsive, and would be flattered if someone found me attractive. Showering with any number of women, I would be sure to find one or more attractive. And also be certain that there would be no way said woman would be interested in my repulsive self. Probably because I fall squarely into a norm of gay sexuality but not hetero sexuality. I’m a tallish, strong, dark, and big guy. 6’0 farm boy between 205 and 280, depending on the life-phase you catch me in. Were I gay, I would be firmly ensconced in the bear camp. I’m aware that there are women who find my physiology attractive, but it’s not a type celebrated by mass media or hetero culture. My physiological type is front and center in gay culture, along with several others. I’ve never understood the unease a lot of straight men have around gay men. First, you must have an ego to think you’re Og’s gift to gay men. Second, why in the hell would he be attracted to your nasty ass? The hubris is alien to me. FWIW, I’ve shared a bed with a gay man or more than one occasion. The first time was in high school, when the perverse debate coach roomed the two smokers in the only non-smoking room. It had a single bed. Do you know what happened that night? We lay awake talking–he about the boy who’d just broken his heart, and me about the girl who’d just done the same to me. tl;dr Straight dudes need to get over themselves ---
**Author:** ![azraiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@azraiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/azraiel)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/64 "2012-02-02T19:36:30Z")
Typo, or Freudian slip? You be the judge. Was it meant to read “I’ve shared a bed with a gay man or more on occasion,” or “I’ve shared a bed with a gay man on more than one occasion”? The latter, for the record. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/65 "2012-02-02T20:27:57Z")
> [@azraiel](#): > > Showering with any number of women, I would be sure to find one or more attractive. > > Straight dudes need to get over themselves See, that’s the whole point. What is the difference between a straight dude feeling a little uneasy about showering with gay guys, as opposed to a straight guy showering with women? You said yourself, that due to body esteem issues, you might feel a little uneasy about showering with persons of the opposite sex. And, like you said, you as a straight guy might find a woman attractive, which might be uncomfortable. Why would a gay guy not feel a little odd about finding his straight shower mates a little hot? ---
**Author:** ![polar\_bear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@polar\_bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/polar_bear)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/66 "2012-02-02T20:35:08Z")
I got over being embaressed about showering with other man, sometime ine elementary school. Nowadays I quit often find myself sharing hottubs/showers/swimmingpools with a number of nude men and women (few gay men though), and I don’t give it a second thought. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/67 "2012-02-02T20:52:41Z")
I picked “other” because I’m one of the “I wouldn’t shower with anybody else unless absolutely necessary” crowd. If I were to do so, however, I don’t care about the orientation of the fellow showerees. As long as we’re all the same gender, what’s the difference? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/68 "2012-02-02T21:10:41Z")
> [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > The idea of showering with other people of _any_ persuasion bothers me. I don’t think them being attracted to me would make it any worse. Word. ---
**Author:** ![Laggard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de053/32.png) [@Laggard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Laggard)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/69 "2012-02-02T21:16:25Z")
> [@TreacherousCretin](#): > > Couldn’t care less. Yeah. I’m a bit surprised how many people have a hang-up about showering with others. BTW, I go to three different YWCA locations here and not one of them has private showers. ---
**Author:** ![maggenpye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecc23a/32.png) [@maggenpye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/maggenpye)\ **Post date:** [February 2, 2012, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469/70 "2012-02-02T21:46:51Z")
No problem here. Like someone else said upthread - it’s not a sexual situation. At least not for me, though I can completely understand why \*\*shiftless \*\*would have a very different viewpoint. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-people-does-the-notion-of-showering-with-a-gay-person-bother-you/611469.md?page=3)