# Stupid Republican idea of the day **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 26, 2009, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897 "2009-03-26T18:48:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1013
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20242 "2015-03-22T07:42:21Z")
> [@adaher](#): > > You’re in the wrong thread. That article belongs in the stupid liberals thread. The media isn’t uniformly liberal, of course, but the writer’s opinion on what the media SHOULD be covering if it was actually liberal is ridiculous. Then put up. Post it in that thread, and provide _details_ about what exactly in that list does not deserve coverage, and why. Or you can just blrblrblrblrbluster vaguely and wander off with a black cloud over your head. ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 8:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20243 "2015-03-22T08:32:13Z")
> [@Death\_of\_Rats](#): > > OK, to be fair, I am not 100% certain this guy is a Republican, but being an Orange County lawyer who repeatedly uses the word “sodomite” in his ballot measure to legalize executing gays I am willing to go out on a limb. > > [Lawyer Proposes California Ballot Measure Allowing Shooting, Killing Gays](http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/lawyer-proposes-california-ballot-measure-allowing-shooting-killing-gays-n327196) I would vote in favor of a ballot measure that makes it legal to shoot people who want it to be legal to shoot gay people. I consider them dangerous violent militant supremacists, no different from admitted Nazis, and would consider it a huge favor to the world if they all dropped dead from sucking too much shit out of each others’ assholes and choking on it until the stupidity ceased to be. ---
**Author:** ![Frostillicus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Frostillicus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frostillicus)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20244 "2015-03-22T16:27:41Z")
Thread winner here… Ted Cruz is announcing that he is running for president tomorrow. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20245 "2015-03-22T16:33:12Z")
A one day presidential campaign this far out from the actual election isn’t gonna get him elected. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Greenjeans](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.greenjeans/32/551_2.png) [@Mr.Greenjeans](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Greenjeans)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20246 "2015-03-22T17:16:42Z")
> [@Frostillicus](#): > > Thread winner here… > > Ted Cruz is announcing that he is running for president tomorrow. And he already has the perfect campaign slogan: Ted Cruz in 2016 The World Is On Fire ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20247 "2015-03-22T17:22:55Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > A one day presidential campaign this far out from the actual election isn’t gonna get him elected. However it does guarantee that “moderates” like Bush will have to outdo or match Ted in the woo woo and extreme right ideas in the primaries. Not likely to make Bush and others look convincing as moderates when the general election comes and they will have to flip flop on the crazy things they said in the primaries. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20248 "2015-03-22T17:44:07Z")
> [@Mr.Greenjeans](#): > > And he already has the perfect campaign slogan: > > Ted Cruz in 2016 > The World Is On Fire …and he’s got a shitload of gasoline! ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20249 "2015-03-22T17:51:23Z")
> [@Mr.Greenjeans](#): > > The World Is On Fire We don’t need no water, let the motherfucker burn! ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20250 "2015-03-22T18:17:14Z")
Ted Cruz running for President isn’t stupid, it is genius. He knows he hasn’t got a prayer of winning, but here’s an excuse to funnel several million dollars through superPACs and have it end up in his personal bank account at the end of it. Stupid people are the folks who donate money to a Ted Cruz PAC. But then, those are the people who have no idea what to do with all the money they got from reducing drivers wages by half and cutting their gasoline stipend in thirds and jacking up the delivery fee and collecting more in delivery fees per driver than they spend in labor on two drivers. 2004 wage: almost 8 per hour, 2014 wage less than 5 per hour Gas stipend 2013: $1.25 per order, 2015: 22 cents per mile, most deliveries less than 5 miles. Does not multiply for multiple orders per run. Delivery fee: $3, four runs per hour is $12. Does not go to the driver. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20251 "2015-03-22T18:21:13Z")
