# Stupidest solution to TV mystries/crimes? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 16, 2018, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948 "2018-02-16T19:24:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/21 "2018-02-17T00:49:58Z")
> [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#): > > Perry planted the gun! (After committing the murder? :eek: ) From what I recall, the victim was killed in his car during a robbery. This happened not far from the suspect’s apartment, and the perp simply dumped the gun in the first available place (the trash can). How Perry was able to finger the true killer, I don’t remember. ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/22 "2018-02-17T01:38:32Z")
I think in the pilot episode of Jonathan Creek, the killer did it with their toes. They had the killer’s toe prints because he/she stepped on a scale earlier on. It was lame. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/23 "2018-02-17T01:52:20Z")
> [@Robot\_Arm](#): > > Is that you, Hamilton? > [@terentii](#): > > Your Honor, this is irrelevant, immaterial, and entirely unprofessional! :mad: Della says ‘hi’. ---
**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/24 "2018-02-17T21:45:46Z")
Batman meets a new rich man who moved to Gotham named Mr. Alucard and is suspicious of his motives due to a coincidental sudden rise in crime but doesn’t have proof until he writes ALUCARD on a piece of paper and accidentally points it at a mirror so it reads DRACULA and cracks the case. The problem is that in order to see DRACULA in the mirror he has to have written ALUCARD mirrored in the first place otherwise it would still be mirrored. ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/25 "2018-02-17T22:00:58Z")
A _Sherlock_ episode: The (potential) murderer’s technique was to push a shiv through a military man’s tight uniform belt. The idea was that the tight band kept the victim from feeling the dagger penetrate him, and death by exsanguination only happened when he took the tight belt off that night when undressing. Sherlock guessed this because an earlier uniformed guy almost bled to death from an unfelt wound in his side. He deduced that the earlier guy was just a practice victim. It’s too stupid to think that a tight belt would prevent you from feeling the pain of being stabbed. I remember spraining my eyes by rolling them the night I watched that episode. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/26 "2018-02-17T22:42:01Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > Batman meets a new rich man who moved to Gotham named Mr. Alucard and is suspicious of his motives due to a coincidental sudden rise in crime but doesn’t have proof until he writes ALUCARD on a piece of paper and accidentally points it at a mirror so it reads DRACULA and cracks the case. > > The problem is that in order to see DRACULA in the mirror he has to have written ALUCARD mirrored in the first place otherwise it would still be mirrored. That reminds me of something from the animated series. One of the writers got hooked into that old wives’ tale “you can’t read in a dream because reading and dreaming are functions of different sides of the brain” and included that as a significant clue in an episode. ---
**Author:** ![MrAtoz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@MrAtoz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrAtoz)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/27 "2018-02-17T23:04:33Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > Batman meets a new rich man who moved to Gotham named Mr. Alucard and is suspicious of his motives due to a coincidental sudden rise in crime but doesn’t have proof until he writes ALUCARD on a piece of paper and accidentally points it at a mirror so it reads DRACULA and cracks the case. > > The problem is that in order to see DRACULA in the mirror he has to have written ALUCARD mirrored in the first place otherwise it would still be mirrored. I really wish people would stop using “Alucard” as a mysterious alias for “Dracula.” It wasn’t all that clever when they did it in Son of Dracula back in 1943, and it hasn’t gotten any better since then. ---
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/28 "2018-02-17T23:11:00Z")
> [@Skywatcher](#): > > That reminds me of something from the animated series. One of the writers got hooked into that old wives’ tale “you can’t read in a dream because reading and dreaming are functions of different sides of the brain” and included that as a significant clue in an episode. I remember that one! ---
