# Stupid Gun news of the day (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 29, 2013, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729 "2013-01-29T19:01:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 406
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2018, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8102 "2018-04-08T21:16:49Z")
No. It’s been explained to you enough times by now. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2018, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8103 "2018-04-08T22:18:37Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > No. It’s been explained to you enough times by now. I’ve heard your deliberately twisted interpretation of the Second Amendment enough times. Are you still going with 2nd= state army, or are you currently championing the “slave patrol” slander? ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2018, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8104 "2018-04-08T22:19:01Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > On the grounds that they’re military weapons? 😕 Wasn’t that what the Second Amendment was originally for? The judge cited a SCotUS majority opinion written by Antonin Scalia that suggests that 2A is not meant to be interpreted as brooking no restraint. Scalia, if you had not heard, was one of the most right-wing judges in the Court’s modern history, who was regarded as an originalist scholar. I guess we shall see how this court feels about precedent – if this issue even gets that far. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2018, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8105 "2018-04-08T23:08:34Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > Not-so-stupid gun news. A federal judge rules that AR-15s and large capacity magazines do not fall under the protection of the Second Amendment, and states can ban them on a state by state basis. > [Federal judge upholds Mass. ban on AR-15, large capacity magazines](https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2018/04/07/federal-judge-upholds-massachusetts-ban-ar-15-large-capacity-magazines/495781002/) I’m hoping this one gets taken to the Supremes who I expect to take it out behind the woodshed and give it the beatdown it so desperately deserves. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2018, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8106 "2018-04-09T00:48:23Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > The judge cited a SCotUS majority opinion written by Antonin Scalia that suggests that 2A is not meant to be interpreted as brooking no restraint. Scalia, if you had not heard, was one of the most right-wing judges in the Court’s modern history, who was regarded as an originalist scholar. I guess we shall see how this court feels about precedent – if this issue even gets that far. None of the provisions of the Bill of Rights have ever been held to secure a boundless libertarian immunity from government interference. But the judge’s ruling taken at face value would be that gun regulation is a states’ rights issue that the Second has no bearing on; which is contradicted by the _McDonald v. Chicago_ ruling. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2018, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8107 "2018-04-09T14:06:58Z")
Not that either, friend. > [@](#): > > “The AR-15 and its analogs, along with large capacity magazines, are simply not weapons within the original meaning of the individual constitutional right to ‘bear arms,’” U.S. District Judge William Young, a Reagan appointee, wrote in a decision Thursday in Boston, dismissing a lawsuit over the state law. > … > “Weapons that are most useful in military service — M-16 rifles and the like” aren’t protected by the Second Amendment and “may be banned,” Young quoted Scalia as writing on behalf of the five-member majority. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2018, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8108 "2018-04-09T15:36:13Z")
Which is as incredible as would be a ruling that the First Amendment somehow authorizes government censorship. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2018, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8109 "2018-04-09T16:15:51Z")
Perhaps it’s time you reread a few case summaries. The SC rulings you refer to don’t say what you think/wish they did. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2018, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8110 "2018-04-09T18:12:53Z")
> [@Lumpy](#): > > On the grounds that they’re military weapons? 