# Stupid bitch Michelle Bachman **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 29, 2013, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225 "2013-06-29T23:18:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 11:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/21 "2013-06-30T11:23:00Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > This thread reminds me of a thread I ran into back on Politicalforum. Basically, the gist of it was “Thank god for Fox News! All you liberals who want to see the end of Fox News just want to get rid of it because it is the _only_ news network providing the right-wing point of view!” > > …My immediate, and obvious response was, “Okay, so why is the only right-wing network the one with the most no-information or low-information viewers, _and_ the most likely to lie, and the network whose viewers got the most things the most wrong in various polls?” > > …I didn’t really get an answer to that. I’ll give you an answer, but it’s not the one you want. Fox News figured out a long time ago that they were first and foremost a business. CNN has never figured that out, and MSNBC is just now following Fox’s lead. It’s not about “news”, it’s about ratings and what puts eyeballs on their channel in order to sell advertisements. And well, here’s where it gets uncomfortable. Fox just has more money to spend on production values than their two major competitors. Better production values mean better ratings, and better ratings mean more money from advertisements, and more money means better production values. The cynical cycle feeds itself. All three have completely given up on any investigative reporting, but Fox is just a whole lot better at peddling bullshit than the other two. Conservatives watch it because every human likes affirmation, Liberals watch it because humans also like to be mad at something\*, and moderates watch them because well, frankly they have better production. While watching the returns come in from the last Presidential election I had a choice between Rachel Maddow endlessly recapping what happened an hour ago, Wolf Blitzer reading fucking twitter feeds, or the Fox News anchors amusingly try to calm a very delusional Karl Rove down. Fox was simply better TV. - I think that’s their evil genius. Angry people don’t change the channel. They make conservatives angry about made up bullshit, and they make liberals angry because they are making up bullshit ---
**Author:** ![BigAppleBucky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigapplebucky/32/178_2.png) [@BigAppleBucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigAppleBucky)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/22 "2013-06-30T11:29:45Z")
Learn to spell her name: It’s Michele Bachmann Leave off the second L for Loony and add an N for Nutty. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/23 "2013-06-30T12:15:37Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > AAaaarrgh! Image…seared…into brain. Must…reach…DVd collection. Must…find…_Teenage Vampire Lesbian Sluts… From …Outer Space…_. Bachmann was in that? Awesome! Go forth: start the rumor mill. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/24 "2013-06-30T13:26:30Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > We’ve reached that point where its time for someone to say something nice about her. She has had the ability to work an erection out of a gay husband at least a few times. ---
**Author:** ![Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/budget_player_cadet/32/205_2.png) [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Budget_Player_Cadet)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/25 "2013-06-30T13:35:05Z")
Worth noting however: the original reports that aired on Fox News (that is, the very first reports, not any of the fucking bullshit punditry afterwards) about the attacks on the consulate in Benghazi was really good war journalism. Beyond that, though? One drop of wine in a casket of shit does not a case of Burgundy make. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/26 "2013-06-30T17:05:24Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > I thank Rep. Bachmann for sharing her strong defense of God’s will, if only because it allowed Nancy Pelosi to give her (solidly sane) reaction at a press conference afterward, which was: “Who cares?” I wish I could erect a statue of Nancy Pelosi saying “Who Cares” in response to Bachmann’s blather. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/27 "2013-07-01T03:23:19Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > She’s insane. Her district is filled with very conservative and very racist morons. Thankfully she will no longer be in congress in about 18 months. But, unfortunately, the republican candidates seeking to replace her are **worse!** Well, not as entertaining, nor as prone to say any stupid thing in public, but possibly more conservative & hateful than Michele. And the district is so gerrymandered that the republican candidate is likely to win it. Also the democratic candidate who almost knocked her off last time has now withdrawn, saying that he has accomplished his goal of getting rid of her. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/28 "2013-07-01T03:45:45Z")
Bitches and the stupid everywhere think that the OP is really out of line for this comparison. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/29 "2013-07-01T04:41:50Z")
> [@Kolak\_of\_Twilo](#): > > She clearly has extraordinary sexual talents considering she has successfully been impregnated multiple times by a gay man. Something tells me there was a turkey baster as intermediary. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/30 "2013-07-01T13:16:54Z")
> [@LouisB](#): > > I wish I could erect a statue of Nancy Pelosi saying “Who Cares” in response to Bachmann’s blather. Maybe you could give it a speech bubble. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/31 "2013-07-01T19:06:58Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > I’ll give you an answer, but it’s not the one you want. Fox News figured out a long time ago that they were first and foremost a business. CNN has never figured that out, and MSNBC is just now following Fox’s lead. It’s not about “news”, it’s about ratings and what puts eyeballs on their channel in order to sell advertisements. And well, here’s where it gets uncomfortable. > > Fox just has more money to spend on production values than their two major competitors. Better production values mean better ratings, and better ratings mean more money from advertisements, and more money means better production values. The cynical cycle feeds itself. All three have completely given up on any investigative reporting, but Fox is just a whole lot better at peddling bullshit than the other two. > > Conservatives watch it because every human likes affirmation, Liberals watch it because humans also like to be mad at something\*, and moderates watch them because well, frankly they have better production. While watching the returns come in from the last Presidential election I had a choice between Rachel Maddow endlessly recapping what happened an hour ago, Wolf Blitzer reading fucking twitter feeds, or the Fox News anchors amusingly try to calm a very delusional Karl Rove down. Fox was simply better TV. > > - I think that’s their evil genius. Angry people don’t change the channel. They make conservatives angry about made up bullshit, and they make liberals angry because they are making up bullshit This fails to offer any rational explanation for anyone watching “news” on television in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2013, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/32 "2013-07-04T02:08:15Z")