**Author:** ![Andy\_L](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c67d28/32.png) [@Andy\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Andy_L)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/29 "2018-02-17T23:12:02Z")
> [@MrAtoz](#): > > I really wish people would stop using “Alucard” as a mysterious alias for “Dracula.” It wasn’t all that clever when they did it in Son of Dracula back in 1943, and it hasn’t gotten any better since then. How about Coach-feratu [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBOfj61PWCo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBOfj61PWCo) ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/30 "2018-02-17T23:57:43Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Not specific, but a general trend I’ve seen in CSI: convenient clues. > > “That paint chip is from a brand of paint that’s only sold in one paint store in the city.” How convenient! > > At paint store: “Did you sell this paint to anyone in the last three weeks?” “Why, yes. Just once. I remember the customer. He came in last Tuesday at 4:45. I have his home address.” How convenient! > > I realize they have to dramatize things and do things to keep things interesting, but this trope was used far too often. Yet things like this happen in real life. It’s how many bad guys have been caught. A notable example is the Leopold & Loeb case. Leopold [left his spectacles](http://www.famous-trials.com/leopoldandloeb/1748-glasses)at the scene of the crime. _Leopold’s prescription may have been a very common one and the frames were ordinary too, except for a patented hinge connecting the earpiece to the nosepiece. The hinge was manufactured by a New York company that had only one outlet in Chicago: Almer Coe & Co. Especially unfortunate for Leopold was the fact that Almer Coe had sold only three pairs of glasses with the patented hinge. One belonged to a lady, a second pair belonged to an attorney (Jerome Frank, who, nearly thirty years later as a federal appellate judge, would deny the final plea of Juilius and Ethel Rosenberg for a stay of their executions) traveling in Europe, and the third belonged to Leopold. It was a matter of a few days before detective work on the glasses led police back to Nathan Leopold._ ---
**Author:** ![Jim\_s\_Son](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19adc/32.png) [@Jim\_s\_Son](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jim_s_Son)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/31 "2018-02-18T00:19:43Z")
A 1997 episode “A Trace of Murder” where Lt Columbo must deal with a police forensics expert who is helping a woman frame her husband for murder. Columbo realizes the two know each other because 1) at a coffee shop the expert pushes the sugar bowl towards her because he knows she uses sugar in her tea and 2) when she approaches an automobile he opens the front door because he knows she gets car sick. Seems to me a sugar bowl is ordinary kindness and I can remember as teenagers the people I were with invariably yelled “I got shotgun” (right front seat) when we got in a car. ---
**Author:** ![E-DUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/e-dub/32/403_2.png) [@E-DUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-DUB)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/32 "2018-02-18T00:55:03Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > Batman meets a new rich man who moved to Gotham named Mr. Alucard and is suspicious of his motives due to a coincidental sudden rise in crime but doesn’t have proof until he writes ALUCARD on a piece of paper and accidentally points it at a mirror so it reads DRACULA and cracks the case. > > The problem is that in order to see DRACULA in the mirror he has to have written ALUCARD mirrored in the first place otherwise it would still be mirrored. I didn’t think you could see DRACULA in a mirror. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/33 "2018-02-18T01:57:01Z")
> [@Peter\_Morris](#): > > Yet things like this happen in real life. It’s how many bad guys have been caught. A notable example is the Leopold & Loeb case. Leopold [left his spectacles](http://www.famous-trials.com/leopoldandloeb/1748-glasses)at the scene of the crime. > > _Leopold’s prescription may have been a very common one and the frames were ordinary too, except for a patented hinge connecting the earpiece to the nosepiece. The hinge was manufactured by a New York company that had only one outlet in Chicago: Almer Coe & Co. Especially unfortunate for Leopold was the fact that Almer Coe had sold only three pairs of glasses with the patented hinge. One belonged to a lady, a second pair belonged to an attorney (Jerome Frank, who, nearly thirty years later as a federal appellate judge, would deny the final plea of Juilius and Ethel Rosenberg for a stay of their executions) traveling in Europe, and the third belonged to Leopold. It was a matter of a few days before detective work on the glasses led police back to Nathan Leopold._ The fact that it happens IRL does it excuse it as a sloppy writing crutch, especially if it happens every episode. Re Agatha Christie’s gathering of the suspects: it’s a fun and dramatic trope, and the clues she brings up have always been shown previously. A reader has all the information available and could come to the same conclusion as the detective. Ellery Queen would even stop the story with a challenge to the reader when all the clues had been introduced, daring you to solve the mystery. ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/34 "2018-02-18T05:47:56Z")
