# Stupidity reaches a new zenith **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 4, 2003, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558 "2003-09-04T17:30:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![GaWd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f08c70/32.png) [@GaWd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaWd)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/21 "2003-09-04T20:34:19Z")
> [@](#): > > I SAID BUD LIGHT!! BwaHaHaHa šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/22 "2003-09-04T21:19:56Z")
While I believe that females are equally disposed to being dumbasses, they lack the testosterone induced ā€˜idiot geneā€™. As such, they are natural cheerleaders, and watch the weakest of the species skim themselves from the breeding pool. Sometimes I have to wonder how we have survived and grown in number. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/23 "2003-09-04T21:33:41Z")
While I agree that shooting fireworks out of oneā€™s ass is an unbelievably stupid thing to do, I also have to confess that I laughed insanely when I saw the idiots in the _Jackass_ movie shooting fireworks out of their asses. šŸ˜ƒ (And I know Iā€™m not the only one) ---
**Author:** ![Caught\_Work](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/919ad9/32.png) [@Caught\_Work](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caught_Work)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/24 "2003-09-05T04:09:10Z")
This guy has done us all a favour by removing himself from the gene pool and not being able to sire any more morons. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/25 "2003-09-05T04:43:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LilyoftheValley \* > \*\* > [beavis] > FIRE! FIRE FIRE!!! huh huh > [/beavis] \*\* Hehahaheeā€¦yeah. ā€œFIRE IN THE HOLE!!!ā€ This story completely blew me away. Seriously, am I going to hell for laughing my ass off at this one? šŸ˜› ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/26 "2003-09-05T05:40:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by township \* > \*\*Well, I been thinking about you guys who wouldnā€™t fall down with a firecracker up your ass and I guess my question is; > > does that mean that when you got a firecracker up your ass you are like really careful? \*\* If I had a firecracker up my ass you can bet I would be _damn_ careful šŸ˜› ---
**Author:** ![Skeezix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/839c29/32.png) [@Skeezix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skeezix)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/27 "2003-09-05T07:44:02Z")
Seems to that if youā€™ve got a lit firecracker up your ass at all, at some point in the day you obviously werenā€™t careful enough. ---
**Author:** ![township](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f475e1/32.png) [@township](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/township)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/28 "2003-09-05T13:29:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Skeezix \* > \*\*Seems to that if youā€™ve got a lit firecracker up your ass at all, at some point in the day you obviously werenā€™t careful enough. \*\* What do you mean? Like getting the firecracker up your ass sideways? ---
**Author:** ![sirtonyh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ad7895/32.png) [@sirtonyh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sirtonyh)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/29 "2003-09-05T16:51:30Z")
He was an Aussie. No further explanation required šŸ˜‰ > [@](#): > > **"We do caution people strongly against following these acts," - Senior Sergeant John Klepczarek** and the prize for stating the blindingly obvious goes to ā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![coffeecat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/coffeecat/32/3405_2.png) [@coffeecat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/coffeecat)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/30 "2003-09-05T16:52:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LilyoftheValley \* > **Iā€™m trying not to sound sexist here, but why is it when I read of stories of people doing stupid stunts like this, Iā€™ve never read of it being a woman? Is there a male proclivity for stupid stunts?** Women compete to date the guy with the firecracker up his ass. ---
**Author:** ![lauramarlane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a5b964/32.png) [@lauramarlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lauramarlane)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/31 "2003-09-05T17:04:35Z")
I think the female equivalent of this would be all those college girls who thought being in the Girls Gone Wild video would be a great idea. ---
**Author:** ![township](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f475e1/32.png) [@township](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/township)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/32 "2003-09-05T17:35:31Z")
Well, one thing is for sure; the world would not be nearly as interesting a place if we didnā€™t have the occasional individual who not only put a firecracker up his ass and was so clumsy (actually I suspect some sort of mind-altering substance was involved) that he sat on it. I salute you, Mr. Firecracker up-the-ass guy. ---
**Author:** ![Epimetheus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c4cdca/32.png) [@Epimetheus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Epimetheus)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/33 "2003-09-05T17:36:24Z")
Anecdote time: A guy on a local radio station did a stunt like this a year ago. (or was it this year?) Anyway, for 100 dollars the DJā€™s convinced him to stick a roman candle in his butthole (note, not between cheecks, actually sticking out) and fire them off. He did it. Donā€™t believe me? [Click here](http://www.corporateradiosucksass.com/tbonetricks/rimrocket/rimrocket.html). Beware for those at work or on private networks that are monitored, this page contains some graphic scenes such as nudity. ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/34 "2003-09-05T17:37:35Z")
Iā€™m waiting for some astute legislator to recognize the need for more descriptive warning labels for fireworks. Who knows, the next Roman candle you buy may read: _Warning! Do not place in mouth or anus_ ---
**Author:** ![The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dc4da7/32.png) [@The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_With_The_Golden_Gun)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/35 "2003-09-05T18:48:32Z")
Waverly, I think thereā€™s already fireworks with the warning ā€œDo not put in mouth.ā€ ---
**Author:** ![LilyoftheValley](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/54ee81/32.png) [@LilyoftheValley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LilyoftheValley)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/36 "2003-09-05T19:29:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Waverly \* > \*\*Iā€™m waiting for some astute legislator to recognize the need for more descriptive warning labels for fireworks. Who knows, the next Roman candle you buy may read: > > _Warning! Do not place in mouth or anus_ \*\* What about ears or nostrils?? ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/37 "2003-09-05T19:43:29Z")
No, itā€™s Wedding Rings that need warnings about nostrils. Or havenā€™t you been reading MPSIMS? ---
**Author:** ![Tusculan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecd19e/32.png) [@Tusculan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tusculan)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/38 "2003-09-05T20:00:19Z")
Ah, so _that_ā€™s what the elven script on The Ring says: ā€œwarning: do not put up nostrilā€! Tell me again why they had to make three three-hour movies about it? ---
**Author:** ![El\_Cid\_Viscoso](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/41988e/32.png) [@El\_Cid\_Viscoso](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Cid_Viscoso)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/39 "2003-09-05T20:22:01Z")
I have a _friend_ who, in high school, tried to light a fart whilst wearing fancy parachute pants. Whatever parachute pants were made of, they donā€™t really **burn** , they just sort of melt. Down there. Last I heard, his taint looks like a waffle cone. NSFW Warning: see a [fart-lighting accident](http://www.geocities.com/insomniac_with_mono2/videos.html) in action. (Itā€™s a Zipped file; as always, use caution with compressed files.) ---
**Author:** ![LilyoftheValley](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/54ee81/32.png) [@LilyoftheValley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LilyoftheValley)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2003, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558/40 "2003-09-05T21:25:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Homebrew \* > \*\*No, itā€™s Wedding Rings that need warnings about nostrils. Or havenā€™t you been reading MPSIMS? \*\* Hmmmā€¦must have missed that thread. Now youā€™ve got me dying for a **link**. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-reaches-a-new-zenith/199558.md?page=3)