# Subtle signs that someone is deviant **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 13, 2011, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203 "2011-09-13T21:15:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![kushiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbce88/32.png) [@kushiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kushiel)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/81 "2011-09-14T20:33:29Z")
> [@jamiemcgarry](#): > > Wow. Hey now, I still hold down a real job and have friends! It’s the ones spending 40 hours a week playing that are deviants! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/82 "2011-09-14T20:36:33Z")
> [@Yarster](#): > > I can think of a few. > > 1. A younger male (18-30) who is twitchy and whose eyes move around too much. Sure, he could be in a hurry, and have to get home to his wife and sick child, but my brain instantly says “meth head”. > > 2. Any person whose physical appearance and/or clothing is unusual for a setting. In my world, that includes something as bland as the overly muscular guy with tattoos wih a serious look, who is advertising “Hey, I just got out of prison and I’m looking to start a fight”, or the guy who is wearing sunglasses and Raiders team paraphernalia at night. He’s advertising “I’m thinking about robbing this Taco Bell”. And yes, in my mind, Vin Diesel is going to start a fight AND rob the Taco Bell… > > 3. Anyone with a neck, face, or head tattoo in general. > > 4. People who drive cars with way too much money spent on the suspension, either to lower it (gang member) or raise it (gun toting red-neck). Good start. I would add to #3: visible piercings anywhere but the earlobe, and more than 2 in the earlobe itself. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/83 "2011-09-14T20:45:07Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > -People who have tinted car windows, no matter how conventional the car. > > … > -Just about anyone I see up and awake 3am on a week day, and it doesn’t appear to be work related. > > -This is a big one. Men who hit on me, when I look terrible. No make-up, hat on, sweats, etc. By any chance are you a stripper? Around people with tinted windows at 3am. Getting hit on by guys while wearing what I assume are the sweatpants and hat you change into when you leave your shift. The signs are all there! ---
**Author:** ![MyFootsZZZ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/myfootszzz/32/12580_2.png) [@MyFootsZZZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MyFootsZZZ)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/84 "2011-09-14T20:58:54Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > I agree with this. I HATE women who exude a natural radiance and beauty without the war paint. I kick them out of my bed. Or cuddle them, because they are just as sweet as the night before. > > There’s a lot of self-hate going on in the OP. This is what I think too. My ex girlfriend looks WAY cuter without makeup but she never understood why someone could believe such a thing! Her ex before me said the same thing. Maybe these are men that LIKE the fact that you’re not ‘made-up’. I definitely wouldn’t advice you to be any more skeptical of man who hits on you when you’re not wearing looking “your best”. Seriously ---
**Author:** ![Teufelblitz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@Teufelblitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teufelblitz)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/85 "2011-09-14T21:14:41Z")
I am a complete deviant. I think the world would be a better place if folks would stop worrying about make-up and fashionable clothing entirely. Wear what’s comfortable and relax, I say. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/86 "2011-09-14T22:05:44Z")
> [@Moonlitherial](#): > > Nefarious. They’re marketed to defeat cameras on toll routes. And cameras at photo speed limit and red light locations. ---
**Author:** ![heavyarms553](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/779978/32.png) [@heavyarms553](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heavyarms553)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2011, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/87 "2011-09-14T22:53:51Z")
Hah you would hate me. I’ve got bell’s palsy, I enjoy walking out in the park just to enjoy the nice weather, and I find women who use little make up more attractive than those who use it liberally. I’m a horrible, horrible person. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/88 "2011-09-15T00:00:39Z")
Unkempt women in hats stumbling around at 3 a.m., yelling “Get away from me!” at passersby and peering into tinted car windows give off one hell of a freaky vibe. It’s why I do all my Kroger shopping during daylight hours. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/89 "2011-09-15T00:27:53Z")