> [@E-DUB](#): > > I didn’t think you could see DRACULA in a mirror. Ha! “Scrubs” famously had several references to a screenplay that JD was writing called “Dr. Acula” ---
**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 8:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/35 "2018-02-18T08:01:10Z")
> [@Mahaloth](#): > > I think in the pilot episode of Jonathan Creek, the killer did it with their toes. They had the killer’s toe prints because he/she stepped on a scale earlier on. It was lame. I can remember many an eye roll watching creek but for some reason the only one that comes to mind right now was the most recent Christmas special: The victim, in his death throws, sort of waggles his eyes. Later, creek realizes that the victim was rapidly looking between a PHONE on the table and the letter Y on a poster outside. Therefore he was clearly trying to indicate that one of the people in the room at the time was a PHONEY. :smack: You would have thought just staring at the guy would be more natural, and more obvious a clue (or just telling us…But I can’t remember whether he could speak/move) ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/36 "2018-02-18T13:11:05Z")
Besides which, how would that even be a useful clue? That could mean, for instance, that they pretended to be a real friend but weren’t, which wouldn’t be a huge revelation. And _which_ person in the room? Heck, maybe he was trying to say that Creek was a phony detective, an interpretation which certainly seems supported. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/37 "2018-02-18T15:39:06Z")
In a previous life I used to operate printing presses before the entire industry became obsolete. There’s still a couple of times I catch some really stupid assumptions about how printing is done in these procedurals. In and episode of _Sherlock_, Sherlock decides a desk jockey is bogus because his certificate is printed on the wrong weight of paper. This he deduced just by glancing at the certificate in a glass frame, hanging on the wall about 5 feet away. First, there is no one weight of paper for awards. Anything from 24# upward will do. Second, it’s difficult to guess the weight of paper behind a glass pane without taking it out. If it’s printed on newsprint, it’s pretty obvious, but heavier than 20# is not so obvious. In _NCIS LA_, Callen goes undercover as a counterfeiter. Hetty gives him the printing manuals to memorize overnight, then asks him a trick question on the propulsion system or something. He then meets up with the bad guys and starts printing bogus money for them. No. A thousand times no. You can’t just memorize a manual and operate a printing press right away. It takes months of practice, and that’s just for a one color press. There’s a zillion factors you have to consider to make a press run efficiently, and you don’t start using expensive paper off the bat. You use cheap paper, check for stray marks, ink creepage, registry, etc and so on. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/38 "2018-02-18T15:53:10Z")
I would allow that clue only if it came from the death of Danny Rebus on the _Electric Company_ reboot. (eta the one in #35 and #36–there was another post while I was typing.) ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/39 "2018-02-18T17:16:07Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Not specific, but a general trend I’ve seen in CSI: convenient clues. > > “That paint chip is from a brand of paint that’s only sold in one paint store in the city.” How convenient! > > At paint store: “Did you sell this paint to anyone in the last three weeks?” “Why, yes. Just once. I remember the customer. He came in last Tuesday at 4:45. I have his home address.” How convenient! > > I realize they have to dramatize things and do things to keep things interesting, but this trope was used far too often. [“The New York City bartender who recognizes _everybody_ that’s ever been in the bar, _ever._”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-HKy4bVKD1w) “Which New York City do _you_ work in? I live, there, I _live_ with people I don’t recognize.” ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948/40 "2018-02-18T19:47:15Z")
Is it cheating to bring up _Scorpion_? The show is a smorgasbord of stupid, but my very favorite was when they took a wet-vac to a hot spring to gather some gas needed for the plan (hydrogen sulfide maybe? doesn’t matter, it’s _Scorpion_, so the odds of it being an actual solution to the problem presented are slim). They turned the vacuum on, sucked up some gas, turned it off, then drove back to the disaster site. You know, if they had even attached a trash bag to the exhaust port and brought the gas back that way, it would have at least waved at possible as it drove by - but they stored the gas in the dust bin of the vacuum cleaner. On the plus side, Katharine McPhee was naked in the hot spring (because the hot spring was located in a nudist camp) (although of course they only showed her from the back). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidest-solution-to-tv-mystries-crimes/808948.md?page=3)