Keep in mind that if you go downtown, it’s all torn up (or it was when I was there, what? in April? something like that). They’re redoing the Marquette interchange. It’s something to see, though - its a pretty impressive hole running north through downtown.
You could always visit the Marquette campus (say Snicks, giving a shout out to her old university. Went there for two years).
The Marcus Center for the Performing Arts always has some great shows. That’s their calender in the link
Art’s Performing Center on 144 E. Juneau Ave. pretty much always has the same sort of show. I couldn’t find a safe link, but you can google it if you want.
Hey now, I’m typing this in Milwaukee. Lots of great ideas in this thread, and a lot of silly ones. I have been to the Dickeyville Grotto and there is no reason for you to brave the crappy weather we’re having for 200 miles to go see it.
The best brewery tour in Milwaukee is the Lakefront Brewery. They know you are there for the beer, so you get a beer before you start the tour. The tour is entertaining and quirky and informative and they make great beer.
Actually that’s the second best brewery tour, I could give you a tour of our brewery if you have free time on a weekday. I work at the Leinenkugel’s brewery here in town and we aren’t generally open to the public. Any other Milwaukee area dopers would be welcome as well. We have 2 or 3 beers on tap in our tasting room and think I still have some samples of a brand new upcoming product.
Oh, and giving away the secret code to the Safe House is kind of against the point of having a secret code. If everyone knows it who will we watch dance in gnome hats?
It’s all part of Doper solidarity, yo.
Anyways, won’t using the word “place” not get you in? Or do I misremember? I haven’t been back home to Milwaukee in some time.
-Joe
Although I’ve not been there myself yet, I’m told no one - not even people who don’t think they love chocolate - to miss:
The Chocolate Tree
1048 N. Old World 3rd Street, Milwaukee (just west of the river)
414 271 5774
(Look for parking spots around the corner just north of the building).
Seconded. Great beer, and if you don’t drink, great sodas. It’s cheap and always a good time.
Just be warned, it is (naturally) hard to find. Ask a taxi driver to take you there, or get directions from some place on Water Street. (While you’re there, grab a meal at the Water Street Brewery.) If Miss Moneypenny is working the door, tell Katie I said “Hi”. And avoid the Spy’s Demise.
Other items of note:
The Milwaukee Art Museum (on the lakefront, a Santiago Calatrava-designed building.) Swing by Apollo on Brady Street for some good Greek food, and hit up Abu’s Jerusalem of the Gold for some cheap Middle Eastern eats. Catch a film at the Landmark Oriental and have a Guinness or Irish whiskey afterwards at Paddy’s. (That’s another one you’re going to have to get local guidance to find–not concealed, it’s just not marked.) Close Wolski’s if you have the fortitude, and have a sandwich and martini at Elsa’s (near Milwaukee School of Engineering) during happy hour to watch all the pretenders and hipsters. Have dinner at Trocodaro (N. Water) some evening. Stroll down the Riverfront if it’s not too cold.
Things to avoid (no matter what people say):
The International Clown Museum.
Art’s Performing Center (across from the Performing Arts Center). (Shame on you, Qadgop!)
The Uptowner.
Mel’s on Water.
The Hi-Hat.
Enjoy.
Stranger
If you don’t use the precise code-phrase, you don’t get in. (Well, not without having to do the aforementioned gyrations.) The phrase can be found on a piece of glassware once you are inside.
Operatives who give away the code freely are turncoats and must be eliminated. Merijeek, you better be looking behind you every time you enter a room. 
Stranger
Yes, and if I remember right, there’s a poster with Nixon(?) saying the correct phrase as well.
My whole point (boy, things can get convoluted sometimes) is that “I’m looking for a safe place” is incorrect…
Unless my memory is wrong.
-Joe
That’s a shame. I really do like weird places like that, but I think with my limited free time, 200 miles would be a bit far.
That sounds like an excellent offer. Email me and maybe we can coordinate something. My class let’s out at 4:30 Monday through Thursday and at 2:30 on Friday. Lunch is open too, but probably a limited time frame. The class is in downtown Milwaukee on Watertown Plank rd.
I guess I’ll dance if I have to, but my manager will be along on the trip too, and I’m sure he’ll be pressuring me into hanging out with him (which I obviously don’t want to do). If I could take him there and make him look like a fool while I look like a local it would be a great story to bring home to my co-workers 
Isn’t the Leinie’s Brewery up in St.Croix? That’s about 4 hours from Milwaukee.
You are correct, the phrase with the word ‘place’ is incorrect.
Where have I been during this whole thread?
I live in the Milwaukee area and spend a lot of time in the city. The above posters have hit on most of the good spots to see, except I don’t think anyone mentioned Water Street for the nightlife. You don’t have to be single to enjoy a good time at a few bars that are all on the same block.
August, August, August,…you’ve been holding out on me man. I drive right past your place of employ everyday on the way to work. I’ll be contacting you also.
And since there really is a lot of stuff to do in Milwaukee (like taking a tour of the Pabst Mansion, Eating, Drinking, the Museums, etc.)
Here is a guide of the Water Street Bars.
Check out the Water Street Brewery and the Brew City BBQ if you get a chance!
Don’t forget, we also have a Casino. The Potowatami Casino in the Valley. As long as you’re down there (if you can find it) check out Pigsville and have a drink at one of the bars. 
(There’s only a couple of bars there and it’s very hard to find, it’s like an old subdivision hidden within a city.)
Here is a list of Music Events and a calendar to select certain dates.
In fact, go to OnMilwaukee.com for all the latest and greatest things to do in the Milwaukee area, remember to use the calendar on the left side to select the different dates you’re interested in. We have some old timey movie theaters in the city too, I think they still play the Rocky Horror Picture Show and have it acted out next to the stage by local nut-jobs - I believe it’s at the Oriental Theatre, it’s been while for me but it’s a neat show, the whole audience gets into it.
Here is a very comprehensive list of ALL THAT IS GOOD in Milwaukee.
The Shepherd Express.com , another good Milwaukee interest site.
Here is Milwaukee Magazines list of things to do this weekend. That’s always updated so check it out regular like.
So, between the other posters and the three main links I gave you (OnMilwaukee, Shepherd Express, Milwaukee Magazine) you should be able to find all kinds of great stuff to indulge in here in Milwaukee.
Have funds and good luck!
There may be one up there too, but the one Auggie works at is right off of 43 just north of the Marquette interchange.
Ooooh, another suggestion is to zoom Google Earth in on the area you are staying and activate all the local placeholders. You can see where all the local hotspots are. I just did that for downtown Milwaukee and there’s about a bajillion places that show up just with ‘coffee shops’ and ‘bars/clubs’ activated.
Much of Milwaukee isn’t in high def yet but you’ll get an idea of what’s around you.
Please pardon the hijack, but could all you Milwaukeeans pop into this thread and see if you can’t help me? http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=358929
Emails sent to those interested in a tour.
Hampshire, the main Leinie’s brewery is in Chippewa Falls, WI. We are just a small satellite brewery here in MKE. Used to be the old Val Blatz brewery.
