# Stupid Arguments You Never Want To Hear Again **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 9, 2005, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846 "2005-12-09T07:22:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rodgers01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b19c9b/32.png) [@Rodgers01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rodgers01)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 7:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/1 "2005-12-09T07:22:31Z")
“I don’t do drugs/drink alcohol because I can have fun at parties without it.” Huh?? You can have fun at parties without drinking Pepsi either, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t drink Pepsi. Just say what you mean: drugs and alcohol can be bad for you, you’re just not interested, you’re afraid you’ll get addicted – whatever. Don’t make up something stupid. “You shouldn’t curse, because surely you have a more creative vocabulary than that.” Again, just say what you mean: people shouldn’t curse because it’s rude, not because it’s “uncreative.” People say banal things all the time; how come we’re suddenly supposed to get creative when it comes to expressing anger? I _hate_ those two arguments. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![rinni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f6c823/32.png) [@rinni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rinni)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 10:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/2 "2005-12-09T10:21:29Z")
“You don’t want kids? Well, it’s different when it’s your own. You’ll change your mind someday.” Mm-_hmm_. And monkeys might fly out of my butt. But not out of my uterus! ---
**Author:** ![TastesLikeBurning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@TastesLikeBurning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TastesLikeBurning)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/3 "2005-12-09T10:34:00Z")
“Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.” ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/4 "2005-12-09T10:51:27Z")
The lottery is a tax on people who are bad at math. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/5 "2005-12-09T13:19:35Z")
Whenever you critcize anyone for doing something they shouldn’t: Well, you do it, too. Particularly when it’s something I’ve never done or wouldn’t do in a million years, or if I’m not claiming to be perfect. ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/6 "2005-12-09T13:49:35Z")
> [@TastesLikeBurning](#): > > “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.” > [@An Arky](#): > > The lottery is a tax on people who are bad at math. I fail to see what’s stupid about either one of these statements. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/7 "2005-12-09T14:09:51Z")
That’s because you’re stupid! Ha! Just kidding. 😃 Let’s parse the phrase and see just how intelligent it really is. **The lottery** - OK, I think we can all agree on what that is **is a tax** - OK, right there, you’re off in the weeds…from the M-W dictionary: _Main Entry: 2tax Function: noun Usage: often attributive 1 a : a charge usually of money imposed by authority on persons or property for public purposes b : a sum levied on members of an organization to defray expenses 2 : a heavy demand_ Nope. **on people who are bad at math** - OK, even if it _was_ a tax, what exactly would be the method to determine who’s bad at math. High school transcripts? Competency tests? Let’s say you _could_ conclusively determine who’s bad at math. I really can’t see how that tax could possibly be legal, being discriminatory and all (legal types could probably quote you some chapter and verse about how it’s unconstitutional or something). So, in a sentence of 12 words, I can only find two that are correct, meaning that 5/6 of the sentence is wrong. Not entirely certain, but a statement that is 5/6ths wrong might be fairly called stupid. Now, if you were to say “playing the lottery is stupid, the odds are so astronomically against you that you’re wasting your money”, I wouldn’t have a problem with it, but even there, some game theory geeks could probably somehow disprove it. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/8 "2005-12-09T14:11:19Z")
Arguments aren’t stupid just because you’re tired of hearing them. ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/9 "2005-12-09T14:12:18Z")
“That’s just _heat lightning_.” ---
**Author:** ![Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4da419/32.png) [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gala_Matrix_Fire)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/10 "2005-12-09T14:16:56Z")
“You say you’ve never enjoyed getting drunk? You’re just not doing it right!!” ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/11 "2005-12-09T14:22:37Z")
[Planes can’t take off if they’re on a treadmill.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=348452) ---
