# Superpowered babies **URL:** \ **Category:** Cecil's Columns/Staff Reports\ **Created:** [May 22, 2015, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593 "2015-05-22T15:16:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![glowacks](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/glowacks/32/5548_2.png) [@glowacks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glowacks)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/1 "2015-05-22T15:16:49Z")
Not a comment on the content of the article per se, but things like > [@Cecil](#): > > At six months, English-learning babies were found to be apparently better than adults at distinguishing between the vocalizations of different rhesus monkeys (as evidenced by C-Span ratings, this skill is lost in adulthood). are the reason I continue to read the Dope. E-, er Cecil’s high-brow humor is difficult to find elsewhere. > **[Do babies have super powers?](https://www.straightdope.com/21344321/do-babies-have-super-powers)** ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2015, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/2 "2015-05-22T23:52:32Z")
There was some loon on “Coast to Coast” demonstrating that babies functioned backwards in time. He recorded infants’ prattle and played it backward, and, lo! it formed intelligible words! Taking messages backward in time would be a very practical superpower; if only we could harness this massive causality violation for worthwhile purposes. (Say, what horse was it that won the Preakness?) ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [May 23, 2015, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/3 "2015-05-23T05:56:27Z")
Shit. Got to teach my kid French/teach her Esperanto (and learn it myself). > [@Trinopus](#): > > There was some loon on “Coast to Coast” demonstrating that babies functioned backwards in time. He recorded infants’ prattle and played it backward, and, lo! it formed intelligible words! Goo goo g’joob does sound like baby talk. Paul is dead! Contrasting “critical periods” with adaptability of brains is not really a contrast though. The common denominator is that we are able to learn more and can adapt better to damage/limitations _when we are young_. ---
**Author:** ![BCDeb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@BCDeb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BCDeb)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/4 "2015-05-24T04:27:34Z")
> [@glowacks](#): > > Not a comment on the content of the article per se, but things like > > are the reason I continue to read the Dope. E-, er Cecil’s high-brow humor is difficult to find elsewhere. > > [Do babies have super powers? - The Straight Dope](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/3229/do-babies-have-super-powers) I was interested in the bit about the monkeys for a different reason. I wondered, if we could keep a baby with a rhesus monkey speaking rhesus monkey and his parents speaking whatever language they speak together for long enough, would a child grow up able to translate rhesus monkey into his parents’ language? I would be very interested in being able to understand what rhesus monkeys are saying. Heck, I’d be very interested in being able to understand what my pet cat or dog is saying. There is such a barrier. ---
**Author:** ![Stef\_Coulombe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Stef\_Coulombe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stef_Coulombe)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2015, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/5 "2015-05-24T07:04:54Z")
Sorry to go off text, but normally the cute (and sometimes rather explicit) cartoons accompanying Cecil’s columns are fairly self-explanatory. However… I can’t quite figure out what the two appendages sticking out of the mother’s front (below her arms) are supposed to be. Any ideas? (I’d hate to think the cartoonist assumed prehensile mammaries would be a meaningful addition to the image…) [http://www.straightdope.com/images/art/2015/dope\_150522\_babypowers\_online.gif](http://www.straightdope.com/images/art/2015/dope_150522_babypowers_online.gif) ---
**Author:** ![Powers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Powers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Powers)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/6 "2015-05-25T23:33:26Z")
> [@Stef\_Coulombe](#): > > Sorry to go off text, but normally the cute (and sometimes rather explicit) cartoons accompanying Cecil’s columns are fairly self-explanatory. However… I can’t quite figure out what the two appendages sticking out of the mother’s front (below her arms) are supposed to be. Any ideas? (I’d hate to think the cartoonist assumed prehensile mammaries would be a meaningful addition to the image…) > > [http://www.straightdope.com/images/art/2015/dope\_150522\_babypowers\_online.gif](http://www.straightdope.com/images/art/2015/dope_150522_babypowers_online.gif) They’re clearly breasts, though I don’t know why you’d think they were prehensile. I will admit that Slug’s boobs (the ones he draws, not the ones he wears) have gotten more and more tubular over the years. Powers &8^] ---
**Author:** ![Powers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Powers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Powers)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2015, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/7 "2015-05-25T23:38:49Z")
> [@BCDeb](#): > > I was interested in the bit about the monkeys for a different reason. I wondered, if we could keep a baby with a rhesus monkey speaking rhesus monkey and his parents speaking whatever language they speak together for long enough, would a child grow up able to translate rhesus monkey into his parents’ language? I would be very interested in being able to understand what rhesus monkeys are saying. > > Heck, I’d be very interested in being able to understand what my pet cat or dog is saying. There is such a barrier. I don’t know if you’re being facetious or not, but rhesus monkeys don’t have language. Certainly a child brought up integrated into rhesus monkey society would pick up a lot of their vocal and non-vocal communications, but it’s unlikely any of it is abstract enough to require translation into human language. Powers &8^] ---
**Author:** ![Stef\_Coulombe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Stef\_Coulombe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stef_Coulombe)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2015, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/8 "2015-05-26T02:04:23Z")
> [@Powers](#): > > They’re clearly breasts, though I don’t know why you’d think they were prehensile. > > I will admit that Slug’s boobs (the ones he draws, not the ones he wears) have gotten more and more tubular over the years. > Powers &8^] “Prehensile” because they seem to reaching out to grab the baby. Or, given that the mother seems to be threatening the child with a fly swatter, perhaps the breasts are planning some other disciplinary action. However, “tubular” (though not a word I would usually associate with the feminine charms) does also seem quite appropriate. ;p ---
**Author:** ![BCDeb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@BCDeb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BCDeb)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2015, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/9 "2015-05-27T05:13:14Z")
> [@Powers](#): > > I don’t know if you’re being facetious or not, but rhesus monkeys don’t have language. > > Certainly a child brought up integrated into rhesus monkey society would pick up a lot of their vocal and non-vocal communications, but it’s unlikely any of it is abstract enough to require translation into human language. > Powers &8^] I was not being facetious. Perhaps “translation” was a poor choice of words. The vocalization have to mean something, however simple the communication may be. Maybe certain vocalizations warn of danger for example. Maybe other vocalizations are expressions of love (so to speak) for offspring. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2015, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/10 "2015-05-27T15:50:49Z")
This is Slug we’re talking about. He probably always thinks prehensile mammaries are an enhancement to any image. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2015, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/superpowered-babies/720593/11 "2015-05-27T16:07:40Z")
> [@BCDeb](#): > > Heck, I’d be very interested in being able to understand what my pet cat or dog is saying. There is such a barrier. Lots of children grow up around cats or dogs. They don’t usually acquire any magical pet-whispering abilities, as far as I know.