# Stupid Republican idea of the day **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 26, 2009, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897 "2009-03-26T18:48:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 25
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/481 "2009-07-10T01:00:39Z")
> [@MEBuckner](#): > > First they instituted a minimum wage, and I didn’t speak up, because I wasn’t making 25 cents a day. > > Then they instituted food stamps, and I didn’t speak up, because I wasn’t hungry. > > Then they instituted direct transfer payments for single mothers of young children, and I didn’t speak up, because I wasn’t a single mother of a young child. > > Then they instituted unemployment insurance, and I didn’t speak up, because I’m not unemployed. > > Then they instituted social security for the elderly, and I didn’t speak up, because I’m not old. > > And then they instituted universal single-payer health insurance, and there was no one left to speak up for me. That was beautiful **MEBuckner**. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Equipoise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/equipoise/32/151_2.png) [@Equipoise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Equipoise)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/482 "2009-07-10T05:37:06Z")
> [@Gala\_Matrix\_Fire](#): > > How come I can’t find anyone anywhere making fun of [Charlotte Allen’s latest bucket o’nonsense](http://www.latimes.com/features/health/medicine/la-oe-allen5-2009jul05,0,213990.story) in the Los Angeles Times? I didn’t have the stomach to read entirely through that lying pile of crap, but I do like her idea about ice floes. Let’s put all the stupid wingnuts on ice floes and set them adrift in the Pacific ocean. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/483 "2009-07-10T06:41:03Z")
First Ensign, then Sanford. Look what gay marriage has done to America! ---
**Author:** ![OttoDaFe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ottodafe/32/356_2.png) [@OttoDaFe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OttoDaFe)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/484 "2009-07-10T07:35:28Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > First Ensign, then Sanford. Look what gay marriage has done to America! Well, the argument does have a certain logical(?) consistency to it. After all, SSM causes a proliferation of Teh Gay Cooties in the air, which will latch onto a Real Man if he isn’t careful — and next thing you know, he’s color-coordinating the interior of his pickemup truck. The only sure prevention is to get as much hetero-sex as possible, and if his wife can’t supply his needs . . . well, a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. Notice that I didn’t say the argument isn’t batshit crazy, just that it’s somewhat consistent. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/485 "2009-07-10T14:48:02Z")
> [@OttoDaFe](#): > > Well, the argument does have a certain logical(?) consistency to it. After all, SSM causes a proliferation of Teh Gay Cooties in the air, which will latch onto a Real Man if he isn’t careful — and next thing you know, he’s color-coordinating the interior of his pickemup truck. The only sure prevention is to get as much hetero-sex as possible, and if his wife can’t supply his needs . . . well, a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. > > Notice that I didn’t say the argument isn’t batshit crazy, just that it’s somewhat consistent. And, of course, outsourcing sexy time to overseas vendors is perfectly consistent with Republican philosophy. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/486 "2009-07-10T20:56:11Z")
> [@Equipoise](#): > > I just realized that Brian could be talking about James Carville and Mary Matalin. Are claiming that they may not be of the same species? because I would have guessed phylum. ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/487 "2009-07-10T21:18:06Z")
[Transcript of full and Hannity-ized versions here.](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/07/08/sean-hannity-caught-selec_n_228060.html) ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/488 "2009-07-10T21:32:39Z")
Oops, I posted this to the wrong thread. Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2009, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/489 "2009-07-10T22:02:15Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > _does DeMint really think the most distinctive or objectionable characteristic of Nazi Germany was its overly generous social programs?_ > > No, but he probably believes that they led more or less directly to the death camps and gas chambers. :rolleyes: Well, it makes sense : first you cut them unemployment checks, and next thing you know, you give them free work… which makes them free ! And they didn’t EARN any of it ! Then they all vote themselves free ovens, and society breaks down. ---
**Author:** ![Equipoise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/equipoise/32/151_2.png) [@Equipoise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Equipoise)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2009, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/490 "2009-07-11T04:16:10Z")
> [@NurseCarmen](#): > > Are claiming that they may not be of the same species? Are they the same species? (What’s phylum?) [QUOTE=Beadalin] Oops, I posted this to the wrong thread. Sorry. [/QUOTE] That’s ok, we already got the Hannity stupidity covered here. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2009, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/491 "2009-07-11T05:52:00Z")
