# Stupid Things Said By Sportscasters **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 29, 2003, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932 "2003-03-29T00:37:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![mrweebles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/da6949/32.png) [@mrweebles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrweebles)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/41 "2003-04-01T15:46:28Z")
There’s a whole list of funny/stupid quotes from the sports world [here](http://http://www.dribbleglass.com/Jokes/sports.htm) ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/42 "2003-04-01T17:09:53Z")
Johnny Most, the longtime Boston Celtics radio man, was beloved by all for his outrageous partisanship - there was no more blindly passionate a C’s fan than ol’ Gravelmouth. He is reported to have once said, during a game with the hated Wilt Chamberlain and the Warriors, “I don’t believe it! Chamberlain has just hit Russell in the elbow with his eye! _And they’re calling it the other way!_” Gotta give sports guys a little credit, though, for knowing that announcing and interviewing are games, too. A comment about scoring more points than the other team was very likely made with little smirks on the faces of both the coach and the announcer. Just watch “Bull Durham” for the scene where veteran Kevin Costner is giving rookie Tim Robbins lessons in spouting cliches during interviews - that gets the point across. ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/43 "2003-04-01T17:15:46Z")
The NASCAR announcers (especially Dale Waltrip and Benny Parsons) are great ones for good-ol’-boy syntactical trainwrecks. They’re a hoot to listen to, especially when they get excited. One stuck out to me a few weeks back, when the race was in Las Vegas-- not because it was incorrect grammatically (or even factually), but because of how ill-considered it was: “Hey, D.W., someone might mistake you two for Siegfried & Roy!” **Waltrip (laughing):** “Hey, we’re not a couple-a queers!” ---
**Author:** ![RAWDuke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71e660/32.png) [@RAWDuke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RAWDuke)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2003, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/44 "2003-04-01T17:26:19Z")
My favorite is still Frank Quilicy, doing color commentary for the Minnesota Twins. Commenting on a pitcher for Baltimore: “He’s just like a surgeon, going after his prey.” ---
**Author:** ![beckwall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b487fb/32.png) [@beckwall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beckwall)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2003, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/45 "2003-04-02T00:27:30Z")
My fav Harry Caray-ism is from years ago. Watching a game and hearing him pronounce it _Hid-eo_ (rhymes with video) Nomo, I was amazed and amused because Nomo had been around for awhile. And Harry always sounded like he had highball in one hand and was chewing on something thick and gooey. God bless him. A well-known tennis analyst repeatedly saying _Stephanie_ Graf. Maybe that’s her full name, but for the sake of argument, let’s just keep calling her Steffi, ok buddy? I find Bill Walton a combination of intriguing and annoying. An oxymoron, if you like. When he starts his ramble about “that was a terrible call, and now the fans are streaming toward the court in outrage”, I usually get up and use the bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/46 "2003-04-02T00:48:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Beadalin \* > \*\*The NASCAR announcers (especially Dale Waltrip and Benny Parsons) are great ones for good-ol’-boy syntactical trainwrecks. They’re a hoot to listen to, especially when they get excited. One stuck out to me a few weeks back, when the race was in Las Vegas-- not because it was incorrect grammatically (or even factually), but because of how ill-considered it was: > > “Hey, D.W., someone might mistake you two for Siegfried & Roy!” > > **Waltrip (laughing):** “Hey, we’re not a couple-a queers!” \*\* His name is Darrell Waltrip. ---
**Author:** ![Winnowill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/4491bb/32.png) [@Winnowill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winnowill)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2003, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/47 "2003-04-02T00:59:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by RickJay \* > \*\*Brian Williams is the chief dude at CBC Sports, and he’s the anchorman for all the Olympic broadcasts and crap like that. A few years ago they tried him on baseball games. The results were… surreal. > > “It’s WELL HIT! DEEP TO RIGHT! And it’s caught by the second baseman right behind the base.” \*\* I heard someone else do the reverse - it was someone broadcasting an Indians game (but it may have been the other team’s announcers). The play-by-play went something like this, “And Omar Vizquel (the shortstop) is camped under the popup for an easy play…” and the color guy announces almost simultaneously, “And it’s a home run!” Turns out the play-by-play guy was not watching the field, but the monitor, which was showing footage of Omar standing there, glove up, but not going after anything - figured that meant that Omar was ready to make the catch. ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2003, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/48 "2003-04-02T02:42:59Z")
I once heard Brian Williams call a home run by staying completely silent. Then after a minute or so: “uh, a home run by Roberto Alomar” (or whoever the player was). He obviously wasn’t paying any attention to the game. Tommy Kendall, commenting on the CART race last month: “Paul Tracy is going to take off like a raped ape.” Then, after a brief pause: “Why are you looking at me like that? I said a ‘raped ape’”. A favorite from long ago is the time John McKeachie said, “The Whitecaps are behind the eight-ball, literally and figuratively”. Just so we are clear on this, they really were behind the eight-ball figuratively, but definitely _not_ behind any eigh-ball literally. ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2003, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932/49 "2003-04-02T02:57:44Z")
My favorite came from an post-game interview with a lineman who’d picked up a fumble and rumbled about 15 yards for a touchdown. Some newsman got his turn to ask a question. It was “Were you aware that this was your first-ever NFL touchdown?” The lineman said “Yes,” but the look on his face was eloquent, sort of “Can you believe the dumb-ass nonsense we have to put up with?” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-things-said-by-sportscasters/164932.md?page=2)