# Stupidity you have heard **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 4, 2014, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761 "2014-08-04T05:07:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/61 "2014-08-05T17:21:08Z")
> [@Valgard](#): > > The owner of the dropzone that my college skydiving club trained at took me aside one time and said that she was worried about one of the exchange students who was in class, “I think there may be a language problem”. > > I told her that he was from Scotland. Then I had to tell her that they speak English there. She looked at me rather incredulously. > > (This was in Indiana) I went to high school with a young man from Liverpool. He once related a stort of his Scottish grandfather visiting, and at dinner, speaking in an incomprehensible burr. In order to not appear i,polite, the family would make vague sounds of agreement whenever he spoke. What was mysterious was that he became progressively more agitated as the meal continued. Finally, he slapped his hand against the table top and said, as distinctly as he was able: “Would ye all stop yer mutterin’ and pass the damn butter?” ---
**Author:** ![RobDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f07891/32.png) [@RobDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RobDog)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/62 "2014-08-05T17:37:54Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > To be honest, I had to look that up. The fact that it had no capitalization made me think it had something to do with biology. I don’t believe I’ve ever heard the term before though; wouldn’t most people just refer to it as the digestive tract? OK, confession… my “teammate” was me, and that makes me feel better 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/63 "2014-08-05T17:50:22Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > “Um, no actually, “paralyzed” and “petrified” are not in fact synonyms.” Or that a lot of people who use wheelchairs actually can walk a little. They just walk with pain, or exhaustion, or are in danger of falling and not being able to get back up. I’m amused when a certain friend of mine gets up and steps from her chair to a chair at a restaurant, or stands briefly to get something from a shelf in a store. People actually audibly gasp sometimes. A lot of people in Indiana think that the word “Baptist,” the denomination, is spelled “Babtist,” and cannot be convinced otherwise. I get asked a lot if Jews still sacrifice animals in synagogues. People also frequently ask me if Deaf people are allowed to drive, then, as a follow-up question, if they can park in handicapped parking spaces. A guidance counselor at my high school put a new student from South Africa in remedial English, because the counselor didn’t know people from South Africa speak English. ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/64 "2014-08-05T17:56:32Z")
I think I’ve posted it on the boards here before, but it’s worth repeating. I was talking with my college-bound cousin and one of her friends, so they were both probably 17 or 18 years old. I asked my cousin if she had thought about what her major would be. She replied “I’m not sure, but probably something in the liberal arts”. Her friend turns, jaw agape, and says “You mean, like, karate?” ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Woo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7c8e57/32.png) [@Dr.Woo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Woo)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/65 "2014-08-05T18:16:04Z")
I once went into a doughnut place and ordered a dozen of them. The counter person asked me what “a dozen” was, so I helpfully filled her in on the facts, then left with my 24 doughnuts. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/66 "2014-08-05T18:36:35Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > I’ll see that and raise you my high school Algebra II teacher who was amazed to learn that pi was not exactly 22/7. Continuing on the list of “teachers who shouldn’t have been”, my 6th grade math teacher. We had to memorize a demo for the first time; those of us with analytical mindsets were having serious trouble with it. I asked “how do I know what the next step is, other than ‘just learn it’? There has to be some reason it’s that step and not another one!” Her answer: “stop trying to look for logic. There is no logic in mathematics.” “Spain? Ah, yes, right next to Colombia!” (at least he got that there is a relationship with a Colomb-something) being threatened with calling the cops on me for having a Visa type which was not in a rentacop-turned-receptionist’s list (the list included H-1A and H-1B, but those are different pathways to get the same type of visa, an H-1) that banker who insisted that foreigners can’t have US SSNs and if I did have one then I was an American citizen that HR person who was surprised to find out that people get different SSNs from the SSs of different countries, a Spaniard-born-in-Venezuela coworker who almost got thrown to the floor by our simultaneous responses of “that’s a movie, you idiot!” after claiming that the moon landings were faked a Spanish property agent who tried to apply sales law to a rental, and several agents (multiple nationalities, or at least calling from different countries) who have told me that a Dutch company cannot hire the services of a non-Dutch one. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/67 "2014-08-05T18:38:12Z")
Had a coworker recently tell me Obama gave NASA the the Muslims. Told me I’d know if I spent less time on porn web sites. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/68 "2014-08-05T19:14:00Z")
> [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](#): > > Told me I’d know if I spent less time on porn web sites. We can’t _all_ be geniuses! ---
**Author:** ![UncleMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e0b2c6/32.png) [@UncleMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleMoose)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/69 "2014-08-05T19:25:08Z")
Late night talk show some 40 years or so ago: Caller: There is absolutey no possible way to get rid of radioactive material safely, now or in the future. Host: Well we might get to the point where we could drop it into the sun. Caller: OK, so now you want to make the Sun radioactive! ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/70 "2014-08-05T19:34:48Z")
