# Straight women: Do you believe that straight men are easy to seduce? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 15, 2018, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440 "2018-04-15T03:17:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/41 "2018-04-16T15:26:47Z")
> [@Pantastic](#): > > If you offer someone a lot of money to do something they would like to do anyway, I’m not sure that it actually counts as ‘seduction’ of any sort. That is missing my point and misinterpreting the analogy. My point is that in many situations, men and women are analogous to job-seekers and employers, in the sense that men want something and women have it to offer. So a woman is typically in a position of advantage in the way that an employer is in a position of advantage vis-a-vis a job seeker. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/42 "2018-04-16T15:57:17Z")
Curious thread. You’d almost think men were a morally and aesthetically diverse bunch who have strong sex drives they can generally keep in check. > [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > Yeah, I don’t think everyone in this thread is on the same page about what it means to **seduce** someone. Anybody want to try offering a working definition? How about: persuading a guy to behave significantly less cautiously than he otherwise would? That way it doesn’t have to involve home-wrecking immorality. Example: no fun time with coworkers, no fun time with someone on rebound, no fun time while on rebound. My current bride persuaded me to set these three aside, but nearly ran me off instead (I’m skittish when a deal appears to be weighted in my favor). She wore me down. 10 years on I’m still wondering what her angle is. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/43 "2018-04-16T16:28:48Z")
> [@Pantastic](#): > > And your claim of easy ‘seduction’ doesn’t seem to match very well with the reality that female friends of mine have experienced. I know a number of women who experimented with making first contact on dating/hookup sites, and found that it puts the majority of men off enough that the contact goes nowhere. There simply are a huge chunk of men who will not say yes if a woman makes the first contact. How do they know that it was the first contact that was putting them off? Maybe the guys that they contacted just didn’t fancy them for whatever reason. Obviously you’re going to have a better success rate connecting with men who’ve already expressed an interest than with those who haven’t. I think more women should make first contact like that. If it works, great; and if it doesn’t they’ll have a better understanding of what guys go through having to make the first move all the time. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/44 "2018-04-16T18:03:41Z")
I think it was the Stasi and the KGB which discovered that men were difficult to seduce while women could be had easily. ---
**Author:** ![Aquadementia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aquadementia/32/555_2.png) [@Aquadementia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aquadementia)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/45 "2018-04-16T18:42:57Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > Yeah, I don’t think everyone in this thread is on the same page about what it means to **seduce** someone. Anybody want to try offering a working definition? If it’s accepting a serving of peach cobbler then it takes virtually no effort to seduce me. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/46 "2018-04-17T01:35:30Z")
I’d like to hear from the OP on what exactly he and his step daughter defined as seduction. As many others have pointed out, the average guy is much more likely to accept casual sex. That can hardly be a secret. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/47 "2018-04-17T02:23:11Z")
> [@PastTense](#): > > Then there are the guys who are totally oblivious that women are sexually interested in them. And then there are the guys who are painfully aware that women are rarely interested in them. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/48 "2018-04-17T13:58:48Z")
> [@Velocity](#): > > That is missing my point and misinterpreting the analogy. My point is that in many situations, men and women are analogous to job-seekers and employers, in the sense that men want something and women have it to offer. So a woman is typically in a position of advantage in the way that an employer is in a position of advantage vis-a-vis a job seeker. I’m not misinterpreting the analogy at all, it’s just a bad analogy if we’re talking about ‘seduction’ and ‘straight men’. As you just pointed out, you’re analogizing the pool of “all straight men” to “job-seekers who have been out of work for some time and are in dire need of money to survive and are qualified for the job being offered”, but that’s not a good analogy. As I pointed out earlier, there are straight men who (following the analogy) ‘already have a job’, ‘aren’t interested in this job’, ‘aren’t qualified for this job’, ‘would rather apply for the job and fantasize about getting it but just stay home rather than actually go interview for the job’, and so on. The analogy really only works for something like ‘straight guys who haven’t gotten laid for some time, want casual sex in the style she’s offering, find this particular person attractive, aren’t in a relationship,’ but the original claim is that a woman can easily seduce “a man she desires” and doesn’t put those rather severe limitations on the pool. And again, just offering something people want and having some of them take it doesn’t count as seduction, and the fact that some people will take it certainly doesn’t mean that I can getIf I go to a party with a couple of pepperoni pizzas, open them up, and say ‘hey, who wants pizza’, odds are the pizza will be gone quickly. But I don’t think it’s appropriate to say that I seduced anyone into eating pizza. Further, there will be party-goers who aren’t interested in the pizza - lactose intolerant guy can’t eat cheese, vegetarian guy won’t eat meat, guy who just ate an hour ago isn’t hungry, healthy diet guy won’t leave his food plan, and so on. So even though I can empty my pizza boxes at the party, I can’t easily seduce anyone I want into eating pizza. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/49 "2018-04-17T14:05:59Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > How do they know that it was the first contact that was putting them off? Maybe the guys that they contacted just didn’t fancy them for whatever reason. Obviously you’re going to have a better success rate connecting with men who’ve already expressed an interest than with those who haven’t. Well, responses like ‘what the hell is wrong with you that you’re making the first move’ make it pretty obvious that making the first move put the guy off, and there are a bunch of those. And women are actually capable of analyzing data, like comparing the results of ‘contacted the guy but waited for him to actually ask to do anything’ to ‘contacted the guy and went ahead and asked him out’. > [@](#): > > I think more women should make first contact like that. If it works, great; and if it doesn’t they’ll have a better understanding of what guys go through having to make the first move all the time. Have you ever actually talked to a female friend about their dating experiences? ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/50 "2018-04-17T14:07:03Z")
