# Stupid celebrity baby name of the week **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 6, 2005, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021 "2005-10-06T06:18:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![LavenderBlue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e95f7d/32.png) [@LavenderBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LavenderBlue)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/1 "2005-10-06T06:18:48Z")
[http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/eo/20051004/en\_celeb\_eo/17493](http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/eo/20051004/en_celeb_eo/17493) That poor child . . . ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hook](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ccd318/32.png) [@The\_Hook](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Hook)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/2 "2005-10-06T06:22:10Z")
> [@LavenderBlue](#): > > [http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/eo/20051004/en\_celeb\_eo/17493](http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/eo/20051004/en_celeb_eo/17493) > > That poor child . . . Tell me about it. Sending a child into outer space inside a crystal rocket all by himself… what does that do to a kid? ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/3 "2005-10-06T07:20:28Z")
At least them can call him Kal, I guess. Shame that a woman that pretty has to be dumb enough to go along with a name like that. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/4 "2005-10-06T07:29:19Z")
> [@LavenderBlue](#): > > [http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/eo/20051004/en\_celeb\_eo/17493](http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/eo/20051004/en_celeb_eo/17493) > > That poor child . . . As a Geek, I approve. After all, it’s not another damned Tyler or Jason or Zachary… ---
**Author:** ![The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_chao_goes_mu/32/3191_2.png) [@The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Chao_Goes_Mu)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/5 "2005-10-06T13:31:05Z")
That’s just…super. ---
**Author:** ![cardsfan1975](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f9b8f/32.png) [@cardsfan1975](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cardsfan1975)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/6 "2005-10-06T15:42:44Z")
> [@The Chao Goes Mu](#): > > That’s just…super. Super?! Man, it’s awesome! cf’75 ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/7 "2005-10-06T16:38:27Z")
Meh. It’s no “Askia” but it’ll serve. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/8 "2005-10-06T20:22:46Z")
> [@Dr. Rieux](#): > > As a Geek, I approve. After all, it’s not another damned Tyler or Jason or Zachary… I don’t know. When I think “geeky,” I think of a pair of Buffy fans who might name their daughter Willow. “Kal-el” is kinda beyond the pale. Also, why not Zod? ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/9 "2005-10-06T20:36:25Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > I don’t know. When I think “geeky,” I think of a pair of Buffy fans who might name their daughter Willow. “Kal-el” is kinda beyond the pale. Also, why not Zod? I can see the little tyke standing on top of the jungle gym declaring “kneel before Zod!” And then getting pummeled. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/10 "2005-10-06T20:41:49Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > I can see the little tyke standing on top of the jungle gym declaring “kneel before Zod!” And then getting pummeled. Yeah, but it’s more creative than the inevitable “What’s that? Up in the sky?” jokes. And what is little Kal-el going to be for Halloween? ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/11 "2005-10-06T20:45:42Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Yeah, but it’s more creative than the inevitable “What’s that? Up in the sky?” jokes. And what is little Kal-el going to be for Halloween? Bizzaro? Brainiac? Lex Luthor? Doomsday? The list goes on and on. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/12 "2005-10-06T20:48:45Z")
As much as we hate Britney (well, I don’t hate her, but most on the board do),we can at least thank her for having the sense to name her child a normal name. Hey, it’s the only hope her kid has. Baby Jesus cries for all the Hollywood babies. Their little asses are gunna get kicked some day. ---
**Author:** ![NDP](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ndp/32/55_2.png) [@NDP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NDP)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/13 "2005-10-06T21:06:49Z")
> [@DiosaBellissima](#): > > Baby Jesus cries for all the Hollywood babies. Their little asses are gunna get kicked some day. That would be true only if the Hollywood offspring end up going to the same schools as non-Hollywood offspring. Since they likely won’t, they’ll be in the same classes as other oddly-named children of celebrities so it won’t be such an obvious target for ridicule. If anything, the kids with ordinary names like Bill, Patricia, or John are going to feel like the odd ones out. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/14 "2005-10-06T21:22:44Z")
> [@NDP](#): > > That would be true only if the Hollywood offspring end up going to the same schools as non-Hollywood offspring. Since they likely won’t, they’ll be in the same classes as other oddly-named children of celebrities so it won’t be such an obvious target for ridicule. Maybe they’ll take turns kicking each others’ asses. > [@NDP](#): > > If anything, the kids with ordinary names like Bill, Patricia, or John are going to feel like the odd ones out. Either that or they’re gonna be BUSY! ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/15 "2005-10-06T21:42:36Z")
Let’s be honest. Kal-El can be shortened to “Kal”, which is a perfectly normal-sounding substitute the kid can resort to. [Apple](http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/showbiz/3717057.stm), [Pilot Inspektor](http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,12647,00.html), and [Jermajesty](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jermaine_Jackson) aren’t so lucky. ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/16 "2005-10-06T22:01:45Z")
Screw you guys. If I have a girl I’m naming her Kama Tui. If I have a boy I’m naming him Kilowag. Maybe Tomar Re… ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/17 "2005-10-06T22:40:22Z")
[Kalil is a boy’s name in Hebrew & Arabic.](http://babynames.indastro.com/hebrewonemK.html) Kalel is a pretty unobjectionable variant. It could mean “Swiftness of God” in Hebrew. As for the [eonline link re Jason Lee’s kid](http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,12647,00.html), some people are apparently a bit too uncultured. > [@](#): > > Robin Williams named his daughter Zelda, after the classic Nintendo video game. ??!!! Obviously, they never heard of Scott & Zelda Fitzgerald. Really… Zelda, Tallulah, Ahmet, & for that matter Jett & Rumer (despite the homophones), are quite respectable names. And as for Scout & Apple, well, at least they’re short, clear, & easy to spell. That’s a virtue, I suppose. Fiona Apple’s middle name is Apple. (She was born Fiona Apple Maggart.) Comic book artist Jon Bogdanove named his son Benjamin Kal-El Bogdanove. He was later hired to draw Superman, so maybe it helped. The boy’s in college now, & goes by his middle name. [http://alltheseworlds.hatbag.net/pivot/entry.php?id=2546#comm](http://alltheseworlds.hatbag.net/pivot/entry.php?id=2546#comm) [http://evvyawards.org/24/submissions/nominees/](http://evvyawards.org/24/submissions/nominees/) [http://1ee68aa6-7425-48fd-8ae6-216a6d5218fc.profile.learningportals.emerson.edu/](http://1ee68aa6-7425-48fd-8ae6-216a6d5218fc.profile.learningportals.emerson.edu/) ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/18 "2005-10-06T22:45:04Z")
& yeah, kids named Tomar & Katma would be cool. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/19 "2005-10-06T22:50:43Z")
There’s nothing wrong with the name Apple. It’s a perfectly sweet name. I cannot understand why people seem to dislike it so much. ---
**Author:** ![beckwall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b487fb/32.png) [@beckwall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beckwall)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2005, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021/20 "2005-10-06T23:05:51Z")
David Duchovey is cute, smart (PhD) and talented. However, his young son’s name is Kidd Miller. They apparently call him Miller. That’s just great. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-celebrity-baby-name-of-the-week/325021.md?page=2)