# SURPRISE! It's bin Ladin! **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [October 29, 2004, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941 "2004-10-29T23:27:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/1 "2004-10-29T23:27:40Z")
Well, here it is, folks. You’ve been waiting for it: [http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=514&u=/ap/20041029/ap\_on\_re\_mi\_ea/bin\_laden\_tape\_16](http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=514&u=/ap/20041029/ap_on_re_mi_ea/bin_laden_tape_16) ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/2 "2004-10-29T23:29:12Z")
I think there may already be a topic about this. I’m not sure. Anyway, can’t say I’m surprised. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2004, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/3 "2004-10-29T23:35:50Z")
Why is Osama _still_ alive? He’s lookin good! ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2004, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/4 "2004-10-30T00:33:46Z")
> [@](#): > > Bin Laden suggested Bush was slow to react to the Sept. 11 attacks, giving the hijackers more time than they expected. and > [@](#): > > Bin Laden also said the Bush administration was like repressive Arab regimes and > [@](#): > > "He passed on tyranny and oppression to his son, and they called it the Patriot Act, under the pretext of fighting terror. Well. I guess t’s pretty clear whom we should vote for now. Kerry couldn’t have gotten a better backhanded endorsement if he’d paid fnord it himself. ---
**Author:** ![ITR\_champion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c67d28/32.png) [@ITR\_champion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ITR_champion)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2004, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/5 "2004-10-30T00:58:57Z")
Since I’m a lazy bastard, could you go ahead and post the part where he gives an “endorsement” to Kerry? ---
**Author:** ![Apos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/838e76/32.png) [@Apos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apos)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2004, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/6 "2004-10-30T01:19:43Z")
In George Bush’s universe, millions can’t get health care, except for Osama, who’s tanned, healed, and well rested, and still out there. Advantage? Kerry. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2004, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/7 "2004-10-30T03:17:22Z")
If this was a cop movie, this would be the point in the script where the chief called the detective into his office: Chief: George, we’ve got to talk. I know you’ve been looking hard for the Mad Bomber, but I’ve been getting pressure from downtown. They say you let taking down the Saddam operation get too personal and it’s affecting everything you do. George: Of course it’s personal. You know what that bastard Saddam did to my Dad back when he was on the force. From the day I became a cop I’ve sworn I was going to take him down. Chief: George, we’ll be lucky to make the Saddam case. His lawyers have been all over the press, claiming you broke every rule in the book to arrest him and planted the evidence. The IG’s office has been asking a lot of questions. George: Dammit Chief, a good cop’s got to follow his instincts. I know there’s a connection between Saddam’s outfit and the Mad Bomber. And when I find it I’ll blow this case wide open. Chief: I’m sorry George, but since we got this new videotape from the Mad Bomber, I have no choice. I’m taking you and Cheney off the case and putting Kerry and Edwards on it. George: Not those two rookies! Chief, you can’t do it! Just give me one more chance - if I haven’t solved this case and put the bin Laden behind bars within 35,232 hours, you can take me off the case and give it to someone else. ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2004, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/8 "2004-10-30T16:52:51Z")
And if this was real life, it’d be the point where George gets fired for gross incompetence and another cop is put on the case. But we’re living in the world of GOP election-year shenanagans, which means odds are good we’ll get to watch George W. Fife fumble around for another four years… ---
**Author:** ![Rashak\_Mani](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@Rashak\_Mani](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rashak_Mani)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2004, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/9 "2004-10-30T17:42:42Z")
Great Story Nemo ! You just forgot the part where the rogue cop says: “We don’t want the Feds (U.N.) taking this case from us… we’re going in ourselves and without a warrant !” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2004, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/10 "2004-10-30T17:49:09Z")
What would Jim Chee do? ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2004, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/11 "2004-10-31T01:02:50Z")
What would Brian Boitano do? ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2004, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/12 "2004-11-02T00:51:13Z")
> [@ITR champion](#): > > Since I’m a lazy bastard, could you go ahead and post the part where he gives an “endorsement” to Kerry? 😃 OK, you got me. On the _surface_ it looks like BinLaden is merely discrediting Bush to the people of Earth, and that he thinks we need a different president (Kerry is the only viable alternative at this point, ergo endorsement), Kerry. But he knows we don’t trust him, and he’s counting on us picking up on this subtle endorsement of Kerry, so we clearly can not pick Kerry. But he’s a terrorist. And terrorists are used to thinking several levels into the opposition, which means that he would _know_ we suspected such a counterintuitively subtle endorsement of Bush, so we clearly can not pick Bush…! ---
**Author:** ![Ale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Ale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ale)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2004, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/13 "2004-11-02T01:30:37Z")
> [@Inigo Montoya](#): > > 😃 OK, you got me. On the _surface_ it looks like BinLaden is merely discrediting Bush to the people of Earth, and that he thinks we need a different president (Kerry is the only viable alternative at this point, ergo endorsement), Kerry. > > But he knows we don’t trust him, and he’s counting on us picking up on this subtle endorsement of Kerry, so we clearly can not pick Kerry. > > But he’s a terrorist. And terrorists are used to thinking several levels into the opposition, which means that he would _know_ we suspected such a counterintuitively subtle endorsement of Bush, so we clearly can not pick Bush…! Holy crap!, that means that Osama is a… \*_Sicilian_??? :eek: Back on topic, I guess ObL is doing what he does best stirring the pot, spreading chaos and confusion among it´s targets population; this is terrorism on a different level than flying planes into buildings. ---
**Author:** ![spingears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@spingears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spingears)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2004, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surprise-its-bin-ladin/271941/14 "2004-11-02T16:52:24Z")
> [@Squink](#): > > Why is Osama _still_ alive? > He’s lookin good! At least when compared with Arafat!