# Stupid Republican idea of the day **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 26, 2009, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897 "2009-03-26T18:48:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 395
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2012, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7881 "2012-12-15T02:44:11Z")
> [@bup](#): > > Grover Norquist, [in a matter of a few stupid sentences,](http://thinkprogress.org/politics/2012/12/13/1327631/norquist-obama-may-decide-to-go-blow-up-small-countries/) manages to: > > 1. imply he’s in congress, > 2. give up the lie that his ‘citizens for tax-reform’ group is non-partisan, > 3. make a tasteless joke about making war for the hell of it, and > 4. in doing so, remind people that he was for the Iraq War and all the spending that went with it. Can we just make Grover Norquist the Speaker of the House? Please? Make it official! I mean, boy wants to run it, make him own it. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7882 "2012-12-18T03:10:04Z")
Ah, Huckabee. His religious “principles” are getting the better of his internal censor again. Apparently, we can not only blame the Newtown massacre on “[removing God from our schools](http://thinkprogress.org/politics/2012/12/14/1339971/huckabee-says-connecticut-school-massacre-occurred-because-we-removed-god-from-our-schools/)”, we can also blame it on “[tax-funded abortion pills](http://thinkprogress.org/health/2012/12/17/1344001/huckabee-blames-tax-funded-abortion-pills-for-newtown-massacre/)” and calling sinful things disorders instead. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7883 "2012-12-18T17:15:19Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > Ah, Huckabee. His religious “principles” are getting the better of his internal censor again. > > Apparently, we can … blame the Newtown massacre on … calling sinful things disorders instead. He’s right. We shouldn’t have said shooting up an elementary school was a \*disorder \*the way we did. I don’t know if he thinks Asperger’s is a sin or a disorder, but I hope he goes ahead and implies Asperger’s caused that dumbass to kill all those people. Governor, please proceed. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7884 "2012-12-18T17:22:11Z")
Perhaps just being mentally ill in any way at all is a sin. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7885 "2012-12-18T17:35:13Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > Ah, Huckabee. His religious “principles” are getting the better of his internal censor again. No, his inner dumbass just beat up his inner censor. ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7886 "2012-12-18T17:37:24Z")
It’s also the case that if you’re left-handed, you worship Satan. Clearly this massacre is due to the sin of left-handedness. The only responsible thing to do now is to force all lefties to convert to the proper, right-handed way of living their lives. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7887 "2012-12-18T17:38:57Z")
[Victoria Jackson.](http://www.newsmax.com/TheWire/victoria-jackson-sandy-hook-abortion/2012/12/17/id/468028) Really, what more does one need to say? Except, unlike Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory, I don’t think her mother had her tested. On second thought-- her crazy isn’t much different than Huckabee’s crazy. Except she seems to think Obama has personally performed surgeries on expectant women. ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7888 "2012-12-18T17:46:57Z")
Victoria Jackson isn’t even fair game at this point. She is literally the single dumbest person on the planet. I have seen her say more stupid things publicly than anyone else. And I’m considering Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, and the WBC “god hates fags” guy. She makes Sarah Palin and Sharron Angle look like geniuses. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7889 "2012-12-18T17:53:24Z")
I fucking hate Victoria Jackson because not only is she batshit insane and terminally offensive but I can’t watch UHF anymore without getting pissed off at her. And let’s be honest, the quotes belong around comic, not SNL. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7890 "2012-12-18T17:53:33Z")
It does seem appropriate that the Republicans have a celebrity champion whose major claim to fame is a voice that can scratch glass… ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7891 "2012-12-18T18:01:28Z")
Oh, I don’t hate her. She has successfully convinced me that she doesn’t have a functioning brain. All I feel toward her is pity. She reminds me of the folks that listen to end-times doomsayers who predict when the world will end, and it doesn’t, and they make another prediction, and the world doesn’t end, and they _still_ donate money to the guy who can’t predict his way out of a paper bag. It’s that dedication to belief, even when any rational, thinking person would walk away. It’s thinking you can walk through walls and breaking every bone in your face through repeated failed attempts. It proves that there’s no one behind the wheel. She has no thought processes whatsoever. There is only one note, played ad infinitum, and that note is JesusRepublicansGood, SatanDemocratsBad. She’s sort of like a really loud and annoying potted plant. More of a curiosity, and less of a sentient being. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7892 "2012-12-18T19:33:27Z")
