# Super Rare Picture Of Mariah's Cousin In Action After Initiation! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 8, 2008, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649 "2008-07-08T03:46:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/21 "2008-07-08T15:14:19Z")
Everyone! Calm down! There is no squid. The goats are just a rumour. We welcome newbies with delicious home-made ice cream and other treats. There’s nothing to worry about. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/22 "2008-07-08T15:36:53Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] Everyone! Calm down! There is no squid. The goats are just a rumour. We welcome newbies with delicious home-made ice cream and other treats. There’s nothing to worry about. [/QUOTE] Correct…all the stories you may have herd…errr..heard are untrue. ---
**Author:** ![singular1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ba9def/32.png) [@singular1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/singular1)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/23 "2008-07-08T15:39:45Z")
**Charter** Member here, I’ll have you know, & I don’t know what the fuck is going on, either… ---
**Author:** ![Mindfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindfield/32/19759_2.png) [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/24 "2008-07-08T15:47:10Z")
> [@singular1](#): > > Charter Member here, I’ll have you know, & I don’t know what the fuck is going on, either… > [@Attack From the 3rd Dimension](#): > > Lurked forever. Signed up. Never did a “hi, I’m new here [dimple]” post, just started posting. Now I must confess these sins, and ask: > > What the hell is going on? > [@Cisco](#): > > Does this have something to do with HP Lovecraft? We’re gonna need a bigger goat. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/25 "2008-07-08T15:48:51Z")
Damn, I’ve been here since 2000 and y’all might as well be speaking Greek for all the sense this makes to me. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/26 "2008-07-08T16:06:59Z")
Just an in-joke, folks, nothing to see here. Although this in-joke is rare in that it gets creepier the more enthusiastically people participate. Now, the _Mod_ initiation ceremony - that’s an eldritch horror for you. ---
**Author:** ![Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/half_man_half_wit/32/21766_2.png) [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Half_Man_Half_Wit)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/27 "2008-07-08T16:15:18Z")
I wasn’t sure what to expect when I entered this thread. . . . The condition proves to be remarkably persistent. ---
**Author:** ![Mindfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mindfield/32/19759_2.png) [@Mindfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mindfield)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/28 "2008-07-08T16:19:29Z")
[QUOTE=Half Man Half Wit] I wasn’t sure what to expect when I entered this thread. . . . The condition proves to be remarkably persistent. [/QUOTE] Wait’ll we show you The Great Lonk. _Nobody_ expects The Great Lonk. ---
**Author:** ![freekalette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/50afbb/32.png) [@freekalette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freekalette)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/29 "2008-07-08T18:22:00Z")
I hereby put forth a motion for the Board’s approval. As we are all aware, there exist two great Truths here at the Straight Dope. Truth one is that all new members must undergo initiation rights as laid forth in the Old Days. Truth two is that our own dear **Autolycus** has a certain hbistory with a kitchen utensil. And so it is that I come before you today, in the hopes of taking two seemingly different truths, and combining them into one glorious Truth. Some have expressed concerns that our initiation methods are outdated and obsolete. While I disagree wholeheartedly, I nevertheless propose the addition of a new method, not to replace but to enhance the current proceedings. And so I give you [this](http://www.occasionalhell.com/infdevice/detail.php?recordID=Lead%20Sprinkler) beautiful object, and humbly suggest the following: 1. That we elevate **Autolycus** ’s postion and create for him a new important-sounding title to reflect the solemnity of this position. 2. That we find a far more suitable and Dopeworthy substance with which to fill this fascinating new implement. 3. Opal is out today, I believe, so no point in saying Hi. 4. That after a vote to determine items number 1 and 2, we all have pie to celebrate, before returning to the initiation previously in progress. All in favor? ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/30 "2008-07-08T19:21:43Z")
[QUOTE=freekalette] I hereby put forth a motion for the Board’s approval. As we are all aware, there exist two great Truths here at the Straight Dope. Truth one is that all new members must undergo initiation rights as laid forth in the Old Days. Truth two is that our own dear **Autolycus** has a certain hbistory with a kitchen utensil. And so it is that I come before you today, in the hopes of taking two seemingly different truths, and combining them into one glorious Truth. Some have expressed concerns that our initiation methods are outdated and obsolete. While I disagree wholeheartedly, I nevertheless propose the addition of a new method, not to replace but to enhance the current proceedings. And so I give you [this](http://www.occasionalhell.com/infdevice/detail.php?recordID=Lead%20Sprinkler) beautiful object, and humbly suggest the following: 1. That we elevate **Autolycus** ’s postion and create for him a new important-sounding title to reflect the solemnity of this position. 