😕 Wasn’t that what the Second Amendment was originally for? If you wonder what the Founding Fathers would have thought of the AR-15 — the “AR” stands for “_America’s Rifle_” — you should ask them. This may not be as hard as it might seem: most of the Founding Fathers are surely “rolling over in their graves.” But I’d rather operate in the present. Let’s review the groups of gun owners and ask which ones need the AR-15: (1) Ranchers who want to kill the coyotes that’ve been eating their goats. (2) Sportsmen who need to shoot pheasants or peacocks who’ve had their wings clipped. (3) Playboys who find that packing heat makes their penises harder. (4) Patriots eager to help Trump MAGA by going to the border and shooting Kenyan terrorists sneaking across. (5) Late-night prowlers who want to take out a mugger rather than give them the $50 in their wallet. (But, with people carrying plastic instead of cash, is mugging on the decline as a profession?) (6) Christians whose God wants them to be happy. I may have left out some groups of gun-owners, but let’s start with these. I guess group (4) and possibly (1) need their _America’s Rifles_. Group (2) may be better off without semi-autos — these dotards might end up just maiming a friend in the face. I don’t think Groups (3) and (5) want any kind of long gun. And if an American can’t get a hard-on with a gun smaller than a Glock 19, I’d suggest a Viagra prescription instead. As for Group (6), let’s listen to Fabian Rodriguez: > [@Fabian Rodriguez](#): > > Rodriguez encounters plenty of skeptics in addition to his mother who ask him why anyone would need so many guns, particularly a semiautomatic rifle like an AR-15 — a gun that can fire 45 high-velocity rounds per minute, bullets that travel so fast that their shock waves mimic an explosion as they enter a body. > > His honest answer: He doesn’t need them. > > He wants them because he enjoys them, and the Constitution gives him the right to have them. > > “I know I don’t need it,” he says of the AR-15. “The revolver, statistically speaking, is more than enough to defend myself.” > > But it’s frustrating when people ask him this, because that’s not the point. > > The point is that the Second Amendment protects his right to bear arms, whatever and however many he wants, as a guard against tyranny. > > “When the Second Amendment was written, you were supposed to be able to fight off the government,” he says. “So with that being said, you should be able to have exactly what the government has.” So he should have “exactly what the government has.” Why stop at _America’s Rifle_? When the Fake Media/Deep State turns the country back over to Michelle Obama, won’t we want bazookas and Stinger missiles? I think the 2nd A should allow us to have sarin nerve gas: Obama would certainly use it against us if he could. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2018, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8111 "2018-04-09T18:55:30Z")
Why doesn’t that guy collect printing presses because the 1st Amendment protects the free press? ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_MB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steve_mb/32/5339_2.png) [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8112 "2018-04-12T15:13:37Z")
[The benefits of arming teachers:](http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/382813-parkland-teacher-reportedly-left-a-loaded-gun-in-a-public) > [@](#): > > The Parkland, Fla., teacher who volunteered to carry a gun in school after the deadly Feb. 14 massacre was arrested Sunday for leaving his loaded gun in a public bathroom, the Miami Herald reported Wednesday. > > Sean Simpson, a chemistry teacher at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, left his loaded Glock 9 mm in the bathroom of a Deerfield Beach Pier on Sunday, the the Herald stated stated, citing a Broward County Sheriff’s Office report. > > Simpson said he left the gun by mistake and that when he went back for it, Joseph Spataro, described as a vagrant according to the sheriff’s report cited by the Herald, had already found it and fired it. > > Spataro was charged with firing a weapon while intoxicated and trespassing. > Simpson was arrested and charged with failing to safely store a firearm. He posted a $250 cash bond and was released, the Herald reported… ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8113 "2018-04-12T15:32:21Z")
> [@Steve\_MB](#): > > [The benefits of arming teachers:](http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/382813-parkland-teacher-reportedly-left-a-loaded-gun-in-a-public) I’ll bet that makes his students and fellow teachers feel ever so much safer. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8114 "2018-04-12T16:20:37Z")
> [@septimus](#): > > So he should have “exactly what the government has.” Why stop at _America’s Rifle_? When the Fake Media/Deep State turns the country back over to Michelle Obama, won’t we want bazookas and Stinger missiles? I think the 2nd A should allow us to have sarin nerve gas: Obama would certainly use it against us if he could. What bothers me most, really, is the number of people, including some on this very board, who talk openly about how they’re preparing to \*kill \*people, including police who come to enforce a law they only hypothesize about but would decline to abide by as citizens if it came to pass. They not only fantasize about it and tell us about their fantasy, they often have acquired the means to do it and practice using it. The board is \*supposed \*to have a strongly enforced rule against making death threats, but it is not applied to those making that particular sort of death threat. These folks, and they are numerous, typically go on to solemnly agree we need to keep guns away from the mentally ill, but they say that without any sense of irony . They even go on to insist that _they’re_ the Good Guys, despite all the evidence that they are, in fact, Bad Guys, threats to the safety of us all and especially to law enforcement officers. ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8115 "2018-04-12T16:47:36Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > What bothers me most, really, is the number of people, including some on this very board, who talk openly about how they’re preparing to \*kill \*people, including police who come to enforce a law they only hypothesize about but would decline to abide by as citizens if it came to pass. They not only fantasize about it and tell us about their fantasy, they often have acquired the means to do it and practice using it. Yep, that sure is strange. “I have guns because the Constitution guarantees that I can” “Would you give up your guns if the Constitution outlawed them?” “No way!” :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8116 "2018-04-12T17:08:57Z")
