# Stupidest Porn Spam Titles - what have you got in YOUR inbox? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 11, 2003, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948 "2003-01-11T13:26:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![monica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a183cd/32.png) [@monica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monica)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2003, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/41 "2003-02-04T22:49:03Z")
Just checked my inbox… Steamy Cow Sex Nude Celebs for FREE!! Never visit another adult site again Untold animals sex ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2003, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/42 "2003-02-04T23:14:59Z")
Seeing as how I need to clear out my Yahoo account anyway…lessee… **come lick my** The suspense! I must find out what I’ve been invited to lick! **Come play like a sultan.** Love the period for some reason. **Try neglected and lovely h o u s e w i f e s tonight!** Love the spacing of “housewifes” **Welcome to the most exciting poker room on the net**. (Alas, it really is about poker). **Men, double your contractions and duration with European Formula!** How did they know my water broke? ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2003, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/43 "2003-02-04T23:16:50Z")
Based on daily mail, I can have a **horse-sized penis** , and hook up with **transgender, married, teenage hotties, who also do the farm thing** , and become a **porn star** , in the process reducing my **mortgage payment** , and learning a new way to **make $1 per envelope** , without leaving the comfort of my home. I’m just not sure if my house is big enough for the women, horses, envelopes, and the zip code qualifying penis. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![DeadlyAccurate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ac91a4/32.png) [@DeadlyAccurate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeadlyAccurate)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/44 "2003-02-05T00:15:48Z")
Odd, but of the 44 currently in my spam filter, this was the only porn spam (at least with a recognizable title): Tight Pussies Stuffed Deep! The rest were all diplomas, mortages, free hovercraft toys, and so on. It’s usually about 50/50. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/45 "2003-02-05T01:50:54Z")
Well, digging through my spam box, I find mostly stock tips (like anyone’s going to pay attention to them _these_ days), and for some reason an upsurge of ‘419’ cash-advance scams, but also the following: \*\*Subject: Here’s your chance to get a pro-basketball player sized… \*\* Well, I suppose it’s better than the _anti_-basketball stuff. A look inside promoted **doctor-approved** on-penis gains of 2 to 4 inches. There’s no other way to say this: \ _ **Cite?!?** _ \ Then we have **FAST\_INCH\_LOSS\_2\_TO\_14\_INCHES\_IN\_ONE\_HOUR!truck** So does the inch loss depend on how fast the truck is going, or what? And won’t it cancel out the inch gains? And how about **emocionalne serpentibus sunspace don’t forget**. It promotes a free ‘financial report’, but it sounds more like a line from a song by **Enya** or **Dead Can Dance** … ---
**Author:** ![beegirl13](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/848f3c/32.png) [@beegirl13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beegirl13)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/46 "2003-02-05T02:40:01Z")
Here are the most interesting ones at the moment: RIP HER APART WITH YOUR C O C K! [kgkt3280] I’m sure she’ll appreciate that, especially with Valentine’s Day coming up and all that. How romantic. pussy Short and to the point at least… ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/47 "2003-02-05T02:51:11Z")
**Subject: \< Wow support, its Kara, erotic babe \> @aack9561** \*\*Subject: \<\< Hey support, I am Adelia, sexual cat \>\> @1YMTU3NC1hYWNrOTU2MQ%3D%3D \*\* \*\*Subject: \<\<\< Hey sweetie support, I am Francheska, libidinous blonde \>\>\> K7Xs@aack9561 \*\* **Subject: Nasty Sex With Animals… Never Seen Before! …kvupy 842225 yrhwcycilh** contents: Patrice is a beautiful eastern european girl who knows how to suck off a horse ---
**Author:** ![Arcangues181](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/cab0a1/32.png) [@Arcangues181](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arcangues181)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/48 "2003-02-05T02:51:30Z")
Aw, man, **beegirl** , you took mine. Oh well, there’s still: _Secret Eminem Sex Tape_ _ENLARGE YOUR TOOL GUARANTEED OR YOUR MONEY BACK…_ I remember getting porn e-mails from lovely characters like DRINK\_MY\_JUICES\_2193 and things like that. Sometimes the names are just as good as the subject lines. ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/49 "2003-02-05T04:36:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by racer72 \* > \*\*I still remember this one from a few years ago. The from box said the email was from Dorothy. The subject box said “I want to give you a blowjob!”. What makes this disturbing to me is Dorothy was my mother’s name. \*\* Dorothy is my GRANDMA’S name. Thank God I’m a girl! ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/50 "2003-02-05T05:16:48Z")
RIP HER APART WITH YOUR C O C K! Oh, yeah… **there’s** a lovely visual :gag: ---
**Author:** ![Zazie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Zazie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zazie)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/51 "2003-02-05T14:24:13Z")
Oh I just got that one too “RIP HER APART”! Geez… and College girls being naughty on Spring Break… So boring huh?! ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/52 "2003-02-05T14:36:36Z")
“Subject: Liuve sluts Free. terkwbt xtjapqos” uh…😕 ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/53 "2003-02-05T15:03:33Z")
I just got a couple of good consecutive ones: What is J.Lo telling Ben for Valentine’s Day? Farm Sex! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Stranger\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@The\_Stranger\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Stranger_1)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/54 "2003-02-05T17:43:36Z")
“Sherita Thornsbury” (LOL at that name) wants me to know that I can have: “PICS!PICS!PICS! of Teensluts in Bondage doing unnaturel acts!” Never mind the “naturel” (Sic)… How, if they’re tied up, are they performing unnatural acts? Never mind, I don’t want to know. ---
**Author:** ![Pucky\_Schumer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@Pucky\_Schumer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pucky_Schumer)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948/55 "2003-02-05T18:51:54Z")
Sequential spam from today: Add 3 inches in only 2 weeks eq Confirm: Rates Aren’t Going Lower ladies upsize your man this works Post-Christmas Blow-Out Sale I was tempted to open the cut-off one that said Would You Like to Obtain a fully recognized Univer Maybe I could obtain a fully recognized Universe? By email no less. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-porn-spam-titles-what-have-you-got-in-your-inbox/147948.md?page=2)