2. That we find a far more suitable and Dopeworthy substance with which to fill this fascinating new implement. 3. Opal is out today, I believe, so no point in saying Hi. 4. That after a vote to determine items number 1 and 2, we all have pie to celebrate, before returning to the initiation previously in progress. All in favor? [/QUOTE] Nay. We have to keep \*\*Hal \*\* in business, and he works on the new versions of the Robo-Goat. Mariah likes the activity. The gorilla is working up a good coat of fur right now. These are good initiation practices. I defy you to come up with something better. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/31 "2008-07-08T19:24:30Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] Nay. We have to keep \*\*Hal \*\* in business, and he works on the new versions of the Robo-Goat. Mariah likes the activity. The gorilla is working up a good coat of fur right now. These are good initiation practices. I defy you to come up with something better. [/QUOTE] I would tend to agree with **LOUNE**. However I am in favor of the pie having. We should do that part anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/32 "2008-07-08T19:27:49Z")
[QUOTE=Antinor01] I would tend to agree with **LOUNE**. However I am in favor of the pie having. We should do that part anyway. [/QUOTE] Well, that goes without being said. That’s why we instituted the “Pie Rule” in the first place. You leave, you come back…but _with pie_. I think it’s safe to assume that there’s enough pie to be had for all. Them’s the penalties for leaving ---
**Author:** ![freekalette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/50afbb/32.png) [@freekalette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freekalette)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/33 "2008-07-08T19:35:52Z")
Wait, wait! Reread my proposition. I’m suggesting we keep the Old Ways! I just thought that with so much new blood coming in, perhaps we should expand our initiation to include new rites in addition to the RoboGoat, Mariah, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/34 "2008-07-08T19:39:30Z")
[QUOTE=freekalette] Wait, wait! Reread my proposition. I’m suggesting we keep the Old Ways! I just thought that with so much new blood coming in, perhaps we should expand our initiation to include new rites in addition to the RoboGoat, Mariah, etc. [/QUOTE] I’ll leave it to you to explain to Mariah and her cousin why you want to change things. Policy dictates that you tell them yourself since it’s your proposal. Are you sure you want to risk that? ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/35 "2008-07-08T20:29:54Z")
When someone figures what the hell this is all about, could you drop my name please? Then I can revisit when I do a vanity search. ---
**Author:** ![Sunrazor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sunrazor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunrazor)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/36 "2008-07-08T20:42:07Z")
OK, I’ve been paying the annual fee for three years now and 1. I’ve never gotten a single piece of goddamn pie (although I did get a nice piece of candy in a valentine once). 2. I wouldn’t know Opal if she walked in the room and sat down to talk. 3. I have never, ever partaken of any drug so strong that it gave me a hallucination/vision such as the one illustrated in the photo link. 4. I have only a vague idea of what Autolycus did with the spatula, and to whom. 5. I don’t even want to know about the goats! I can only assume that those in the know are virtually winking and giggling at each other, covering their little mouths with their chubby little hands while gasps of mirth escape in wet sputters. But some day, some day, all of your secrets will be published and, like the Freemasons, you will be reviled as evil conspirators in a plot to sell humankind’s soul to Satan himself. Just wait, you’ll see. You’ll see! ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/37 "2008-07-08T20:52:39Z")
I’d only heard about **Autolycus’** romantic relationship with a ladle. There’s a spatula involved, too? A threesome? That would be like \*\*Hal seeing other livestock. Oh, the humanity! StG ---
**Author:** ![Viridiana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/ebca7d/32.png) [@Viridiana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Viridiana)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/38 "2008-07-08T21:00:46Z")
You guys are meen. ---
**Author:** ![Sunrazor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sunrazor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunrazor)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/39 "2008-07-08T21:09:00Z")
[QUOTE=StGermain] I’d only heard about **Autolycus’** romantic relationship with a ladle. There’s a spatula involved, too? A threesome? That would be like \*\*Hal seeing other livestock. Oh, the humanity! StG [/QUOTE] My bad! Ladle it is, ladle it was and ladle it ever shall be. He remains true to his ladle. From what I hear. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2008, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649/40 "2008-07-08T21:14:15Z")
[QUOTE=Sunrazor] …you will be reviled as evil conspirators in a plot to sell humankind’s soul to Satan himself. [/QUOTE] Hey, wait a minute! How do you know that we’re not conspiring to sell humankind’s soul to God? Why should Satan get all the mercenary action? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/super-rare-picture-of-mariahs-cousin-in-action-after-initiation/455649.md?page=3)