# Stupid crushes on people you'll never meet **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 13, 2011, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180 "2011-04-13T01:43:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/21 "2011-04-13T21:56:01Z")
> [@Shecky](#): > > Aaaannnnd.. Spank Bank. What does this mean? ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/22 "2011-04-13T22:01:44Z")
[Miyoko Fujimori](http://www.practicalstriptease.com/images/Miyoko-181.gif) (link is SFW despite the titillating url) who used to host the Shop Erotic infomericals. The glasses kill me. ---
**Author:** ![wonder\_lust](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecccb3/32.png) [@wonder\_lust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonder_lust)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/23 "2011-04-13T22:22:22Z")
Look at your man. Now back to me. ---
**Author:** ![Surly\_Chick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Surly\_Chick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surly_Chick)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/24 "2011-04-13T23:02:13Z")
Mine really _is_ stupid. Backstory is that my dad was visiting for the last month and he’s really into professional bull riding so we’ve been watching a lot of it. I now have the most irrational crush on Shorty Gorham, one of the rodeo clowns (now known as bull fighters). I have to admit it’s the most ridiculous crush I’ve ever had. ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/25 "2011-04-13T23:33:09Z")
> [@Maiira](#): > > . . . > Three things working against me: > > 1. He’s nearly 50 years my senior > 2. He’s gay > 3. He’s dead. > > The ultimate of stupid crushes. And yet, there it is. Pretty much sums up the stupidity of my crush on Jeremy Brett. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/26 "2011-04-14T00:59:38Z")
> [@Kolga](#): > > I have a wickedly stupid crush on one of the Deadliest Catch boys, and I will not reveal who, but I don’t think it’s that stupid, because most of those guys are crazy bad-asses (with a few utter tools thrown into the mix). My wife and I are going to Milwaukee next month to see the Hillstrand brothers, and Sig Hansen, talk. Will you need to kill me from jealousy? ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/27 "2011-04-14T01:05:07Z")
Singer / actress [Kristin](http://www.yenra.com/wiki/images/Kristin-chenoweth.jpg) [Chenoweth](http://www.therainbowcollective.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/oscar9_1203905738.jpg). [Samantha](http://www.fatwallet.com/static/attachments/12727_samantha_mohr.jpg) [Mohr](http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4011/4501126965_09a7b60813.jpg), one of the evening meteorologists on The Weather Channel ---
**Author:** ![Gleena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b3f665/32.png) [@Gleena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gleena)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/28 "2011-04-14T01:08:18Z")
> [@Maiira](#): > > Young [Graham Chapman.](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/f7/Graham_Chapman_Portrait.png) > > Three things working against me: > > 1. He’s nearly 50 years my senior > 2. He’s gay > 3. He’s dead. > > The ultimate of stupid crushes. And yet, there it is. I’ll see that ultimate stupid crush and up you a [Young Cat Stevens](http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/_/2244479/Cat+Stevens.jpg). 1. He’s very, very Muslim now. 2. He’s very, very married with six kids (five living.) 3. He really don’t look like that at ALL [any more](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_NSvlBnyuEHY/SwUwq4pRNfI/AAAAAAAAAls/cKKENw-hEcU/s1600/Yusuf+Islam.jpg). 4. Even if all that were not true, he’s 20 years older than I am. And yet…_sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![Wallenstein](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5a626/32.png) [@Wallenstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallenstein)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 9:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/29 "2011-04-14T09:40:30Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > What does this mean? Means **Shecky** will be saving the image of that young lady for later, during his/her “special alone time”\* \*By which we mean wanking… ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/30 "2011-04-14T12:45:07Z")
> [@Maiira](#): > > Young [Graham Chapman.](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/f7/Graham_Chapman_Portrait.png) > > Three things working against me: > > 1. He’s nearly 50 years my senior > 2. He’s gay > 3. He’s dead. > > The ultimate of stupid crushes. And yet, there it is. If it makes you feel better, Alexander Hamilton is easily the hottest guy on American money… ---
**Author:** ![RedBloom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/dbc845/32.png) [@RedBloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedBloom)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/31 "2011-04-14T16:37:30Z")
Casey Affleck… just, beautiful… ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/32 "2011-04-14T18:02:53Z")
Claire Danes during “My So-Called Life”. To this day I have an irrational hatred for Jared Leto because he stole my girlfriend. When Edward Norton beat the shit out of him in “Fight Club”, I grinned. Funny thing is, I haven’t liked anything that Clair Danes has been in since that show. ---