> [@Pantastic](#): > > and the fact that some people will take it certainly doesn’t > mean that I can get missed the edit window, that should end with “that I can get anyone in the group to take it”. ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/51 "2018-04-17T15:04:03Z")
> [@PastTense](#): > > Then there are the guys who are totally oblivious that women are sexually interested in them. “Good choice, her clothes wouldn’t have fit you.” ---
**Author:** ![Emergency911](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/43a26b/32.png) [@Emergency911](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emergency911)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/52 "2018-04-17T15:16:36Z")
Maybe it’s just me, but you had me at ‘peach cobbler’. I’m yours!😉 ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/53 "2018-04-17T16:14:49Z")
> [@HoneyBadgerDC](#): > > An 80 year old woman can go out and get laid within a couple of hours if she sets her mind to it. I have lived in predominately military areass for some 33 or so years. In general it is easy for a woman to get laid at will simply by walking into a bar just off base and pretty much asking for it. This would of course be for a booty call, not any real relationship as an outcome, though it is not imposible to score a relationship when the right conditions hsppen, lonely and horny young freshly enlisted guys respond to the attention. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/54 "2018-04-17T18:54:52Z")
> [@Pantastic](#): > > Well, responses like ‘what the hell is wrong with you that you’re making the first move’ make it pretty obvious that making the first move put the guy off, and there are a bunch of those. Some guys are assholes. If your friends had waited and done nothing, maybe these assholes would have contacted them first, or maybe not. I expect they still would be assholes, though. Whichever way they try it, doing something or doing nothing, you takes your chances. > [@](#): > > Have you ever actually talked to a female friend about their dating experiences? Yes, some. Why do you ask? ---
**Author:** ![Melbourne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5e925/32.png) [@Melbourne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Melbourne)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2018, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/55 "2018-04-18T01:37:53Z")
> [@AK84](#): > > I think it was the Stasi and the KGB which discovered that men were difficult to seduce while women could be had easily. There was a private detective agency / divorce facilitator here that reported than almost any man could be compromised by a younger and more attractive women. And almost any woman could be compromised by a richer and more powerful man. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2018, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/56 "2018-04-18T03:59:40Z")
> [@Melbourne](#): > > There was a private detective agency / divorce facilitator here that reported than almost any man could be compromised by a younger and more attractive women. And almost any woman could be compromised by a richer and more powerful man. Of course this is confirmation bias on their part. They are going to be looking at the subset of the population which they are paid to investigate and since there is already a suspicion by the part of their spouse/partner they aren’t going to be looking at the ones who can’t be “compromised.” When I was hanging around in bars for the better part of my 30s, there were a lot of unhappy wives there, but you don’t see the happy ones who never to go those places. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2018, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/57 "2018-04-18T14:00:11Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > Some guys are assholes. If your friends had waited and done nothing, maybe these assholes would have contacted them first, or maybe not. I expect they still would be assholes, though. That really seems like a dodge, but you seem to have definitively agreed with my point that it’s not trivially easy for a woman to pick up any guy, since different approaches have different non-zero failure rates. If it was actually trivially easy for a woman to pick up any straight man as the OP asserts, then there wouldn’t be a significant number of rejections, and the method of approach wouldn’t matter. Since that’s the only bit that’s germane to the OP, I’m just going to leave it at that. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2018, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/58 "2018-04-18T14:04:30Z")
> [@aruvqan](#): > > I have lived in predominately military areass for some 33 or so years. In general it is easy for a woman to get laid at will simply by walking into a bar just off base and pretty much asking for it. This would of course be for a booty call, not any real relationship as an outcome, though it is not imposible to score a relationship when the right conditions hsppen, lonely and horny young freshly enlisted guys respond to the attention. Again, this isn’t an example of a woman seducing _any_ straight man, which is what the OP asserts is easy. If it’s trivial for a woman to seduce any straight man, then all of the women in question should be able to pick the base commander and bang him specifically, with say a 90% success rate. That’s actually not trivial to do, especially if he’s married or worried about security issues with random hookups. ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2018, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/59 "2018-04-18T15:04:16Z")
> [@Pantastic](#): > > Again, this isn’t an example of a woman seducing _any_ straight man, which is what the OP asserts is easy. If it’s trivial for a woman to seduce any straight man, then all of the women in question should be able to pick the base commander and bang him specifically, with say a 90% success rate. That’s actually not trivial to do, especially if he’s married or worried about security issues with random hookups. You’re hyperanalyzing - if we were to take it to an extreme, then you might as well ask if Jane Doe Average Straight Woman can seduce Barack Obama or Bill Gates. I think the OP is just asking whether it is generally easy, generally speaking, for a woman to seduce a man, and especially as compared to a man trying to seduce a woman. ---
**Author:** ![Algher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Algher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algher)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2018, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440/60 "2018-04-18T15:24:44Z")
> [@PastTense](#): > > Then there are the guys who are totally oblivious that women are sexually interested in them. That was me in my single days - the concept of a woman seducing me was foreign. This led once to one of those conversations of “you know you could have had me that night?” from an old crush. Great Reddit thread on that topic: [Reddit - Dive into anything](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5g4t2u/guys_of_reddit_whats_the_biggest_hint_you_missed/) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/straight-women-do-you-believe-that-straight-men-are-easy-to-seduce/812440.md?page=4)