> [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](#): > > Had a coworker recently tell me Obama gave NASA the the Muslims. Told me I’d know if I spent less time on porn web sites. “Gave NASA to the Muslims”? Obviously ridiculous. Obama DID tell NASA director Charles Bolden that improving the self-esteem of Muslims ranked among NASA’s highest priorities. That strikes me as merely silly, but a lot of conservative commentators found it utterly outrageous, and lashed out at the President for it. It’s probable that some of them exaggerated or distorted what Obama actually said, and that your friend picked up some variation on it. [http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2010/07/white-house-nasa-defend-comments-about-nasa-outreach-to-muslim-world-criticized-by-conservatives/](http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/politics/2010/07/white-house-nasa-defend-comments-about-nasa-outreach-to-muslim-world-criticized-by-conservatives/) ---
**Author:** ![LaurenIpsum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@LaurenIpsum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LaurenIpsum)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/71 "2014-08-05T19:47:10Z")
My real name is not Lauren, but I was named after one of the actresses from Charlie’s Angels. My sister, who was about 10 when my mom was pregnant, watched the show and suggested the name to her. I mentioned to an acquaintance that my sister watched Charlie’s Angels and suggested the name to my mom. Her reply, “Is she an older or younger sister?” There was a beat while I wondered if she was joking, and when I saw she wasn’t, I managed to choke out, “Older, I mean, how could a younger sister have suggested a name when my mom was pregnant with me?” Her reply: “Well, she could have watched Charlie’s Angels in reruns.” :smack::smack::smack::smack::smack: ---
**Author:** ![Filbert](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/filbert/32/3433_2.png) [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/72 "2014-08-05T19:52:26Z")
> [@Aspenglow](#): > > I hear you on the fertilized eggs. I don’t keep roosters. Which leads me to another stupid thing someone said: “I thought you needed roosters for chickens to lay eggs…??” > > Um, no. Not that daft really- a lot of bird species normally need a male present to trigger nesting or egg laying, chickens are unusual in their egg laying habits. Not me, but my mother was once asked by a normal looking middle aged woman if monkeys laid eggs. I’ve seen a parent getting very angry at a small child (who was holding a snake at the time), because he said he could feel the bones, and “Snakes don’t have bones, stupid!” ---
**Author:** ![winneee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a88e4f/32.png) [@winneee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/winneee)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/73 "2014-08-05T21:00:36Z")
So after I got married, I had to add my married name to my passport. Went through the whole rigmarole - sent my passport away to passport gods and it magically returned with my married name added to the back page or something. Next trip out if the country, the kiosk wouldn’t read my passport. We showed the attendant my ticket and official, passport agency made name change at the back to which she sighed and said, “You have to get this changed through the passport agency.” Okaaaaaaay… ---
**Author:** ![Whiskey\_Dickens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/9fc348/32.png) [@Whiskey\_Dickens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whiskey_Dickens)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/74 "2014-08-05T21:06:44Z")
A video rental clerk in RI asked for a driver’s license to set up an account, and I gave her my Alberta (Canada) driver’s license. “This is a weird license!” “I’m Canadian!” “I’ve never met someone from… Canadia?” I thought to myself “you still haven’t!” ---
**Author:** ![gwendee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/35a633/32.png) [@gwendee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gwendee)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/75 "2014-08-05T21:17:35Z")
In a waiting room I was seated across from what my brain decided was a 13 or 14 year old boy and his grandmother. The young man was wearing a large ornate pendant and the woman said it looked like something Henry VIII would wear. She then told him that Henry cut off his wives’ heads. She: …and that’s why they call him Henry the 8th He: Why? She: Because he cut off eight of their heads. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/76 "2014-08-05T21:17:40Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > We can’t _all_ be geniuses! I forgot to add: when the subject of Muslims came up, another coworker informed us that they were planning to build a Koran at Ground Zero. ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/77 "2014-08-05T21:42:35Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > That Catholics aren’t Christian. My Holy Roller grandmother hated Catholics because they pray to idols. ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/78 "2014-08-05T22:22:06Z")
Actual Email exchange from a middleware Developer client and me: Client: “The new Help files are very bland, have plain typewriter-looking text, are very heavily indented, have no artwork or screenshots at all, and have nonsense text in brackets everywhere.” Me: “Did you perhaps open those HTML files in Notepad?” Client: “OK, the problem appears to have been fixed.” Once again, that was a Developer client. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/79 "2014-08-05T22:27:51Z")
I get this one rather infrequently actually: ME: I can’t eat dairy. So no food with milk in it. OTHER PERSON: This has eggs in it, is that ok? ---
**Author:** ![chiroptera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2014, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761/80 "2014-08-05T22:33:08Z")
Remembered anotherone, fromthe mid 1990s. Colin Powell and Jesse Jackson were doing a series of debates, and tickets were available through Ticketmaster and such venues. This was before everything was online, so I called the 800 number [del] bimbo [/del] customer service representative to purchase tickets. “Hi, I’d like to order two tickets to the Colin Powell - Jesse Jackson debate at \ on \ please.” “OK. Is that a band? I’ve never heard of them.” :smack: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/stupidity-you-have-heard/694761.md?page=5)