> [@Askthepizzaguy](#): > > I would vote in favor of a ballot measure that makes it legal to shoot people who want it to be legal to shoot gay people. But then they’d want laws to make it legal to shoot people who shoot people who want it to be legal to shoot gay people and oh god I’ve gone cross-eyed. ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20252 "2015-03-22T18:45:29Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > But then they’d want laws to make it legal to shoot people who shoot people who want it to be legal to shoot gay people and oh god I’ve gone cross-eyed. Bah, they couldn’t be bothered to make a distinction between gay persons and their allies. ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20253 "2015-03-22T22:30:41Z")
> [@Askthepizzaguy](#): > > I would vote in favor of a ballot measure that makes it legal to shoot people who want it to be legal to shoot gay people. > > I consider them dangerous violent militant supremacists, no different from admitted Nazis, and would consider it a huge favor to the world if they all dropped dead from sucking too much shit out of each others’ assholes and choking on it until the stupidity ceased to be. You misread the poor attorney. He doesn’t want to make it legal to shoot gay people, he wants to make it _mandatory_. ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20254 "2015-03-22T22:52:50Z")
> [@Rick\_Kitchen](#): > > You misread the poor attorney. He doesn’t want to make it legal to shoot gay people, he wants to make it _mandatory_. Did a gay guy whip out his cock and pee all over this guy’s petunias or something? Like, what’s his deal? Something has to be provoking this behavior, and at this point, it can only be roving bands of homosexual ninjas who appear out of nowhere, squirt jizz on his face, and then vanish in a puff of festive rainbow-colored smoke. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20255 "2015-03-23T00:01:54Z")
> [@Askthepizzaguy](#): > > Did a gay guy whip out his cock and pee all over this guy’s petunias or something? > > Like, what’s his deal? Something has to be provoking this behavior, and at this point, it can only be roving bands of homosexual ninjas who appear out of nowhere, squirt jizz on his face, and then vanish in a puff of festive rainbow-colored smoke. If I had to guess, I’d say that’s his fantasy rather than his fear. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20256 "2015-03-23T00:24:57Z")
How does this look? [Campaign Poster Prototype](http://home.blarg.net/~sydde/WonF.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20257 "2015-03-23T02:23:48Z")
I like how the flames spell out “666” in Aramaic. Nice touch. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20258 "2015-03-23T03:02:04Z")
> **[Disturbed Man Tries to Get Into White House](https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/disturbed-man-tries-to-get-into-white-house)** > > In 2013, he gained entry to the United States Senate and was heard quoting incoherently from a children's book before he was finally subdued. Disturbed Man Tries to Get Into White House > [@](#): > > WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – A disturbed Canadian man wants to try to get into the White House, according to reports. > > The man, who was born in Calgary before drifting to Texas, has been spotted in Washington, D.C. in recent years exhibiting erratic behavior, sources said. > > In 2013, he gained entry to the United States Senate and was heard quoting incoherently from a children’s book before he was finally subdued. [More…](http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/disturbed-man-tries-to-get-into-white-house) ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20259 "2015-03-23T06:13:33Z")
Actually, that raises an amusing notion : Ted Cruz is technically not a natural born citizen since he was born abroad and his father only became a US citizen in 2005. Depending on which interpretation of “natural born citizen” one chooses to go by, he could well be ineligible . He’s indubitably slightly more ineligible than Obama ever was. Wanna bet the Birther contingent (some elements of which are \*still \*dogging Obama) lets that quietly slide 😉 ? ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20260 "2015-03-23T07:55:55Z")
His mother was a US citizen. Of course, so was Obama’s but that doesn’t stop the birthers. ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2015, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/20261 "2015-03-23T13:11:42Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > Actually, that raises an amusing notion : Ted Cruz is technically not a natural born citizen since he was born abroad and his father only became a US citizen in 2005. Depending on which interpretation of “natural born citizen” one chooses to go by, he could well be ineligible . He’s indubitably slightly more ineligible than Obama ever was. > > Wanna bet the Birther contingent (some elements of which are \*still \*dogging Obama) lets that quietly slide 😉 ? I remember that there was at least one Birther who was raising alarm bells on Rubio, so there is at least a portion of them with consistency of belief. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897.md?page=1012) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897.md?page=1014)