# Super Heroes vs. Starship Enterprise **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 9, 2011, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244 "2011-05-09T06:44:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Estilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Estilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Estilicon)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/22 "2011-05-10T13:45:35Z")
> [@ExTank](#): > > The _real_ question is how they’d all stack up against a Star Destroyer! 😃 > > d/r That is actually a pretty good question. It would make a great thread. Anybody interested? (I don’t want to hijack this one). ---
**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/23 "2011-05-10T14:01:42Z")
> [@Tengu](#): > > …Blue Lanterns and Star Sapphires would outfly them, but not be great in combat. > [@Dan\_Norder](#): > > … Mister Fantastic would take a shuttlecraft, a calculator and a whiffle bat and find a way to convert them into some technological marvel that would shut the Enterprise’s power down cold. Let us not forget that the Star Trek characters are just as over-the-top in their capabilities as their superheroic counterparts. Star Sapphires in their stripperiffic outfits would be no match for the James T Kirk. I mean, seriously. And Scotty (or other Star Trek engineers) come up with just as many improbably technobabbled marvels as Mr. Fantastic. Polarities would be reversing right, left, and center. And I shudder to think of the carnage that could ensue from a quip-off between Spider-Man, McCoy, and Spock. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/24 "2011-05-10T15:41:38Z")
> [@Clark\_K](#): > > Why Alan Scott and not the rest? I judge it conceivable that Data & Geordi could suss out that Hal’s ring is vulnerable to yellow, and I expect Kyle or Guy might do something foolish in the battle. But the only way the Enterprise has a prayer against a pissed-off Alan Scott is if the battle starts 23 hours & 50 minutes after his last ring charge and he doesn’t have his battery at hand. ---
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/25 "2011-05-10T15:42:52Z")
> [@Estilicon](#): > > That is actually a pretty good question. It would make a great thread. Anybody interested? (I don’t want to hijack this one). Use this thread if you like. ---
**Author:** ![Estilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Estilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Estilicon)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/26 "2011-05-10T15:55:03Z")
> [@Bearflag70](#): > > Use this thread if you like. Whoosh 🙂 (there are actually a couple of very long threads devoted to this subject). Besides, everybody knows the answer: Kirk is Vader’s bitch. ---
**Author:** ![Bearflag70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Bearflag70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bearflag70)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/27 "2011-05-10T16:01:54Z")
> [@Estilicon](#): > > Whoosh 🙂 (there are actually a couple of very long threads devoted to this subject). > > Besides, everybody knows the answer: Kirk is Vader’s bitch. Ah. I interpreted the post as wondering how all the super heroes would stack up against a Star Destroyer. ---
**Author:** ![Estilicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Estilicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Estilicon)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/28 "2011-05-10T16:05:39Z")
Then the joke is on me 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/29 "2011-05-10T16:12:58Z")
The Enterprises (all but the NX) have shields, and a Star Trek shield might be a fair approximation for Promethium or Adamantium. Many super groupings might have no way to enter the ship. Telepaths could mind control a way in, Shadowcat could probably pass through and disrupt the Enterprise’s mainframe. Thor or Storm in a space suit might be able to call up something similar to the Mutara Nebula and render shields and sensors useless. If inside the ship, any super team is going to be at a huge advantage unless the ship captain decides to do some un-Star Trekky stuff. Like flood the halls with poison, use high frequency sound to knock out the team or overstress the artificial gravity. So, I’d say it depends on the team make up, and the writer. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/30 "2011-05-10T16:24:15Z")
> [@](#): > > The X-Men, without their cosmic members (who tend to be unreliable) haven’t a prayer against the Enterprise in space, but it’d never come to such a battle; they’re just not set up for it. Most of them, I’d agree (most of the more powerful X-Men have powers that wouldn’t work in space), but couldn’t Professor X take them all out single-mindedly? Assuming, of course, that his ethics allow it. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/31 "2011-05-10T16:42:55Z")
Didn’t Kirk beat God? I wouldn’t give a plugged nickel for the Avenger or the JLA against a ripped-shirt Kirk. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/32 "2011-05-10T16:43:09Z")
