Superheroes and Supervillains

A friend of mine came up with that in a superhero game: using water to produce force fields, battering rams, etc. A “Water Lantern” effect, if you will.

His superhero name was Tsunami, but we always called him Water Weenie.

I think, mostly, because it’s a crappy website.

There was a pathetic Marvel villain with that power, called Water Wizard; you maybe think him being pathetic is my opinion and should!'t be stated as a fact, but hear me out: after a gunman shot up a bar full of crooks, Water Wizard – who survived solely because his car had a flat tire and so he got there after – sought out Captain America for help, and promptly attacked Cap with water, and promptly lost, and promptly explained, hey, I had to be sure you were the real Cap, right?

So by his own reckoning, he knows going in that he’ll lose to Cap. And, by his own reckoning, he knows he would’ve been killed by the mundane gunman, too. And by his own further reckoning, I give you the following quote from when he was asked to battle Iron Man: “Are you CRAZY? I almost got skragged in 'Nam, and then I only had an ARMY to fight! The only thing my water-forming powers are going to make is a surf-scooter to GET ME THE BLAZE OUT OF HERE!”

Again, and I can’t stress this enough, getting a flat tire was the high point, there.

He’s basically a Water Bender, and he can’t figure out how to use it in a fight?

Kitara would kick his ass for being such a loser.

For what it’s worth, he pretty much got his start as a recurring Ghost Rider villain.

So, y’know, he can form a water-creature on the rampage – except he’s up against someone who excels at blasting stuff apart with hellfire. Maybe he’d have gotten off to a decent start as a Daredevil villain or a Hawkeye villain or whatever, but he soon built up a whole lot of inertia against the wrong guy.

Some of you will remember the Tenchi Muyo episode where Ryoko (wearing very little, in fact bum-all nothing) summons a water elemental…but forgot the first law of Lovecraftian Summoning:

“Do not call up that which you cannot put down.” (The Case of Charles Dexter Ward.)

Still, nakie ladies summoning demons: kewl!

It gets better. He can control any kind of liquid. Yeah, no way that could be useful.

Miller, could you suggest a better website?