Well, I totally fit the OP’s description of a deviant . . . probably because I am one. (Ok, I’m not attracted to unkempt women . . . or, for that matter, kempt ones. Unkempt guys are fine.) ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/90 "2011-09-15T00:41:47Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > By any chance are you a stripper? Around people with tinted windows at 3am. Getting hit on by guys while wearing what I assume are the sweatpants and hat you change into when you leave your shift. The signs are all there! > [@Diamonds02](#): > > Futhermore, I’m a butch lesbian that looks like a 14 year old boy. It would have to be a fairly unusual strip club. I wonder how the OP feels about getting hit on by women when she’s dressed down? ---
**Author:** ![Diamonds02](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5a626/32.png) [@Diamonds02](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diamonds02)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/91 "2011-09-15T01:21:47Z")
I am in no way a man-hating lesbian. In fact, when it comes to friendship, I prefer men over women. And if I hated men so much, I wouldn’t dress like one. 😛 I just don’t like it when men are overly sexually aggressive and ignore social cues. It just seems weird that men hit on me when I dress so butch, especially when I dress down. It would bother me if a woman hit on me when I’m really dressed down. But not as much. I would feel self-conscious, but I wouldn’t feel creeped out or insulted. With guys though, I can’t help not to feel the vibe that they are looking for anyone with a vagina to hit on. And yes, my OP was supposed to be light-hearted. It’s all in the matter of perception. That was my point. A lot of the stuff mentioned can be totally normal things done by totally normal people, but if you think about it long enough you may come up with more sinister motives. It’s something fun to think about. Like astrology. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/92 "2011-09-15T01:25:26Z")
Not to get all controversial, but anyone else find it weird that a butch lesbian that looks like a 14-year-old boy is posting about deviancy? Not that I think butch lesbians who look like 14-year-olds are necessarily “deviant” (as in, being different in a bad way), but dayum. Seems like someone who fits this description would be the last one creating a thread like this! FWIW, I’m horrible at picking out “subtle” signs of things awry. You pretty much have to be speaking in tongues with snakes coming out of your eye sockets for me to register that you are creepy. Maybe it’s because I usually feel like the weirdo wherever I go, so I’m too busy expecting others to look at me askance to even notice what other people are doing? I don’t know. I’m curious if looking for these “subtle signs” is natural behavior that somehow slipped me by, or if it’s not really commonplace. ---
**Author:** ![Diamonds02](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b5a626/32.png) [@Diamonds02](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diamonds02)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/93 "2011-09-15T01:41:30Z")
I live in a big city. Hopefully, people are used to such things. Plus, that’s the only thing that’s deviant about my appearance (to my knowledge). No piercings, no tats, no dreads or blue hair. I either dress in business casual (button downs, blazers, etc.) or in nice jeans with a well-fitted solid color t-shirt. Very Gap, like an average late twentysomething or early thirtysomething guy. I’m not a “scary lesbian”. Are you saying that me dressing a little masculine alone makes me look deviant, despite I dress well? That’s cool if you or anyone else, believes so. That may explain why I feel that some people are slow to warm up to me. I do, of course, dress like a pick-pocket when I go to work though. I look like a hot mess. I do not want to look like a woman period then, not even a butch one. A safety issue. It’s just funny when I stop by a bar, casino, or even 7-11 on the way to work, I get hit on by guys. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/94 "2011-09-15T02:13:53Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > I live in a big city. Hopefully, people are used to such things. Plus, that’s the only thing that’s deviant about my appearance (to my knowledge). No piercings, no tats, no dreads or blue hair. I either dress in business casual (button downs, blazers, etc.) or in nice jeans with a well-fitted solid color t-shirt. Very Gap, like an average late twentysomething or early thirtysomething guy. I’m not a “scary lesbian”. Are you saying that me dressing a little masculine alone makes me look deviant, despite I dress well? That’s cool if you or anyone else, believes so. That may explain why I feel that some people are slow to warm up to me. I’m as androgynous as the next gal, so I don’t usually judge people as “deviant” based