Wouldn’t Prof. X hesitate for a fatal moment when he laid eyes on Capt. Picard? [http://www.freewebs.com/xfreak0310/home%20page.jpg](http://www.freewebs.com/xfreak0310/home%20page.jpg) [http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/6/6d/JeanLucPicard.jpg/250px-JeanLucPicard.jpg](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/6/6d/JeanLucPicard.jpg/250px-JeanLucPicard.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/half_man_half_wit/32/21766_2.png) [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Half_Man_Half_Wit)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/33 "2011-05-10T16:45:32Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > Thor or Storm in a space suit might be able to call up something similar to the Mutara Nebula and render shields and sensors useless. That’s an interesting question (for, uh, certain values of interesting) – does weather control extend to space weather? > [@Chronos](#): > > Most of them, I’d agree (most of the more powerful X-Men have powers that wouldn’t work in space), but couldn’t Professor X take them all out single-mindedly? Assuming, of course, that his ethics allow it. So, you mean, if it’s convenient? Oh, and… Patrick Stewart doesn’t age. What’s up with that? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/34 "2011-05-10T16:56:09Z")
> [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](#): > > That’s an interesting question (for, uh, certain values of interesting) – does weather control extend to space weather? I think Storm’s power is better described as control of ambient energy fields. It’s been suggested in canon that she can manipulate radiation in space; she simply doesn’t bother when she’s on a planet because she’s very skilled at screwing with the weather. That said, the Enterprise owns her until they make the mistake of beaming her aboard. ---
**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/35 "2011-05-10T17:04:07Z")
Way, _waaay_ back in the Claremont days, before Storm had a mohawk even, the X-Men went into space against the [del]Xenomorphs[/del] Brood. Storm ended up befriending some space-whales, and we discovered that her weather powers _did_, in fact, work in space. Solar wind. … What? I already _said_ “Claremont” and “space-whales”, and you were expecting what was to follow would make sense? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/36 "2011-05-10T17:10:56Z")
> [@Lightray](#): > > Way, _waaay_ back in the Claremont days, before Storm had a mohawk even, the X-Men went into space against the [del]Xenomorphs[/del] Brood. Storm ended up befriending some space-whales, and we discovered that her weather powers _did_, in fact, work in space. > > Solar wind. > > … What? I already _said_ “Claremont” and “space-whales”, and you were expecting what was to follow would make sense? That’s exactly the incident I was thinking of; the space whales were called the Acanti. (God, that story rocked; it’s much better than it sounds.) As I recall it, Storm’s specific thought process during the battle was that she was forced to rely **only** on her lightning, whereas she would have preferred to toss around radiation bolts too; but she was recuperating from massive injuries and didn’t have the juice. Her phrasing was confident enough that it was clear she knew she could do it and how to do it. I can easily she her and Xavier working on it in the Danger Room. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/37 "2011-05-11T00:26:29Z")
Four way fight, Enterprise D vs Vader’s Star Destroyer vs a fully stocked and repaired Battlestar Galactica vs Batman, who wins? Batman is only 50% prepared, btw. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/38 "2011-05-11T03:29:31Z")
Multi-way fights always come down to politics, who’s willing to temporarily ally with whom and who’s willing to stab whom in the back. If the combatants all know each others’ backstories, then the other three will all gang up on the Star Destroyer, Vader being, as tagonists go, an rather than pro. From there, Batman will probably come up with some ruse to convince Picard and Adama that the other is not to be trusted, and sit on the sidelines while they duke it out, intervening only when one of them starts to get the upper hand. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/39 "2011-05-12T00:59:13Z")
😃 ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/40 "2011-05-12T07:04:58Z")
> [@Lobohan](#): > > The Enterprises (all but the NX) have shields, and a Star Trek shield might be a fair approximation for Promethium or Adamantium. In my viewing, an ST shield is a fair approximation of a rusty colander. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244/41 "2011-05-12T07:07:17Z")
> [@TBG](#): > > Four way fight, Enterprise D vs Vader’s Star Destroyer vs a fully stocked and repaired Battlestar Galactica vs Batman, who wins? > > Batman is only 50% prepared, btw. Vader. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-heroes-vs-starship-enterprise/581244.md?page=3)