Fuck phylum. I’m still working on them being the same kingdom. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2009, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/492 "2009-07-11T13:15:13Z")
> [@Equipoise](#): > > Are they the same species? (What’s phylum?) Comes after kingdom and before class. For example, humans are in the kingdom _animalia_ (animals, duh), the phylum _chordata_ (vertebrates and a few creatures with spine-like structures), and the class _mammalia_. Sean Hannity appears in the kingdom animalia, phylum chordata, and class douchebaggia. ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2009, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/493 "2009-07-11T15:32:57Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Sean Hannity appears in the kingdom animalia, phylum chordata, and class douchebaggia. You’re mistaken; Hannity has no class. ---
**Author:** ![Nametag](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nametag/32/406_2.png) [@Nametag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nametag)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2009, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/494 "2009-07-11T17:34:30Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Comes after kingdom and before class. > > For example, humans are in the kingdom _animalia_ (animals, duh), the phylum _chordata_ (vertebrates and a few creatures with spine-like structures), and the class _mammalia_. Sean Hannity appears in the kingdom animalia, phylum chordata, and class douchebaggia. Whoa, whoa – class aside, are you saying Hannity has a backbone or backbone-like structure? ---
**Author:** ![OttoDaFe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ottodafe/32/356_2.png) [@OttoDaFe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OttoDaFe)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2009, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/495 "2009-07-11T18:24:56Z")
> [@Nametag](#): > > > [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > > > Comes after kingdom and before class. > > > > For example, humans are in the kingdom _animalia_ (animals, duh), the phylum _chordata_ (vertebrates and a few creatures with spine-like structures), and the class _mammalia_. Sean Hannity appears in the kingdom animalia, phylum chordata, and class douchebaggia. > > Whoa, whoa – class aside, are you saying Hannity has a backbone or backbone-like structure? Well, if you stretch the definition of “spine-like structures” to include “things that are covered with spines,” he might just make it past the bar. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2009, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/496 "2009-07-13T12:17:46Z")
> [@Nametag](#): > > Whoa, whoa – class aside, are you saying Hannity has a backbone or backbone-like structure? Oh, he’s got a backbone… as long as there is a Combes or other creature nearby which lacks one. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2009, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/497 "2009-07-13T13:34:44Z")
> [@Nametag](#): > > Whoa, whoa – class aside, are you saying Hannity has a backbone or backbone-like structure? It’s a series of coathangers twisted together to form a stiff braid. Laboriously inserted rectally every morning by Fox News interns. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2009, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/498 "2009-07-13T14:09:12Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > It’s a series of coathangers twisted together to form a stiff braid. Laboriously inserted rectally every morning by Fox News interns. That explains SO MUCH! ---
**Author:** ![stolichnaya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bcef8e/32.png) [@stolichnaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stolichnaya)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2009, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/499 "2009-07-13T14:43:20Z")
It takes a lot of work, that’s why they are always reminding each other. “You’re a 'brate American, Sean!” “Well, you’re a 'brate American, Roger!” Remember, you can’t gladhand without a spinal cord. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2009, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/500 "2009-07-15T16:42:47Z")
> [@MEBuckner](#): > > First they instituted a minimum wage, and I didn’t speak up, because I wasn’t making 25 cents a day. > > Then they instituted food stamps, and I didn’t speak up, because I wasn’t hungry. > > Then they instituted direct transfer payments for single mothers of young children, and I didn’t speak up, because I wasn’t a single mother of a young child. > > Then they instituted unemployment insurance, and I didn’t speak up, because I’m not unemployed. > > Then they instituted social security for the elderly, and I didn’t speak up, because I’m not old. > > And then they instituted universal single-payer health insurance, and there was no one left to speak up for me. Let this be a warning to us all. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897.md?page=24) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897.md?page=26)