on their gender-appearance. On their clothing style, yeah. But if a guy is swishy or a woman is butchy, I don’t bat an eye. But as I said before, you’d have to have two heads for me to bat an eye. You’d have to be really clueless, though, to not know that people attribute negative qualities to women who choose not to dress in feminine ways. Or, to use the word you’ve introduced in this thread, these women are labeled as “deviant.” The namebrands don’t matter–you are deviant for departing from your gender role. That’s why I find this thread ironic. If you’d disclosed your own “deviancy” in the OP, that would be one thing. By not revealing this from the get-go, the OP comes across as weirdly judgmental, in a non-sarcastic way. Maybe if you had picked another word–like creepy or weird–my radar wouldn’t be pinging? But you chose “deviant”. It’s a word that carries a lot of luggage. Poor word choice, I think. > [@](#): > > I do, of course, dress like a pick-pocket when I go to work though. I look like a hot mess. I do not want to look like a woman period then, not even a butch one. A safety issue. It’s just funny when I stop by a bar, casino, or even 7-11 on the way to work, I get hit on by guys. If you think guys discriminate on who they hit on, you haven’t lived very long. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/95 "2011-09-15T09:24:26Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > -People who wander the neighborhood who aren’t walking dogs or aren’t exercising. There’s no bus stops anywhere by, so it’s not likely they’re catching a bus. Some of us just like… wait for it… walking. As an idle activity, not to be confused with jogging or anything else which may lead to sweating. Guess the immense majority of Europeans are deviants. Shouldn’t we be having more fun, then? :dubious: > [@monstro](#): > > If you think guys discriminate on who they hit on, you haven’t lived very long. 🙂 Hey, guys DO discriminate: they usually hit on people taller than the table and who are still breathing. ---
**Author:** ![HMS\_Irruncible](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hms_irruncible/32/7394_2.png) [@HMS\_Irruncible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HMS_Irruncible)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 10:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/96 "2011-09-15T10:09:09Z")
Smokers are deviant. Also, Ray Liotta always looks like he’s thinking about anal sex. ---
**Author:** ![Namkcalb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c89c15/32.png) [@Namkcalb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Namkcalb)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/97 "2011-09-15T13:06:39Z")
> [@Diamonds02](#): > > It would bother me if a woman hit on me when I’m really dressed down. But not as much. I would feel self-conscious, but I wouldn’t feel creeped out or insulted. With guys though, I can’t help not to feel the vibe that they are looking for anyone with a vagina to hit on. Dang! I think we’ve found the world’s first closet homophobe lesbian. You claim you look and dress quite masculinely. Maybe the last thing the guys who hit on you want is a vagina. It’s only a tired stereotype that all confirmed bachelors are obsessed with clothes. ---
**Author:** ![Justin\_Bailey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/justin_bailey/32/8792_2.png) [@Justin\_Bailey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Justin_Bailey)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/98 "2011-09-15T13:43:06Z")
> [@Yarster](#): > > 1. Any person whose physical appearance and/or clothing is unusual for a setting. In my world, that includes something as bland as the overly muscular guy with tattoos wih a serious look, who is advertising “Hey, I just got out of prison and I’m looking to start a fight”, or the guy who is wearing sunglasses and Raiders team paraphernalia at night. He’s advertising “I’m thinking about robbing this Taco Bell”. And yes, in my mind, Vin Diesel is going to start a fight AND rob the Taco Bell… But Vin Diesel doesn’t have any tattoos. He just looks like someone who would. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/99 "2011-09-15T15:20:59Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > It would have to be a fairly unusual strip club. I don’t judge. ---
**Author:** ![Hermitian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hermitian/32/470_2.png) [@Hermitian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hermitian)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2011, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203/100 "2011-09-15T20:13:57Z")
Guys with really curly hair. Ya’ know, like the short tight curls. Totally can not be trusted. No way. Nope, I have no basis, but I don’t care. Can’t be trusted. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/subtle-signs-that-someone-is-deviant/596203.md?page=6)