# Subtle signs that someone is deviant **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 13, 2011, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203 "2011-09-13T21:15:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Sudden\_Kestrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecd19e/32.png) [@Sudden\_Kestrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sudden_Kestrel)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/61 "2011-09-14T05:10:03Z")
I’m really happy to know I’m a deviant, if these are the criteria. All of you nondeviants can stay out in the midday sun with your cell phones and purpose-driven walking and compulsion to buy things at malls, but I bet all of the deviants are having more fun behind their tinted windows (especially amputee-porn guy :D). ---
**Author:** ![Scissorjack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/62 "2011-09-14T05:49:55Z")
Sticking lollipops up your bum and handing them out around school gates. ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/63 "2011-09-14T11:44:47Z")
> [@even\_sven](#): > > Oh come on, there is a difference between “throwing on jeans and a tee-shirt and running to the corner store looking somewhat tousled” and “stumbling around haggard and red-eyed and red nosed with scabby chapped lips, with mascara smudged into deep circles around the eyes, with a $.99 Store acrylic beanie half-covering my limp, greasy, tangled hair, while walking around braless in a huge Garfield tee-shirt with a mustard stain on it and a hole in the armpit and my boyfriend’s sweat pants that basically fit like a puddle.” > > If I’m sick and running to the store for some NyQuil, you’re gonna get the latter. And yeah, if you hit on that it’s a pretty big sign that something weird is going on in your head. > > For me- if you primarily listen to trance or house music- especially if they listen to it outside of a club setting. I know you all are going to tell me “No, I’m a public defender and I LOVE trance music!,” but in my experience people into these genres tend to be unreliable at best. Mustard stains can be hot. But then again I haven’t “hit on” anyone in more than 25 years, female, male, shemale, hemale, itmale or whatmale. And I think that people who spend too much time and effort on their appearance are probably deviants. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/64 "2011-09-14T11:55:31Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > Futhermore, I’m a butch lesbian that looks like a 14 year old boy. I’m having a real hard time not writing you off as just some man-hater who thinks all guys are rapists waiting for their chance to strike. ---
**Author:** ![Bridget\_Burke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7cd45c/32.png) [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/65 "2011-09-14T12:50:30Z")
I’m here to object to the sloppy [use of language](http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?allowed_in_frame=0&search=deviate&searchmode=none). I mean, _deviant_? If you just want to list things you, personally, find creepy–OK. But people who seriously use the word deviant would definitely use it to describe a “butch lesbian.” (And the sane people here would consider them ignorant bigots.) Getting hit on _can_ be annoying but it’s really narrow-minded to object to people being out at odd hours. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/66 "2011-09-14T15:26:56Z")
> [@](#): > > -People who give half-sided smiles. > > -People who wander around aimlessly in stores and malls, without any obvious purpose. These _must_ be true because they describe me. ---
**Author:** ![Snake\_Plissken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@Snake\_Plissken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snake_Plissken)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/67 "2011-09-14T16:19:45Z")
> [@monstro](#): > > I walk through neighborhoods all the time. I do it because I like to walk and look at things that I would miss passing by in a car. > > It’s not the most normal behavior, I admit, but deviant? Please. > > There are lot of things people do that are normal but make no sense. Like, I save a ton of money by walking instead of driving, while also getting my daily exercise. So it makes sense for me to walk. But I know it’s not normal. I’ve always tended to be more interested in rationality than conventionality. > > Getting hit on while being “dressed down”. A guy may not know that you are “dressed down”. Or they may be drawn to that. It may be “deviant”, but I sure wish more guys were like this. I’m exactly the same way. My kids usually have all the cars, and all that walking keeps the gut in check. …and I dont think I’ve ever hit on a woman dressed to the nines. When I first hit on my wife in college, she was a sweaty mess, having just finished volleyball practice. ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/68 "2011-09-14T16:29:19Z")
I must have my humor-o-meter set to ultra sensitive because I read the OP in the spirit of just jokin’ around, tongue in cheek. ---
**Author:** ![SecretaryofEvil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@SecretaryofEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecretaryofEvil)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/69 "2011-09-14T17:30:45Z")
> [@Ura-Maru](#): > > – > A heraldry joke. Because I’m that fucking topical. The boar is on special tonight, don’t forget to tip your serving wench, the garderobe is next to the gatehouse. This made me laugh. 🙂 Getting back to the OP, one thing I definitely find creepy (deviant really isn’t the right word) is when someone constantly finds innocuous behaviors creepy. In my experience, people like that are usually bat shit, and you should avoid them. ---