**Author:** ![Kolga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e56c9b/32.png) [@Kolga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kolga)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/33 "2011-04-14T18:27:37Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > My wife and I are going to Milwaukee next month to see the Hillstrand brothers, and Sig Hansen, talk. Will you need to kill me from jealousy? Well, yea, actually, because I have a bit of a crush on ALL the Deadliest Catch guys 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Aqua\_regis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d78d45/32.png) [@Aqua\_regis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aqua_regis)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/34 "2011-04-14T19:36:38Z")
For me it’s Jennifer Lawrence, since I have seen her in _Winter’s Bone_. I watched a couple of interviews with her after that and not only is she beautiful, she has a laugh that’s perhaps not very flattering, yet I find it charming. I hope she doesn’t change it. Ok, when googling for a link I saw she has been named one of the world’s sexiest people, so I am not alone. Link [http://www.courier-journal.com/article/20110414/SCENE03/304140056/-1/ZONE03/Jennifer-Lawrence-named-one-world-s-sexiest-people?odyssey=nav|head](http://www.courier-journal.com/article/20110414/SCENE03/304140056/-1/ZONE03/Jennifer-Lawrence-named-one-world-s-sexiest-people?odyssey=nav%7Chead), she laughs in the video, for those interested. ---
**Author:** ![Amber\_in\_Treasury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc79bd/32.png) [@Amber\_in\_Treasury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amber_in_Treasury)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/35 "2011-04-14T19:53:08Z")
Glad I’m not the only one, so here we go. He was straight AFAIK, and not a religious nut or anything like that. And one of the few seriously left-wing celebrities who actually lived his principles and wasn’t completely full of it. But he died aged 43 when I was just a few months old. Yet his charisma alone is enough to make my knees weak. And then of course there’s that voice of his; but I sometimes wonder how anyone can manage NOT to fall in love with his voice. 😉 I am, of course, talking about [Luke Kelly](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gehGvW-RIkU). ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2011, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/36 "2011-04-15T00:15:38Z")
> [@surrounded\_by\_literalists](#): > > As a teenager, it was Carl Sagan. His brain was soooo sexy. Tom Brokaw and Robert Reich. > > And strangely enough, that bad boy, Shan Yu, the Hun leader, from the Disney movie ‘Mulan’. > You did say _stupid_ crushes right? Okay, if fictional crushes are okay I had one. Still kind of do, whenever I see episodes on TV. David Xanatos, voiced by Jonathan Frakes, from the show _Gargoyles_. Even if he was real, or I was a toon, he was still twenty years my junior. Talk about stupidity. An IRL crush I had was for a professor of mine. He was older, a member of the clergy, and very, very, married. He not only had a brain, with a side order of sense of humor, but he was really good looking. Gots to go take a cold shower. ---
**Author:** ![KRC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/45deac/32.png) [@KRC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KRC)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2011, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/37 "2011-04-15T07:00:02Z")
Andreas Baader, because when I was a kid I dreamed he blew up my house. Maybe it was more a situation where I just couldn’t get him out of my mind but I did write a poem about him 25 years later. (Yes, I started taking medications after that.) ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2011, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/38 "2011-04-15T07:26:28Z")
> [@surrounded\_by\_literalists](#): > > You did say _stupid_ crushes right? Stupider the better … 😃 ---
**Author:** ![dwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwyr/32/363_2.png) [@dwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwyr)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2011, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/39 "2011-04-15T08:06:47Z")
> [@Maiira](#): > > Young [Graham Chapman.](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/f7/Graham_Chapman_Portrait.png) > > Three things working against me: > > 1. He’s nearly 50 years my senior > 2. He’s gay > 3. He’s dead. > > The ultimate of stupid crushes. And yet, there it is. Oh, I have one of those. He’s thirty years older than me, not gay but married with kids, and he’s dead. I also have a stupid crush on Stephen Fry - not much older than me but definitely gay. But so adorable. ---
**Author:** ![E.Thorp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@E.Thorp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E.Thorp)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2011, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180/40 "2011-04-15T20:17:30Z")
[Louise Brooks](http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2009/1/20/1232490566665/Louise-Brooks-in-Lulu-in--006.jpg), 1906-85. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-crushes-on-people-youll-never-meet/578180.md?page=3)