# Stupid criminal #53 **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 9, 2011, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071 "2011-03-09T18:27:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/1 "2011-03-09T18:27:08Z")
[This story](http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2011/03/intruder_calls_police_on_homeo.html) made my day. On further reflection, perhaps he wasn’t as dumb as it sounds. ---
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/2 "2011-03-09T19:27:18Z")
There was already this thread about the incident from yesterday. > **[Help - rescue me from the guy I am burglarizing!](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=599869)** > > Dueling 911 calls … You couldn’t put this stuff in a script 😃 Sort of like chutzpah is a man up in front of a judge for killing his parents throwing himself on the mercy of the court for being an orphan. At least they didn’t have a shootout, but do... The guy is really lucky because the woman/homeowner had 2 large dogs with her, I think they were German Shepards. “Honey, it looks like we are going to be remodeling the bathroom after all. Yeah, it’s a big mess in there right now and the mirror is broken.” ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/3 "2011-03-09T20:15:58Z")
I object to the thread title. [Vaughn Johnson](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaughan_Johnson) was #53, and is not a stupid criminal. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/4 "2011-03-09T20:20:06Z")
Trust me, there are way more than 53 of them. I may have seen 53 in the past month. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/5 "2011-03-09T20:53:17Z")
> [@Dallas\_Jones](#): > > There was already this thread about the incident from yesterday. > > [Help - rescue me from the guy I am burglarizing! - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=599869) > > The guy is really lucky because the woman/homeowner had 2 large dogs with her, I think they were German Shepards. > > “Honey, it looks like we are going to be remodeling the bathroom after all. Yeah, it’s a big mess in there right now and the mirror is broken.” Shit, how did I miss that? I just saw the article in today’s paper. A mod may wipe this thread from the face of the planet, if so desired. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/6 "2011-03-09T21:11:54Z")
Dude wanted a shower; now he’ll get them, courtesy of the state. Seems he wasn’t so dumb after all. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Foggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foggy/32/1082_2.png) [@Foggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Foggy)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2011, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/7 "2011-03-09T21:25:56Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > A mod may wipe this thread from the face of the planet, if so desired. Nuke it from orbit to be sure.:p:D ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2011, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/8 "2011-03-10T04:11:59Z")
The update today is that they let the guy loose, and he fails to appear in court today. The cops then catch him loading stolen property into a stolen car. My guess is that they’ll keep him in the slammer until trial time. ---
**Author:** ![Sage\_Rat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sage_rat/32/399_2.png) [@Sage\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sage_Rat)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2011, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-criminal-53/574071/9 "2011-03-10T04:33:20Z")
Amazingly, there’s a relationship between doing drugs and going to jail.