# Surreal Pussy Loser **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 7, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964 "2009-06-07T00:28:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/21 "2009-06-07T03:15:21Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > I don’t see how calling the police… Of course you don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/22 "2009-06-07T03:15:54Z")
> [@TWDuke](#): > > \>“You never had a cat!” Then why’d she have the bowl, Duke? Why’d she have the bowl? ---
**Author:** ![Jeff\_Lichtman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jeff_lichtman/32/1531_2.png) [@Jeff\_Lichtman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeff_Lichtman)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/23 "2009-06-07T03:25:36Z")
I would not bring your cat out for her to see. What if she insists at that point that it really is her cat? What if she tries to grab your cat? If I were in your position and she approached me again with the same claim, I would tell her very firmly that not only am I certain I don’t have her cat, but that I have already told her this several times, and that I don’t want her to bother me again. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/24 "2009-06-07T03:42:07Z")
**Crazyhorse** seems to have assessed the situation well, however that does sound really bizarre. And I admit I probably wouldn’t have clicked on this thread if it didn’t have “pussy” in the title, so you hooked me in. In one sense I’m glad for it, but in another sense I still shake my fist at you. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/25 "2009-06-07T03:46:47Z")
> [@Sailboat](#): > > Say what? We’ve never taken hers in before. We took OURS in in December because he was unattended, freezing, and starving, and we asked around the neightborhood for several weeks before making the decision and again afterward to make sure no one claimed him. Sorry. I misunderstood what you’d said. ---
**Author:** ![rolandgunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cdc98d/32.png) [@rolandgunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rolandgunslinger)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/26 "2009-06-07T04:11:22Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > **Crazyhorse** seems to have assessed the situation well, however that does sound really bizarre. And I admit I probably wouldn’t have clicked on this thread if it didn’t have “pussy” in the title, so you hooked me in. In one sense I’m glad for it, but in another sense I still shake my fist at you. Fucking “Bait and switch” if I ever seen one.😃 ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/27 "2009-06-07T05:09:20Z")
Another vote for showing her the cat up close. Even if the cat looks a lot like hers, she will be convinced by how the cat will treat her as a stranger. Also, white cats with black mustaches and ears may look unique, so it’s understandable that your turban lady thinks that your cat must be \*her \*cat. But that color pattern happens often enough for such cats to have their own site: [Kitler, cats that look like Hitler.](http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/cgi-bin/seigmiaow.pl) You might show her that site. And be gentle on her when she becomes terribly embarrased after that. Fot many people, cats are loved just as much as children. That doesn’t make her weird, well, weird to you perhaps. But I think she just misses her cat terribly and is clutching at straws to get it back. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/28 "2009-06-07T06:56:13Z")
Another vote for showing her the cat up close. I was wondering why you hadn’t done that the entire time I was reading the OP. If she continues to bug you AFTER you’ve proven it isn’t her cat, THEN you’ll know she’s some sort of mental case. As for now, I agree with **Diogenes** in that she probably believes it is her cat based on viewing it at a distance through a window. Just be sure when you do that you have a good hold on your cat and that your wife is there (as extra help, just in case) so the woman can’t grab it and run off if she still thinks it’s hers. ---
**Author:** ![EvilTOJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee59a6/32.png) [@EvilTOJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EvilTOJ)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/29 "2009-06-07T07:31:43Z")
If you’d misspelled ‘lose’ as ‘loose’ like people like to do nowadays it’d have been the one time I wouldn’t have been irritated by that mistake. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/30 "2009-06-07T07:57:11Z")
> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#): > > It sounds to me like there is a very remote possibility that you may have “her cat” and that your cat is getting some meow mix on the side. Is your cat overweight? Heh, reminds me of a story Terry Pratchett liked to tell about a cat in his neighbourhood that commuted between no less than three food bowls. All three families were convinced it was their cat. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/31 "2009-06-07T08:06:31Z")
There’s a wee chance that she might be a loon; there’s a wee chance that “her” cat may be yours too; there’s a stronger chance that it’s a misunderstanding. There’s nothing worse than having a shitty relationship with your neighbors, so it’s worth taking a punt to show her the cat up close. If she’s a loon then you won’t have made matters worse. And at the same time you could also ask about the turban - please do, coz I’m curious, as Sikh or Hindu women don’t normally wear them. Is she south Asian or is she a cult member? (I cannot imagine how much fun it must be to live in **Rand Rover** ’s neighborhood. Where on earth did you get your social values, **Rand**?) ---
