# Superheroes' useless tics **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 12, 2011, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117 "2011-04-12T17:22:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/21 "2011-04-13T16:25:43Z")
Spandex. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/22 "2011-04-13T18:24:49Z")
> [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](#): > > Myabe the idea was it would melt them being so close. But no real idea. It was definitely that. Silver-Age Superman had magic lenses (well, Kryptonian lenses, but what’s the diff?) that could bear the heat, but normal glass would melt. It happened to him once when a villain switched glasses on him because he, the villain, wanted the lenses for another purpose. Interestingly, the lenses came from his rocket ship’s window, which had shattered just before becoming indestructible under Earth’s yellow sun. Two of the pieces happened to be almost exactly circular and fit in a pair of his father’s cast-off frames. How glass managed to metabolize solar radiation was not explaine.d I have this horrible suspicion that the spaceship was alive and immortal and screaming all the while, only without a mouth. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/23 "2011-04-13T18:52:54Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > … I have this horrible suspicion that the spaceship was alive and immortal and screaming all the while, only without a mouth. 😃 I have no mouth, and I must scream. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/24 "2011-04-13T18:56:21Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > I have no mouth, and I must scream. Allusions are best when not overt. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/25 "2011-04-13T19:01:12Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Allusions are best when not overt. That’s easy for college-boys, but what about us morons? ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/26 "2011-04-13T19:04:18Z")
> [@](#): > > I have no mouth, and I must scream. I always though this would make a good subtitle for **Dilbert** ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/27 "2011-04-13T19:04:49Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > That’s easy for college-boys, but what about us morons? You are not a moron. I checked the records to be sure. There are several very insulting remarks about you in those records, true, but nothing denigrating your intelligence. In other business I really think you should continue to stay away from Argentina for a little while longer. Not all the witnesses are dead yet, and none of the detectives are. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/28 "2011-04-13T19:13:20Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > …Not all the witnesses are dead yet, … yet. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2011, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/29 "2011-04-13T19:15:24Z")
> [@BMalion](#): > > yet. I SAID that. Anyway, let me handle it. Your face is still up on the thing in the joint beside the place. ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/30 "2011-04-14T01:36:40Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I SAID that. Anyway, let me handle it. Your face is still up on the thing in the joint beside the place. With the stuff? I know that place. Good place. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/31 "2011-04-14T01:44:29Z")
> [@Autolycus](#): > > With the stuff? I know that place. Good place. It was my pleasure. I’d never been to Belize. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/32 "2011-04-14T01:47:28Z")
Are Jocasta’s tits more useless than Rogue’s? At least you can touch them. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/33 "2011-04-14T03:19:21Z")
You can touch Rogue’s, too. Mind you, I’m not saying it’d be a good idea. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/34 "2011-04-14T07:03:15Z")
I don’t know what would be worse, ending up with your conscience sharing headspace with the people she already has there or having Mistique come after you because you groped her daughter… ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/35 "2011-04-14T15:12:23Z")
> [@Biggirl](#): > > Are Jocasta’s tits more useless than Rogue’s? At least you can touch them. I’m fairly sure that Jocasta’s tits are an exact match (in shape only, of course) for Janet Van Dyne’s. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/36 "2011-04-14T18:06:49Z")
> [@Biggirl](#): > > Are Jocasta’s tits more useless than Rogue’s? At least you can touch them. But what would be the point? They’re metal. You might as well feel up a couple of stainless steel mixing bowls. So realistically, you have to figure both Jocasta’s and Rogue’s breasts are going to be best enjoyed visually. And here, Rogue has the clear advantage. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/37 "2011-04-14T18:23:40Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > But what would be the point? They’re metal. You might as well feel up a couple of stainless steel mixing bowls. > > So realistically, you have to figure both Jocasta’s and Rogue’s breasts are going to be best enjoyed visually. And here, Rogue has the clear advantage. Fool of a mutant! The vast majority of comic book superheroes are drawn as nudes, with only colors and the lack of visible nipples & genitalia to indication clothing. In short, there’s not a whole lot of difference between the way Rogue is drawn and the way Jocasta is. In other matters: When y’all read the name of the latter character, do you perceive it as beginning with a _y_ sound or a soft _g_? ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/38 "2011-04-14T19:56:49Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Allusions are best when not overt. [QUOTE= BMalion] That’s easy for college-boys, but what about us morons? [/QUOTE] For those who missed, _I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream_ is the name of a short story (and subsequent collection) by Harlan Ellison. That’s easy for college-boys, but what about us morons? [QUOTE=Skald the Rhymer] In other matters: When y’all read the name of the latter character, do you perceive it as beginning with a _y_ sound or a soft _g_? [/QUOTE] You mean a “j” sound? Yes. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/39 "2011-04-14T20:10:00Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > You can touch Rogue’s, too. > > Mind you, I’m not saying it’d be a good idea. Eh, she just needs a guy who’s really into latex. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 14, 2011, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117/40 "2011-04-14T20:25:47Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Fool of a mutant! > > The vast majority of comic book superheroes are drawn as nudes, with only colors and the lack of visible nipples & genitalia to indication clothing. In short, there’s not a whole lot of difference between the way Rogue is drawn and the way Jocasta is. > > In other matters: When y’all read the name of the latter character, do you perceive it as beginning with a _y_ sound or a soft _g_? Fool of a person who was splashed by a mysterious blend of chemicals during a lab explosion! Who would you rather see in a wet t-shit contest? Jocasta or Rogue? And it’s pronounced with a j sound. Because otherwise, every time one of the other Avengers yelled out “Yo, casta!” Laetitia Casta would think they were calling her. And let’s face it, she’s may be scrappy for a model but she’s not qualified to fight Galactus. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superheroes-useless-tics/578117.md?page=3)