**Author:** ![Nature\_s\_Call](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nature_s_call/32/19006_2.png) [@Nature\_s\_Call](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nature_s_Call)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/12 "2005-12-09T14:53:04Z")
The lottery tax is a metaphor, not an argument. The implied argument, “…and therefore buying lottery tickets is unwise” is sound. * * * My contribution: “Why are they teaching _that_ in school? I’ll never use that on the job.” ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/13 "2005-12-09T14:56:30Z")
> [@GrizzRich](#): > > “That’s just _heat lightning_.” Oooh, I’ll agree with you on that one. When I was in high school a friend and I got into a debate about this, him saying heat lightning was an actual thing, me trying my best to convince him it wasn’t, until we finally went to the earth studies teacher to confirm my answer. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/14 "2005-12-09T14:58:15Z")
“Gays shouldn’t parent because it’s important to teach the child proper gender roles.” -What is an improper gender role? Can you identify some? -Why is it important? Do people who have “improper” gender roles reflect bad parenting? As the genderqueer product of a happy heterosexual marriage, what’s my excuse? -Why would gay people not be able to teach “proper” gender roles even if we concede it is important to do so? Are single parents also ineligible to do so? What about straight couples where the parents have “improper” gender roles? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/15 "2005-12-09T15:09:37Z")
Also the ever popular: Gays shouldn’t be allowed around children. Why? Because they might molest them. But you said “gays.” You didn’t say “child molesters.” _Well, it’s the same thing_ :wally ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/16 "2005-12-09T15:10:15Z")
> [@Exgineer](#): > > I fail to see what’s stupid about either one of these statements. I agree 100% and that was what I was about to post. The guns and lottery statements are true on a basic level. I get tired of the following pro-abortion arguments: “Its my body” - right but you can do many things with your body that aren’t allowed or condoned. Loading youself up with crack, cigarettes and alcohol isn’t generally considered good form because it affects the baby. Russian stacking dolls show that just because one thing is inside another, it isn’t necessarily owned by the larger thing. “It’s is just a collection of cells” - True but what do with think you are? For the record, I am pro-choice but these arguments strike me as idiotic. ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/17 "2005-12-09T15:11:00Z")
The problem I have with the lottery, believe it or not, is people telling me that I _should_ play. “Somebody has to win,” they say. So fucking what? 149,999,999 people have to lose, and I don’t feel like being one of them. ---
**Author:** ![DogMom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9c0ed/32.png) [@DogMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DogMom)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/18 "2005-12-09T15:27:45Z")
> [@Rodgers01](#): > > “I don’t do drugs/drink alcohol because I can have fun at parties without it.” > > Huh?? You can have fun at parties without drinking Pepsi either, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t drink Pepsi. Just say what you mean: drugs and alcohol can be bad for you, you’re just not interested, you’re afraid you’ll get addicted – whatever. Don’t make up something stupid. Actually, when _I_ say that, it’s because some bozo who’s already at least one-and-a-half sheets to the wind is breathing gin fumes at me and trying to get me to “just take ONE drink, why won’t you take at least ONE? It’s a PARTY!” (I had noticed that, thanks) or when someone is trying to convince me that getting hammered out of my mind and into unconsciousness is somehow enjoyable. That’s when I respond with “I don’t need booze / drugs to enjoy myself, thanks just the same now go away.” Gratuitous self-righteous pre-emptive snooty “I don’t _need_ it to have fun”, yeah, I hate that too. But I also hate the “oh, you’re a _goody two shoes_ what’s wrong with YOU that you don’t drink, what are you, a recovering alcoholic or something” attitude that somehow seems to arise whenever I politely say, “I don’t drink, but thanks.” ---
**Author:** ![BwanaBob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bwanabob/32/2985_2.png) [@BwanaBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BwanaBob)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/19 "2005-12-09T15:30:03Z")
I don’t like the lottery argument either. Why is the lottery magically better / valid if the payout matched the odds. The odds don’t change. Example: suppose odds of winning “Your State” lottery is 1:1000000 Ticket cost is $1. So I’m an idiot if the jackpot isn’t greater than $1000000? That’s so anal. Why does it have to be cost-effective? I get a thrill that maybe lightning strikes and I might win. That’s worth a $1 to me. ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2005, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846/20 "2005-12-09T15:35:31Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > “It’s is just a collection of cells” - True but what do with think you are? A more complex collection of specialized cells that happens to be self-aware? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-arguments-you-never-want-to-hear-again/334846.md?page=2)