“No way!” \*and \*“If the tyrannical government sends their jackbooted thugs to get my AR-15, I’m spraying lead!” etc. That’s threatening to kill police officers. Threats by people who claim to be law-abiding citizens. I wish I didn’t get it, but I do. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8117 "2018-04-12T17:43:07Z")
The same people who are prepared to take up arms against “the government” (not necessarily here but elsewhere on the interwebs) also seem to assume that the majority of police and military personnel will be on their side, so I’m not sure what they’re planning on shooting at. And also we should respect the troops always. Unless we feel the need to shoot them in defense of the country. Whose government we are working to overthrow. Because freedom! ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8118 "2018-04-12T17:45:21Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > The same people who are prepared to take up arms against “the government” (not necessarily here but elsewhere on the interwebs) also seem to assume that the majority of police and military personnel will be on their side, so I’m not sure what they’re planning on shooting at. The are told by the NRA that their enemies are liberals and minorities, so I assume that that is who they will be shooting at. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8119 "2018-04-12T18:06:34Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > Yep, that sure is strange. > > “I have guns because the Constitution guarantees that I can” > > “Would you give up your guns if the Constitution outlawed them?” > > “No way!” > > :rolleyes: In defense of the indefensible, most gun nuts think the 2nd Amendment was granted by the Baby Jesus himself, or his Daddy, and predates any human-written law. Find any group of typical white American males and ask them about the Second Commandment and I’ll lay odds you’ll get more responses about guns than about graven images. OTOH, the North Carolina Council of Churches has contrasted the two Second Amend/Command-ments and shown us that not all American Christians are stark-raving insane: > [@](#): > > “You shall not make for yourself an idol,” the Bible’s Second Commandment reads. > > Now a new billboard going up along Interstate 85/I-40 near Mebane will include the quote, along with a photo of a pile of guns and ammunition. > > The billboard is from the N.C. Council of Churches, a statewide organization representing 18 Christian denominations in the state and 6,200 individual congregations. About 1.5 million North Carolinians are members of congregations under the Council’s umbrella, the council says… > > The council is trying to “guide the conversation” about gun safety in the U.S., it said, by pointing to the Second Commandment. > > Right after God commands God’s people not to follow other gods, God commands the people not to have any idols, according to the Old Testament. > > “Idols can assume a lot of guises in our world that we don’t immediately understand as idolatry,” said Jennifer Copeland, executive director of the North Carolina Council of Churches. “For many of us, guns have become the symbol of safety, the idol we turn to because we ‘believe in them’ to keep us safe… As people of faith, we should always guard against those things that become more important to us than the God who calls us to abundant life. How much more so, should we call out the idols that hold out false promises,” she said. Hmm. 1.5 million in a state with over 10 million. Anyone want to bet that white-skinned Christians are under-represented in this forward-thinking group? (Jennifer Copeland herself is white, but gun worshippers are mostly whites ashamed of their penis size, and Ms. Copeland lacks a penis altogether.) ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8120 "2018-04-12T18:39:46Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > The same people who are prepared to take up arms against “the government” (not necessarily here but elsewhere on the interwebs) Oh, it’s here too. You know the names. > [@k9bfriender](#): > > The are told by the NRA that their enemies are liberals and minorities, so I assume that that is who they will be shooting at. Yes, the liberals will have jackboots. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2018, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729/8121 "2018-04-12T18:58:08Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > Oh, it’s here too. You know the names. > Yes, the liberals will have jackboots. :rolleyes: “And you will know me by my jackboots.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729.md?page=405) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-gun-news-of-the-day-part-1/648729.md?page=407)