**Author:** ![overlyverbose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/9dc877/32.png) [@overlyverbose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/overlyverbose)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/70 "2011-09-14T17:41:24Z")
My take on deviance: - if I don’t know you and you’re loitering around my house with a crowbar, you’re probably deviant. - if you can’t manage to pay attention to social cues, like the women around you vomiting when you hock a loogie at their feet and then present it to them on a silver platter, you’re probably deviant or at least clueless. - if you still think a mullet is fashionable, you’re hopelessly deviant and should be put down (but not before I take a picture for my husband, who has a particular fascination with mullets). My daughter has forced me to deviance the past three nights in a row. She has a stuffy nose and keeps wandering into our room at 3 a.m., a sure sign of deviance. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/71 "2011-09-14T17:54:12Z")
> [@Nzinga\_Seated](#): > > I must have my humor-o-meter set to ultra sensitive because I read the OP in the spirit of just jokin’ around, tongue in cheek. That’s what I figured too. But, that said, the OP was an example of a really bad fallacy. And a fallacy that’s subtle enough that many people don’t even notice it. It’s the fallacy of projection. Thinking _“I find that person creepy”_ is a valid thought. But a lot of people turn it into _“That person is creepy”_ and that’s wrong. Your emotional response to someone or something is internal to you - it’s not something the person or object is projecting at you. You see it all the time. _“That person is offensive”_ instead of _“I am offended by that person”_. _“That person is annoying”_ rather than _“I am annoyed by that person”_. _“That person is frightening”_ rather than _“I am frightened by that person”_. We have an emotional response and we blame it on the other person. That enables us to see the problem as the other person not ourselves. Here’s an example. If I say _“Here’s the problem. I’m frightened when I see a group of teenagers walking in my direction after dark. What’s the solution?”_ Then people are going to offer suggestions like maybe I should get a dog or take a self-defense course so I’ll feel safer. Or maybe I should take an alternate route that’s well-lit and has other pedestrians. Or maybe I should do something so I meet more teenagers and that way they won’t frighten me. If I say _“Here’s the problem. Groups of teenagers walking around after dark are frightening. What’s the solution?”_ Now the suggestions will be try to get a curfew passed or an anti-loitering ordinance or maybe a law that says no group of more than three people under the age of twenty-one can congregate in public. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/72 "2011-09-14T17:57:35Z")
> [@overlyverbose](#): > > My daughter has forced me to deviance the past three nights in a row. She has a stuffy nose and keeps wandering into our room at 3 a.m., a sure sign of deviance. Maybe she has a deviant septum. ---
**Author:** ![SecretaryofEvil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@SecretaryofEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecretaryofEvil)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/73 "2011-09-14T18:13:31Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > That’s what I figured too. > > But, that said, the OP was an example of a really bad fallacy. And a fallacy that’s subtle enough that many people don’t even notice it. It’s the fallacy of projection. > > Thinking _“I find that person creepy”_ is a valid thought. But a lot of people turn it into _“That person is creepy”_ and that’s wrong. Your emotional response to someone or something is internal to you - it’s not something the person or object is projecting at you. > > You see it all the time. _“That person is offensive”_ instead of _“I am offended by that person”_. _“That person is annoying”_ rather than _“I am annoyed by that person”_. _“That person is frightening”_ rather than _“I am frightened by that person”_. We have an emotional response and we blame it on the other person. That enables us to see the problem as the other person not ourselves. > > Here’s an example. If I say _“Here’s the problem. I’m frightened when I see a group of teenagers walking in my direction after dark. What’s the solution?”_ Then people are going to offer suggestions like maybe I should get a dog or take a self-defense course so I’ll feel safer. Or maybe I should take an alternate route that’s well-lit and has other pedestrians. Or maybe I should do something so I meet more teenagers and that way they won’t frighten me. > > If I say _“Here’s the problem. Groups of teenagers walking around after dark are frightening. What’s the solution?”_ Now the suggestions will be try to get a curfew passed or an anti-loitering ordinance or maybe a law that says no group of more than three people under the age of twenty-one can congregate in public. You make a very good point. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Righteous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Dr.Righteous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Righteous)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/74 "2011-09-14T19:31:50Z")
One thing that immediately makes me think someone is up to no good: when they have those [tinted plastic covers](http://shopping.photomaskcover.com/products/smoked-tinted-photo-license-plate-cover) on their license plates. What are you doing/planning on doing that you want to make it hard for people to see your license plate, hmm? I’ve tried to think of a valid reason for having that and I can’t come up with one, especially here in the northeast U.S. So, is there some reason to have one of these that I just don’t know about, or should I keep on suspecting these people of nefarious behavior? ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/75 "2011-09-14T19:32:51Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > That’s what I figured too. > > But, that said, the OP was an example of a really bad fallacy. And a fallacy that’s subtle enough that many people don’t even notice it. It’s the fallacy of projection. > > Thinking _“I find that person creepy”_ is a valid thought. But a lot of people turn it into _“That person is creepy”_ and that’s wrong. Your emotional response to someone or something is internal to you - it’s not something the person or object is projecting at you. > > You see it all the time. _“That person is offensive”_ instead of _“I am offended by that person”_. _“That person is annoying”_ rather than _“I am annoyed by that person”_. _“That person is frightening”_ rather than _“I am frightened by that person”_. We have an emotional response and we blame it on the other person. That enables us to see the problem as the other person not ourselves. > > Here’s an example. If I say _“Here’s the problem. I’m frightened when I see a group of teenagers walking in my direction after dark. What’s the solution?”_ Then people are going to offer suggestions like maybe I should get a dog or take a self-defense course so I’ll feel safer. Or maybe I should take an alternate route that’s well-lit and has other pedestrians. Or maybe I should do something so I meet more teenagers and that way they won’t frighten me. > > If I say _“Here’s the problem. Groups of teenagers walking around after dark are frightening. What’s the solution?”_ Now the suggestions will be try to get a curfew passed or an anti-loitering ordinance or maybe a law that says no group of more than three people under the age of twenty-one can congregate in public. Analyzing things in a reasonable way is creepy, you prevert. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/76 "2011-09-14T19:38:44Z")
> [@Dr.Righteous](#): > > One thing that immediately makes me think someone is up to no good: when they have those [tinted plastic covers](http://shopping.photomaskcover.com/products/smoked-tinted-photo-license-plate-cover) on their license plates. What are you doing/planning on doing that you want to make it hard for people to see your license plate, hmm? > > I’ve tried to think of a valid reason for having that and I can’t come up with one, especially here in the northeast U.S. So, is there some reason to have one of these that I just don’t know about, or should I keep on suspecting these people of nefarious behavior? Nefarious. They’re marketed to defeat cameras on toll routes. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/77 "2011-09-14T19:44:32Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > > [@overlyverbose](#): > > > > My daughter has forced me to deviance the past three nights in a row. She has a stuffy nose and keeps wandering into our room at 3 a.m., a sure sign of deviance. > > Maybe she has a deviant septum. People who make me snort coffee out my nose are deviants. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/78 "2011-09-14T19:48:53Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > -People who wander the neighborhood who aren’t walking dogs or aren’t exercising. There’s no bus stops anywhere by, so it’s not likely they’re catching a bus. > > -People who won’t use facebook, texts, or emails or any other form of electronic communication. And people who don’t have CELL PHONES, but could afford them. Before I had my 9 to 5 job I must have been a real deve, because used to wander around town aimlessly as a way to get some fresh air and enjoy not being at work. Not as deviant as my mother, apparently, who is a big technophobe who won’t even use my coffee maker because it’s “too complicated.” ---
**Author:** ![Arrendajo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Arrendajo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrendajo)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/79 "2011-09-14T20:19:33Z")
My son had a stroke and has a lop-sided smile as a result. He is a sweet, good natured kid without a deviant bone in his body, much to his deviant father’s dismay. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/80 "2011-09-14T20:31:35Z")
Deviant behavior I can’t stand: Openly admitting to using drugs in casual conversation, or even lighting up around me when you barely know me. Texting me after months/years of never hearing from you with a “hey, sup?” Who the hell are you again? People who groan/moan/grunt/sigh/heave or otherwise vocalize while taking a dump in a public restroom. I don’t know HOW many times I have had to contain myself from busting out laughing after hearing some explosive shit accompanied by a loud “unngggg” and then a big “ahhhhhhh” afterwards. Sit there quietly and then leave quietly. EVEN WORSE IS IF YOU TRY TO HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH ME WHILE YOU ARE SHITTING. I also cannot stand when friends/family think it’s perfectly fine to take food off of my plate during dinner or whatever without asking. And no, don’t offer me some of yours, hoping I’m going to pipe up and offer you some of mine in return. If you want some, politely ask, and you will get some… but don’t be rude about it. Anyone who does any of these things is obviously up to no good. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203.md?page=5)