# Stupid Warning Labels
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924
**Category:** Factual Questions
**Created:** [March 18, 2002, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924 "2002-03-18T20:25:37Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Polski\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polski_King)
#### Post date: [March 18, 2002, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/1 "2002-03-18T20:25:37Z")
We’ve all seen them. Like Sony’s CD player “Not to be used as projectile”. They are getting stupider and stupider as law suits get stupider.
But is there a limit as to how stupid they can get? My friend said if he were to market his product, he’d put “Do not come within 100 miles of product.” So then he couldn’t be sued for anything. Is there some laws, in America or other countries that prohibits outragous labels like this?
Have there ever been labels that were turned down because of it? If so, what were they?
-P.K.
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### Author:  [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)
#### Post date: [March 18, 2002, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/2 "2002-03-18T21:48:16Z")
I have to say that I’ve started to somewhat doubt the veracity of these lists of amusing warnings that circulate by email, simply because they are associated by style with lists of ‘facts’ such as “a duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and nobody knows why”.
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### Author:  [@Niobium\_Knight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Niobium_Knight)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/3 "2002-03-19T00:16:27Z")
Is it true that a duck’s quack doesnt echo?
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### Author:  [@Robb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robb)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/4 "2002-03-19T00:34:04Z")
Thus sprach Cecil [Is it true a duck’s quack won’t echo?](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a5_071.html)
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### Author:  [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/5 "2002-03-19T00:47:45Z")
Wow. Completely hijacked in four posts. That’s gotta be some kind of record.
Dumb warning labels do indeed exist. Heck, [someone wrote a book about them](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0312195346/qid=919807100/002-0458260-6492857).
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### Author:  [@Robb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robb)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/6 "2002-03-19T01:21:36Z")
Maybe there should be some kind of a warning about what can happen to your OP.
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/7 "2002-03-19T08:57:39Z")
I think alot of them are intended to be jokes in the first place. Kind of like how so many commercials are trying to be funny nowadays (_trying_…) Like Miller Lite cans used to have a disclaimer that read something like: “Not all cans contain the same amount of bubbles. This is intentional and gives each Miller Lite it’s distinctive character.”
Does Sony really have a Cd Player that says “Not to be used as a projectile”? That must be some kind of joke.
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### Author:  [@Seven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seven)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 9:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/8 "2002-03-19T09:02:26Z")
I own a large audio mixing console -about 5 feet wide, 3 feet deep.
The instructions advise me to “not use this product in the shower or bathtub”.
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### Author:  [@tesseract](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tesseract)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 9:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/9 "2002-03-19T09:58:35Z")
I don’t know of any law prohibiting a label like that, and anyway, the first amendment probably wouldn’t allow the prohibition of such a label, unless perhaps the content of the label could be considered false or deceptive advertising.
So your friend probably could affix a label saying “Don’t come within 100 feet of this product,” but it wouldn’t do him/her any good in avoiding a products liability lawsuit. It would probably have an adverse affect on sales and contribute to bad PR, though.
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### Author:  [@struct](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/struct)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/10 "2002-03-19T13:49:40Z")
Two begged questions: 1) Would such an all-encompassing warning label be prohibited by the FTC? 2) Would the same successfully protect the product manufacturer from civil liability?
WARNING: THIS POST MAY CAUSE IMPOTENCE, DEATH, AND FREQUENT BOWEL MOVEMENTS AND AN URGENT NEED TO HAVE THEM.
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### Author:  [@Why\_A\_Duck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Why_A_Duck)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/11 "2002-03-19T13:52:20Z")
I keep waiting for **Jack Batty** and his amazing performing sig to show up here, but he isn’t taking the bait.
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### Author:  [@walor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/walor)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/12 "2002-03-19T15:52:19Z")
Try [here](http://paul.merton.ox.ac.uk/science/warnings.html) for an attempt to bring sanity to the crazy world of product label litigation.
pax 😉
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### Author:  [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/13 "2002-03-19T19:18:31Z")
Apparently, all-encompassing warnings are legal, since I have personally seen a disposable Bic lighter which was “not to be used near sources of heat or flame”. I’ve no clue how much liability protection that would provide, though.
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### Author:  [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/14 "2002-03-19T21:12:50Z")
Huh? What?
* * *
Go ahead and jump – the cape works fine.
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### Author:  [@ElwoodCuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElwoodCuse)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/15 "2002-03-19T23:06:55Z")
Not a warning label, but directions on a Bumble Bee can of tuna–
Tuna Salad
1 can Bumble Bee tuna
x chopped celery
x mayo
x bread
(Italics mine) Combine all ingredients _except bread_ in large bowl.
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### Author:  [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/16 "2002-03-19T23:31:43Z")
Does there remain a General Question here?
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### Author:  [@zev\_steinhardt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zev_steinhardt)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/17 "2002-03-19T23:43:16Z")
The [Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch](http://www.mlaw.org/) organization has a Wacky Warning Label contest every year.
The winners this past year were:
On a fireplace log: “Caution - Risk of Fire.”
Box of birthday candles: “DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity.”
On a 35mm camera: “When operating the selector dial with your eye to the viewfinder, care should be taken not to put your finger in your eye accidentally.”
Zev Steinhardt
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### Author:  [@SpoilerVirgin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpoilerVirgin)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/18 "2002-03-19T23:49:24Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by zev\_steinhardt \*
> **Box of birthday candles: “DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity.”**
I’m guessing this was an attempt to prevent people from using them for [ear candling](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a5_098.html)
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### Author:  [@CurtC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CurtC)
#### Post date: [March 19, 2002, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/19 "2002-03-19T23:49:52Z")
I was going through the manual of a product that is made by the company I work for. This product comes with a couple of fixtures for manipulating small devices to be measured, and each fixture had a small magnifying glass attached on a ball joint. The manual warns “Do not view the sun through the magnifying glass.”
This product and manual were developed in Japan, if that matters. I don’t know if it’s a joke (I doubt that), or their thinking that we Merkins sue over such ridiculous stuff that they need to put that in there.
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### Author:  [@Polski\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polski_King)
#### Post date: [March 20, 2002, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupid-warning-labels/98924/20 "2002-03-20T01:32:59Z")
Cisco- The Sony CD player was in the York Daily record, the usual papper in my area, and i think it is real
```
Manhatan- Does there remain a general question? Where do you suggest I post it?
```
-PK
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