# Support for my Husband \[RIP, condolences-ed. ITD\] **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 15, 2015, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682 "2015-10-15T01:49:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/1 "2015-10-15T01:49:07Z")
[Prior approval granted by the moderators.] As many Dopers know, my husband has been sick for some time. Five years ago, he was diagnosed with non-alcoholic cirrhosis (NASH) and you all have heard me struggle endlessly with his subsequent non-compliance. It’s been a ridiculously hard road when coupled with my mental health issues. Then in June, this oncologist discover he had Stage 3 Myeloma. The prognosis was two years if left untreated and up to seven if he responded to the right chemo combination treatment. Well, in the interim, he’s been in the hospital close to ten times, mostly due to not doing as he needed. But since about the middle of August, the decline has been very, very rapid. Often he can’t raise himself up, walk more than a couple of steps (with aid), nor breath unhampered. At the beginning of this week, after fearing I can no longer lift him when he falls, I decide to check on a nursing home placement. And that’s when our world went pear-shaped. Seems the chemo is destroying everything else. His kidneys are starting to fail and it’s causing an enlarged heart. He has tumors spread across his chest and, the new prognosis is that he’ll do good (!) to see the next six months. So, guys, here’s what I’m asking of you for my 51 year old sweetie… My fellow has never been good at making friends. Once he went off work from all these medical complications, he sunk into a deep depression and has done nothing but isolate. As such, I’m sure he feels terribly alone in this. He only has one son, who lives three hours away and has a family to tend to, and no one else living except a cousin. I’d like for folks to send him cards (or letters / notes). Little words of encouragement and support, to let him know that somewhere out there, someone is thinking of him and rooting for him. It can say anything; a prayer, a joke, a printed out picture, a drawing, whatever. I’ll just be grateful for anything so that each day, he’ll have something to cling to. But that’s not all. I’d also like you to pass this on, if you don’t mind. A friend has posted this to her Facebook and I’ve put it on my Instagram, but I’m sure there’s many more people we could reach. Locally, it’s going around to all my loved one’s church’s, and for myself, the place where I volunteer. Then it’s being shared again with their friends and so on and so on. Hell, I’d be thrilled if I have to rent a PO box to handle all the mail. Just every last bit will be a blessing. I hope to you all as well. So, that’s it. His name is Jaceson. I can either email or PM my address. Simply let me know. Beyond that, thank you and God bless. Kemi~ ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/2 "2015-10-15T01:53:51Z")
PM me the address. I’ll be glad to do what I can. Best wishes. ---
**Author:** ![Cabin\_Fever\_1](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cabin_fever_1/32/2908_2.png) [@Cabin\_Fever\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cabin_Fever_1)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/3 "2015-10-15T01:54:23Z")
Just to let you know…my thoughts and prayers being sent your way. PEACE. ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/4 "2015-10-15T01:56:54Z")
I sent you a pm. ---
**Author:** ![Pai325](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/5 "2015-10-15T01:59:19Z")
PM sent. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/6 "2015-10-15T02:00:25Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > But that’s not all. I’d also like you to pass this on, if you don’t mind. A friend has posted this to her Facebook and I’ve put it on my Instagram, but I’m sure there’s many more people we could reach. Locally, it’s going around to all my loved one’s church’s, and for myself, the place where I volunteer. Then it’s being shared again with their friends and so on and so on. Hell, I’d be thrilled if I have to rent a PO box to handle all the mail. Just every last bit will be a blessing. I hope to you all as well. > [@John\_Mace](#): > > PM me the address. I’ll be glad to do what I can. Best wishes. Some practical advice: Get a post office box for this purpose. I don’t think it’s wise to have your home address being sent around to whomever. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/7 "2015-10-15T02:02:41Z")
Thank you all so much. PMs going out. And **John** , every last bit of our income is about to be spent on nursing home care. I’m just going to have to take my chances and hope that no one will come to my trailer park to stalk my middle aged hiney or steal our wrecked truck. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/8 "2015-10-15T02:24:04Z")
Send me a PM, I’ll send a card! ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/9 "2015-10-15T02:44:03Z")
Done. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/10 "2015-10-15T02:51:38Z")
Sent ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/11 "2015-10-15T03:18:35Z")
I just had a wonderful question… is it okay to share my address / information elsewhere to get more people to send cards, etc.? The answer is a resounding YES! The more, the better. 🙂 And at this point, I think I’ve caught up on all the PMs. If I’ve missed anyone, please post here and I’ll get right on that. Again, thank you everyone. This is why I love this place. ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/12 "2015-10-15T03:32:28Z")
Please PM me 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/13 "2015-10-15T03:44:42Z")
I’d love to send a card. Please PM me. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/14 "2015-10-15T03:58:49Z")
PM me, too. Sending thoughts of strength and peace your way. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/15 "2015-10-15T04:13:09Z")
On the way. And as a side benefit, this really heartens me. I know the journey ahead will be hell, but I’m glad to experience such a show of solidarity and support. ---
**Author:** ![Clothilde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Clothilde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothilde)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/16 "2015-10-15T04:15:29Z")
Please PM me as well. ---
**Author:** ![JoseB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/joseb/32/1530_2.png) [@JoseB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoseB)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/17 "2015-10-15T06:42:47Z")
PM me, please. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/18 "2015-10-15T10:34:23Z")
Damn, faithfool, you didn’t even ask for money. Your husband is lucky to have you! ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/19 "2015-10-15T10:41:06Z")
PM me too, please. He won’t get prayers (I’m an atheist) and he won’t get advice for woo medicine either. I also promise not to try to get him into an Amway presentation! But I’m happy to say g’day and wish him all the best! Oh, and maybe a corny joke thrown in for good measure. ---
**Author:** ![bobkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c67d28/32.png) [@bobkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobkitty)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2015, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682/20 "2015-10-15T12:00:53Z")
One to me as well, please! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/support-for-my-husband-rip-condolences-ed-itd/734682.md?page=2)