**Author:** ![Chez\_Guevara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/aeb1de/32.png) [@Chez\_Guevara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chez_Guevara)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/32 "2009-06-07T12:37:08Z")
> [@Jeff\_Lichtman](#): > > I would not bring your cat out for her to see. What if she insists at that point that it really is her cat? What if she tries to grab your cat? Clearly, bringing out the cat is a dangerous stratagem for the very reason you describe. The OP should take some photos of his cat and bring those out instead. Full face, profile, and rear view should suffice. (I can recognise my cat from its arse because this feature is slightly deformed.) I’d also have the cat reading today’s paper just to prove the photos are recent. Also, has he thought about putting his cat in a lineup, like the police do? It’s easy. He just needs to get hold of six fairly similar looking stray cats, put his in with them and shuffle them around a bit. Then let the woman try and pick out the one she thinks is hers. With any luck she’ll select one of the others and the problem will be solved. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/33 "2009-06-07T13:30:58Z")
> [@Chez\_Guevara](#): > > Also, has he thought about putting his cat in a lineup, like the police do? It’s easy. He just needs to get hold of six fairly similar looking stray cats, put his in with them and shuffle them around a bit. Then let the woman try and pick out the one she thinks is hers. \ Gimme the Meow Mix, you fuckin’ cocksucker. _sigh_ \ ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/34 "2009-06-07T13:53:02Z")
If she really believes the OP has her cat, why does _she_ not call the police? Surely negotiating the return of stolen property is one of their remits. I don’t see why the burden is on the OP to straighten this out when she has other avenues. If the police knock on the door, invite _them_ to compare meatkitty with posterkitty. I wouldn’t trust the woman not to snatch it and run, leaving bits of her disguise behind. It might be fun to visit her in disguise a few times, asking her to return your puppy. Put her on the other end of surreal phantom petnapping. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/35 "2009-06-07T14:17:59Z")
> [@Maastricht](#): > > Another vote for showing her the cat up close. Even if the cat looks a lot like hers, she will be convinced by how the cat will treat her as a stranger. > > Also, white cats with black mustaches and ears may look unique, so it’s understandable that your turban lady thinks that your cat must be \*her \*cat. But that color pattern happens often enough for such cats to have their own site: [Kitler, cats that look like Hitler.](http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/cgi-bin/seigmiaow.pl) You might show her that site. And be gentle on her when she becomes terribly embarrased after that. > Fot many people, cats are loved just as much as children. That doesn’t make her weird, well, weird to you perhaps. But I think she just misses her cat terribly and is clutching at straws to get it back. I’m gonna guess you just made this post to post the link, but the OP mentioned that the neighbors cat DID NOT have a moustache. Also, to update my point, I’d accost her on the street, cat and picture of her cat in hand (or wait until she comes back) and show her the difference between the two, if she doesn’t accept it then say “Look, this is my cat, if you have a problem with that, call the police, otherwise please leave me alone” And like I said before, I might call the police myself to come settle the situation. At the VERY least they’ll be a report on file and if your cat disappears, the cops will know exactly where to start. ---
**Author:** ![tarragon918](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d26b3c/32.png) [@tarragon918](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tarragon918)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/36 "2009-06-07T14:37:22Z")
Re the turban: she could be part of the religious group 3HO (Healthy, Happy, Holy organization), which follows the Sikh path [3HO’s website here](http://www.3ho.org). Women in that organization do indeed wear turbans. Now as for the lady claiming you have her cat, I think she’s a bit off, but it might help to do a show and tell to let her actually see your cat close up. Of course, all bets are off if she still claims it’s her cat. Then she’s just plain crazy. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/37 "2009-06-07T14:53:48Z")
**Surreal Pussy Loser** Surreal thread title. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/38 "2009-06-07T16:19:08Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > I’m gonna guess you just made this post to post the link, but the OP mentioned that the neighbors cat DID NOT have a moustache. Clearly a cheap disguise. What cat wears an Imperial? ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/39 "2009-06-07T16:27:32Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > She thinks you took her cat, and she thinks you’re trying to bullshit her that you didn’t. Well, it appears that he just tried to disguise the cat by painting it a different color and using latex paint kind of makes it obvious. If I were her I would also be suspicious. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/40 "2009-06-07T17:10:10Z")
My mother used to have a turban. It had nothing to do with her religion. It was just, you know, headgear… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964.md?page=3)