# struuter, take my hand...

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [December 12, 2000, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242 "2000-12-12T21:43:53Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 13\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![struuter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@struuter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/struuter)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2000, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/21 "2000-12-15T15:13:10Z")

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Ogre and super head, that is an enormous relief to me. I even did a search on you, super head, to see what I could see. After a little reading up on you, I figured you were having a laugh…

Good thing, too. As Ogre’s mentor I would have had to kick your…well, I would have asked you to explain. I hope any friend of Ogre’s is, at least, an aquaintance of mine?  
\<looks hopeful\>

Jester, I have some delicious knishes at home–will that be payment enough?

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2000, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/22 "2000-12-15T15:31:50Z")

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**struuter** , pass him a beer and he’s like a puppy.

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**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2000, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/23 "2000-12-15T16:11:44Z")

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Well, ma’am, knish’s are fine and good, but the trugth be told, I’m in the market for a new apartment, and landlords don’t take well to breakfast foodstuffs.

So, I guess it’s off to the station with you. Get in the car. No, don’t worry, it won’t ruin your date. Just think of it as a limo! Look, you’re both in the back, and I’m up front, like a chauffer! It’s practically the same thing!

…

Okay, look, **Ogre** , I’ll be straight with ya. If you don’t get in the car, I’m gonna be forced to open up a fresh can of police brutality on your ass, and I don’t wanna ruin that nice tux.

There, I thought you’d come around. Now, everybody in? Good. Off to La Estacion, no? See, even “the station” sounds fancy when you speak in spanish. Ruining the mood, my ass.😃

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2000, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/24 "2000-12-15T16:19:46Z")

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Dammit, it’s very difficult to exchange calf-eyed looks when you’re trussed up in the back of a police cruiser. You know, **Jester** , it smells kinda funny back here. Who did you haul in before us? I think I’m sitting in something…

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**Author:** ![struuter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@struuter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/struuter)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2000, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/25 "2000-12-15T16:43:19Z")

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Okay…okay. I can see that if I want my date to go properly, I’m going to have to take charge of this situation.

J., here’s a fifty. \<stuffs a crumpled bill in his hand\> This oughta help. If not, you can crash at my place until you find a flat.

Also…what exactly would we be charged with? We’ve both still got our clothes on (operative word being ‘still’), and I don’t know how the officers down at the station would take to your wearing that uniform with those shoes on…I don’t think police uniform shoes have little bells on them.  
But…do what you must.

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**Author:** ![super\_head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d6d6ee/32.png) [@super\_head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/super_head)\
**Post date:** [December 15, 2000, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/26 "2000-12-15T23:06:56Z")

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Sorry about the stuff I left in the back of the police cruiser, Ogre. Someone handed me a beer - and then several more - and next thing I knew I was a very sick puppy. I’m sure the stains will come out.

…soooo…

…and gosh, you get to go to Savannah while I’m stuck in New Hampshire (no offense to New Hampshire fans, of course).

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**Author:** ![struuter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@struuter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/struuter)\
**Post date:** [December 18, 2000, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/27 "2000-12-18T14:13:00Z")

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_sigh_ Not even a first virtual kiss and my date is locked in a police cruiser, sitting in vomit. Romantic, this is not.

Oh well, Ogre…you tried. And very nicely too. I’m proud of your gratuitous flirting. And I think most, if not every, lady here would be flattered to be the object of your attentions…the pre-cop/vomit stuff, of course.

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [December 18, 2000, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/28 "2000-12-18T22:53:43Z")

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Well, **struuter** , sorry for the thread winding out of control. Ain’t that always the way it happens.  
::::Wrapping my arms around **struuter** , I hold my long coat up over both of our faces for a long, long moment, so’s you voyeuristic types can’t tell what’s going on.::::

🙂

Ahhhhhh…

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**Author:** ![struuter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@struuter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/struuter)\
**Post date:** [December 18, 2000, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/29 "2000-12-18T22:57:15Z")

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_blush_  
🙂  
_blush_

Well now…I never…I mean…that was…um…  
Can we do that again?

Please?

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [December 20, 2000, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/30 "2000-12-20T05:14:09Z")

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…and for long, long minutes, this thread remains perfectly dark. Finally, the coat slides off, and I’m breathing hard, soaked to the skin (from the rain, you pervs), and smiling.

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**Author:** ![super\_head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d6d6ee/32.png) [@super\_head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/super_head)\
**Post date:** [December 20, 2000, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/31 "2000-12-20T05:30:18Z")

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…how the hell did I get under this coat? And why do I smell of Ogre?

Mommy!

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [December 20, 2000, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/32 "2000-12-20T05:31:36Z")

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You know you love it, Stud!

🙂

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**Author:** ![super\_head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d6d6ee/32.png) [@super\_head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/super_head)\
**Post date:** [December 20, 2000, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/struuter-take-my-hand/45242/33 "2000-12-20T05:33:28Z")

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Ah, you know me all too well.

What the hell am I talking about? Who are you?

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