# Stupid Commercial Toilet Paper Dispensers! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 30, 2002, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-commercial-toilet-paper-dispensers/145585 "2002-12-30T01:00:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![TheLadyLion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d78d45/32.png) [@TheLadyLion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLadyLion)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-commercial-toilet-paper-dispensers/145585/1 "2002-12-30T01:00:36Z")
Last night did it! My fiancee and I went to a movie at a theater here in Phoenix. After the show, I went into the ladies room. There on the wall was one of those totally obnoxious NEWFANGLED completely enclosed super-huge metal toilet paper dispensers. I HATE THOSE THINGS! :smack: First, they stick out into the stall (which is already all of 2’ wide as it is) a good 6-8". When I sat down, this thing was literally in my damn lap! I imagine these things were invented to both minimize the number of times theater (or restaurant) staff have to come in to change the TP, because they hold a minimum of two gigantic rolls of the really scratchy stuff (I swear there was a chunk of wood in the stuff I used last night). So they have to make them gigantic to hold these humongous rolls of paper. Second, these monstrosities are totally enclosed and appear to be opened only with a key (yeah, like I really want to STEAL the sandpaper they call TP in those places). The TP can only come out through a small slot in the bottom of the dispenser. So if someone decided to tear the TP short before I went in there, and my hand isn’t dainty (or limber… see below) enough to be threaded into the slot to find the end of the 10,000 foot roll, then I am totally S.O.L., literally. Unless, of course, some kind-hearted female in the stall next door will pass me some of hers, assuming her TP dispenser is being kinder that day than mine is. Third, and this is related to #2 above, some idiot obviously thinks that these things are to be mounted on the wall in the same location as the old TP dispensers… slightly below you and to the side. WRONG! If the TP is being coy and doesn’t want to dangle out of the dispenser on its own, I have to become a contortionist to find the little slot with my hand (usually my left one, and I am right-handed…good luck!), then reach in and struggle to turn the roll until **VOILA!** … I magically and gratefully find the end of the TP. Usually this can be accomplished by crawling low to the floor and craning my neck upward to find the slot in the first place, then twist myself around to jam my hand inside the damn thing. These things need to be mounted at least 4’ above the floor and be constructed in a “hand-friendly” manner, so the “toiletee” can actually see inside to find the end of the TP and be able to exit the bathroom without a new case of capral tunnel syndrome or a ruptured disc. There, I feel better. Thanks! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-commercial-toilet-paper-dispensers/145585/2 "2002-12-30T01:07:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TheLadyLion \* > First, they stick out into the stall (which is already all of 2’ wide as it is) a good 6-8". When I sat down, this thing was literally in my damn lap! Ohh man… I hate bathroom stalls… Half of them are so small I have to cram myself right up to the toilet my pants/legs brushing against the damp sides (YUCK!) just to get the door closed! And then when I sit down my knees nearly hit the door! Those stalls are made for women about the size of a mouse! Not for my 6’1 leggy height! GRAH! ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-commercial-toilet-paper-dispensers/145585/3 "2002-12-30T01:25:49Z")
You tell 'em hon. I can’t stand that cheap, institutional, non-absorbent, “John Wayne” ass paper that seems to be universal in public places. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-commercial-toilet-paper-dispensers/145585/4 "2002-12-30T03:16:14Z")
I hate the ones that give you one piece at a time. Yes, I am quite willing to stick my hand in my arse with just one easily rippable piece of paper between my hand and my poo. ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-commercial-toilet-paper-dispensers/145585/5 "2002-12-30T03:35:22Z")
With you all the way. My pet bathroom peeve is stall height. I am six feet tall. If the stall comes up to my boobs, I have a slight problem. Since I am both straight and not into excrement games anyway, I don’t like to be able to see over the side of a stall. I also like the stalls to be lower than my knees. Grump. Public bathrooms suck. (with, oddly, the exception of the basement girls room at my school. Fully enclosed stalls with real doors. Normal TP dispensers, enclosed, but otherwise normal and easy to get at. Even smells nice. Weird.) ---
**Author:** ![Shadez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/90ced4/32.png) [@Shadez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shadez)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-commercial-toilet-paper-dispensers/145585/6 "2002-12-30T07:24:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TheLadyLion \* > **Second, these monstrosities are totally enclosed and appear to be opened only with a key (yeah, like I really want to STEAL the sandpaper they call TP in those places).** > > Some people are poor enough, hon… > > \*\*If the TP is being coy and doesn’t want to dangle out of the dispenser on its own, I have to become a contortionist to find the little slot with my hand (usually my left one, and I am right-handed…good luck!), \*\* > > Then what would the lefties do? 😉 > > \*\*crawling low to the floor and craning my neck upward to find the slot in the first place, \*\* > > I’ve never had trouble with finding the slot, you’re doing it blind, but its always in the same place. Some of them even have helpful little diagrahms… > > \*\*then twist myself around to jam my hand inside the damn thing. \*\* you don’t need to put your hand IN the ungodly contraption, just take a finger and keep sliding the TP an inch at a time. A bit slower, but always works. glad you feel better. and oh do I _EVER_ sympathize about the space restrictions! When I started school this year only one stall had a TP dispenser on the opposite side of the stall, and then they moved it to the other side. Ick. At least before I could stand on the side of the toilet while I closed the door. Now the dumb door’s in the way! /Shadez ---
**Author:** ![TheLadyLion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d78d45/32.png) [@TheLadyLion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLadyLion)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-commercial-toilet-paper-dispensers/145585/7 "2002-12-30T16:19:29Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Shadez \*\*\* I’ve never had trouble with finding the slot, you’re doing it blind, but its always in the same place. Some of them even have helpful little diagrahms… you don’t need to put your hand IN the ungodly contraption, just take a finger and keep sliding the TP an inch at a time. A bit slower, but always works._\* Wish the ones at the Harkins theaters HAD a little diaphragm or something to ease the TP out. They don’t. The rolls of TP they use have a diameter of about 12-14", so a roll low on TP requires a hand up inside the holder to find the roll to turn it. The slot is only about 2"x5" in size. That is awkward enough, but then they position the holder so darn low to make finding the end of the roll almost prohibitive. I plan to complain to Harkins (and every other place I go that has these things) that they are awkward, placed poorly and make obtaining one of life’s necessities next to impossible. Thanks for the support, though, **Shadez**! 😃