I suspect that the reason she believes that being gay is a choice is that her and her “husband” wake up every morning and make a conscious choice to be heterosexual and the reason that they believe homosexuals are the work of Satan is that they fight off Satan’s homosexual temptitudes constantly. Sad, really. But still a very small very evil piece of me wants to see her actually win the presidency just for the delicious gooey melt-in-your-mouh pleasure of seeing MBach and Marcus in the roles of President and First Lady…that’s like just the best reality show EVER with a zany new episode every single day for 4 years ---
**Author:** ![BigAppleBucky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigapplebucky/32/178_2.png) [@BigAppleBucky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigAppleBucky)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2013, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/33 "2013-07-04T23:42:33Z")
> [@Ann\_Hedonia](#): > > I suspect that the reason she believes that being gay is a choice is that her and her “husband” wake up every morning and make a conscious choice to be heterosexual and the reason that they believe homosexuals are the work of Satan is that they fight off Satan’s homosexual temptitudes constantly. > > Sad, really. > > But still a very small very evil piece of me wants to see her actually win the presidency just for the delicious gooey melt-in-your-mouh pleasure of seeing MBach and Marcus in the roles of President and First Lady…that’s like just the best reality show EVER with a zany new episode every single day for 4 years Four years? Not likely. She’d have the world blown up and the end times completed in two. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2013, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/34 "2013-07-05T00:57:18Z")
> [@Skypist](#): > > Yesterday I passed by and Fox Business was on and some blond bimbo host on there was actually saying something to the effect that the country was broken. That’s not news, that’s a fucking opinion! So? Maybe it was an opinion show. You get 'em on CNN and MSNBC too. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2013, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/35 "2013-07-05T01:09:07Z")
> [@Ann\_Hedonia](#): > > I suspect that the reason she believes that being gay is a choice is that her and her “husband” wake up every morning and make a conscious choice to be heterosexual and the reason that they believe homosexuals are the work of Satan is that they fight off Satan’s homosexual temptitudes constantly. A Theocon’s holy and pious But it seems that his judgment is biased By his mind filled with floods Of the cries of hung studs: “Come into the closet and try us!” ---
**Author:** ![dnooman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/839c29/32.png) [@dnooman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dnooman)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2013, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/36 "2013-07-05T05:29:51Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > This thread reminds me of a thread I ran into back on Politicalforum. Basically, the gist of it was “Thank god for Fox News! All you liberals who want to see the end of Fox News just want to get rid of it because it is the _only_ news network providing the right-wing point of view!” > > …My immediate, and obvious response was, “Okay, so why is the only right-wing network the one with the most no-information or low-information viewers, _and_ the most likely to lie, and the network whose viewers got the most things the most wrong in various polls?” > > …I didn’t really get an answer to that. Duh, Fox News is “Fair and Balanced” or did they drop that? Anyways, any station other than Fox is part of the “Liberal media”. They are nothing but lies and facts! The feeble-minded can’t always form a reasoned political stance on a difficult issue, are you going to deny them a network to tell them how to think/vote? How dare you? If they hate the blacks and the gays, shouldn’t there be a network that says that isn’t do bad? Fact: there was no other network that had the guts to expose the “Terrorist fist bump” that Barrack Hussein Obama made on the night of his questionable victory. The GOP is PROUD to have Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin as their spokeswomen. The GOP is all about women, and abandoning your position as Governor, and being bat-shit crazy, and having contempt for everyone just a bit. God blesses them because they said so. My Mom and her husband are full to the brim on the Fox News KoolAid. He says he needs his “Fox fix” and I want to die. Opinions are one thing and are subjective, reality is another and is objective. You are not allowed your own version of reality, ever. The sad reality behind Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin is that they would be nowhere near a political office if it wasn’t for enough idiots voting them into them. Think about that for a second. That is some scary shit. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2013, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/37 "2013-07-05T17:46:48Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > AAaaarrgh! Image…seared…into brain. Must…reach…DVd collection. Must…find…_Teenage Vampire Lesbian Sluts… From …Outer Space…_. > [@Jonathan\_Chance](#): > > Bachmann was in that? Awesome! > > Go forth: start the rumor mill. I do not, for a second, believe that Michele Bachmann was in _Teenage Vampire Lesbian Sluts From Outer Space_. The rumors that Michele Bachmann was in _Teenage Vampire Lesbian Sluts From Outer Space_ must be completely false, but if Michele Bachmann really wanted to put the rumors that she was in _Teenage Vampire Lesbian Sluts From Outer Space_ to rest, she would at least issue a denial that she was in _Teenage Vampire Lesbian Sluts From Outer Space_. Why won’t Michele Bachmann deny she was in _Teenage Vampire Lesbian Sluts From Outer Space_? ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2013, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/38 "2013-07-05T18:26:05Z")
> [@Mollie\_Magill](#): > > Why won’t Michele Bachmann deny she was in _Teenage Vampire Lesbian Sluts From Outer Space_? Because she can’t reveal to the world that on the night in the 90’s when it was made she was actually sleeping with Glenn Beck. It’s the same reason he can’t address the charges that he raped and killed that 14 year old. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/39 "2013-09-09T00:35:07Z")
[Bachmann **might** be going to jail.](http://www.politicususa.com/2013/09/06/michele-bachmann-congress-prison-doj-launches-investigation.html) ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225/40 "2013-09-09T01:02:43Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > [Bachmann **might** be going to jail.](http://www.politicususa.com/2013/09/06/michele-bachmann-congress-prison-doj-launches-investigation.html) _meh_ The crowing of a wildly partisan web site is not particularly persuasive. I would not be surprised if she and/or her husband wind up paying some nominal fine if most of the accusations prove out, but I doubt that she is looking at serious jail time. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-bitch-michelle-bachman/662225.md?page=3)