> [@Askthepizzaguy](#): > > \ She’s sort of like a really loud and annoying potted plant. More of a curiosity, and less of a sentient being. So, basically, what you’re saying is that she belongs in a botanical garden ? ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7893 "2012-12-18T19:38:57Z")
> [@detop](#): > > So, basically, what you’re saying is that she belongs in a botanical garden ? Unfortunately, I’m now aware of any botanical gardens with padded walls… ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7894 "2012-12-18T20:11:35Z")
> [@detop](#): > > So, basically, what you’re saying is that she belongs in a botanical garden ? If she remained very quiet and very still, her doe-eyed innocence and large bow on her head would make her look vaguely like a fat, human-shaped flower. I submit that this is the full extent of her productive use as a human being. A fake office plant made out of human DNA instead of plastic. I’m not saying she’s a particularly \*good \*substitute for petroleum, which has far more potential uses. I’m just saying, if properly trained, she could eventually become a decorative piece, or be melted down to make some form of crude bio-fuel. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7895 "2012-12-18T20:14:53Z")
Finally, a candidate for my Soylent Green formulation! ---
**Author:** ![Askthepizzaguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askthepizzaguy/32/9405_2.png) [@Askthepizzaguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askthepizzaguy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7896 "2012-12-18T20:21:57Z")
She would be very opposed to being associated with the green movement. My counter-proposal: Soylent Tea. Basically, we could convert her into an ingredient in tea, perhaps a cup of earl grey, (or ditzy blonde) which would fit in more closely with her tea party ideology. We can bag her up, and then, we can honor her the best way I know how, re-creating the original Boston tea party, and dumping her overboard. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7897 "2012-12-18T21:00:01Z")
[Really, she’s the gift that keeps on returning no matter how many times you try to reason with it. Or burn it. Or hospitalize it for its own good.](http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2012/12/victoria-jackson-sandy-hook-elementary-school-shooting-guns-facebook) I wonder if there is some sort of special brain worm that attacks blue-eyed television people. Glenn Beck has a strain of it too. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7898 "2012-12-18T21:03:15Z")
According to one Newsweek columnist, gun control is never going to prevent mass school shootings. Instead, it’s far more reasonable for us to take the [Zapp Brannigan approach](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eowPka21BNc)and [send wave after wave of children running at shooters;](http://mediamatters.org/blog/2012/12/18/newsweeks-megan-mcardle-calls-for-children-to-b/191889) [QUOTE=Megan McArdle] I’d also like us to encourage people to gang rush shooters, rather than following their instincts to hide; if we drilled it into young people that the correct thing to do is for everyone to instantly run at the guy with the gun, these sorts of mass shootings would be less deadly, because even a guy with a very powerful weapon can be brought down by 8-12 unarmed bodies piling on him at once. [/QUOTE] ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7899 "2012-12-18T21:10:58Z")
Since the 2008 shooting here at Northern, we now have a university Emergency Response Guide that includes what to do in the event of a shooting. The protocol is definitely 1) Run, 2) Hide, and 3) Fight back with everything you can. Nothing about rushing the shooter. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2012, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897/7900 "2012-12-18T21:11:16Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > According to one Newsweek columnist, gun control is never going to prevent mass school shootings. Instead, it’s far more reasonable for us to take the [Zapp Brannigan approach](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eowPka21BNc)and [send wave after wave of children running at shooters;](http://mediamatters.org/blog/2012/12/18/newsweeks-megan-mcardle-calls-for-children-to-b/191889) To be fair, this is a Libertarian stupid idea. I don’t think our Republican brethren would advocate sending their children to gang-rush someone with an automatic weapon. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897.md?page=394) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-republican-idea-of-the-day/490897.md?page=396)