# Student workers having sex in the library or Good God I HATE giving this speech all the time. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 17, 2016, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387 "2016-02-17T23:30:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/41 "2016-02-18T16:31:32Z")
This is what happens when youngsters get all Dewey-eyed. ---
**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/42 "2016-02-18T16:35:47Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Temporary or not, an on-campus job (i.e., no commute cost in time or money) that doesn’t require a work wardrobe or quite bluntly that strenuous of work (we are rather easy going compared to a gig at a fast food restaurant or retail hell) is rather valuable commodity on my campus. > > And another thing that really irritates me is these idiots (with the generous help of plenty of non-student worker library sex enthusiasts of course) are going to make our cubicle policies worse. Right now we have lovely largely, sound resistant study cubicles that students can rent and lock for several hours at a time. The cubicles have a giant glass panel on the door. A lot of people like to a hang a blanket or throw rug over that panel to make a really quiet isolated nest so they can really concentrate. Unfortunately, some people like to do that to use the study cubicle as a cheap motel. They (upper library management) are already talking about banning coverings on the door panel. There’s talk of getting rid of the locks. Bunch of prudes. I thought librarians were down for some spice. I know I’ve seen a movie or two about that. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/43 "2016-02-18T17:04:49Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > It’s a big campus. There are lots of hidden spaces, lots of restrooms on the top floors of multi-story buildings that are virtually empty after around 7:00 p.m. There’s a dormitory where guest are allowed 24-hours a day. Why the hell do these morons have to fool around in the library? It’s annoying and an arrest able offense. Okay, kids here’s a major lesson in the real world of work, you get caught having sex on the job, you get fired! Urgh! The freshmen are getting stupider every year. Sorry, just had to rant. Why don’t you give the speech when you \*hire \*the students? Just change one sentence to condtional: _if_ they do it, they get fired on the spot. You might not hate the speech as much if you’re giving it to clothed, relatively bodily-fluid-free listeners. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/44 "2016-02-18T18:00:24Z")
> [@bup](#): > > Why don’t you give the speech when you \*hire \*the students? Just change one sentence to condtional: _if_ they do it, they get fired on the spot. > > You might not hate the speech as much if you’re giving it to clothed, relatively bodily-fluid-free listeners. Seriously, I do. It’s the second speech on my orientation agenda. Right after explaining that they must actually show up for work in order to get paid. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/45 "2016-02-18T18:07:42Z")
Dang, I worked security for a small university and had to walk the libraries many times, mostly at night and after closing. Never once encountered anyone having sex. Encountered a couple making out in a room that was supposed to be locked. Told them I’d be back to lock it up in 10 minutes. They were gone when I came back. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/46 "2016-02-18T18:15:09Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > This is what happens when youngsters get all Dewey-eyed. _ **Groannnn!** _ ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/47 "2016-02-18T18:20:43Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > Don’t go so fast, then. National Lampoon photo-funny: Man to woman, both relaxing in bed: “Do you smoke after sex?” Woman lifts up sheet, right over her “petticoat junction” and then turns to smile at him as she says “Yes!” ---
**Author:** ![Algher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Algher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algher)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/48 "2016-02-18T19:00:07Z")
I was sad to learn that Stanford demolished Meyer library. While later on I learned that the stacks at Green were far more secluded, Meyer was the first location for me. I admit I did not work there, though. I might have drop a condom flower on the site of the former library when I go back for reunion. ---
**Author:** ![Dag\_Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@Dag\_Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dag_Otto)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/49 "2016-02-18T19:16:55Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > we are rather easy going Apparently you could improve in one respect. > [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Right after explaining that they must actually show up for work in order to get paid. Make that two. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/50 "2016-02-18T20:22:27Z")
You should tell them it’s too easy where you work, they don’t get any points unless they do it somewhere else. ---
**Author:** ![dasmoocher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dbc845/32.png) [@dasmoocher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dasmoocher)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/51 "2016-02-18T21:13:18Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Next thing she’ll be telling us that something other than sex is supposed to go on at college campuses. Drinking. And sometimes that’s combined with sex. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/52 "2016-02-18T21:14:25Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > …do it in the utility tunnels or something. Excellent advice! Doing in in the main tunnel vastly increases the chance of pregnancy. ---
**Author:** ![Southern\_Yankee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/southern_yankee/32/2800_2.png) [@Southern\_Yankee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Southern_Yankee)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/53 "2016-02-18T21:21:35Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > It’s a big campus. There are lots of hidden spaces, lots of restrooms on the top floors of multi-story buildings that are virtually empty after around 7:00 p.m. There’s a dormitory where guest are allowed 24-hours a day. Why the hell do these morons have to fool around in the library? It’s annoying and an arrest able offense. Okay, kids here’s a major lesson in the real world of work, you get caught having sex on the job, you get fired! Urgh! The freshmen are getting stupider every year. Sorry, just had to rant. Was this _real_ sex, or just people introducing themselves to each other with sex hand shakes? ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/54 "2016-02-18T21:59:54Z")
People should never have sex in the library. The library is for smoking weed. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/55 "2016-02-18T22:25:59Z")
> [@Southern\_Yankee](#): > > Was this _real_ sex, or just people introducing themselves to each other with sex hand shakes? The OP never said anything about what she actually allegedly observed other than some blankets on windows. OP, what did you actually see? Do you know for certain it’s the student workers and not just people in the library? ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/56 "2016-02-18T23:13:46Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > The OP never said anything about what she actually allegedly observed other than some blankets on windows. > > OP, what did you actually see? Do you know for certain it’s the student workers and not just people in the library? The situation that brought on this rant was an arrest by a campus police officer who recently caught an amorous pair of student workers on the top floor of the library in a study cubicle having sex a little after 11:00 p.m. one night. The officer did not mention whether they had blocked a window or not. Because the library periodically (bad pun intended) has this sort of problem, campus police do sweeps of problem areas. That night they caught two people who apparently thought the police weren’t going to be round at that time (apparently it didn’t occur to them that the police might be smart enough to vary their schedules). The fact that these two people were also supposed to be (gasp) working just ads to the rant worthiness of their stupidity. In many years of library work I have caught people alone or in couples (I have yet to come across a threesome), having sex in the library. Unfortunately, it’s an irritating problem wherever people live together in groups that some people will be stupid and/or exhibitionists. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/57 "2016-02-18T23:19:48Z")
“She was only a librarian’s daughter, but you could get lost in her stacks!” ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/58 "2016-02-18T23:37:17Z")
Don’t use top floor. Cops like to search the limits of buildings. Next floor down probably would’ve been OK. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/59 "2016-02-19T00:19:55Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > (I have yet to come across a threesome) I’ve come [del]across[/del] in a few, myself. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387/60 "2016-02-19T00:22:39Z")
> [@dasmoocher](#): > > Drinking. And sometimes that’s combined with sex. Oh, the things that girl could do with a tequila bottle . . . [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/student-workers-having-sex-in-the-library-or-good-god-i-hate-giving-this-speech-all-the-time/746387.md?page=4)