# Surreal Pussy Loser **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 7, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964 "2009-06-07T00:28:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/41 "2009-06-07T17:14:24Z")
Yeah, that stuff about religious significance, thats just a turban legend. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/42 "2009-06-07T17:20:00Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > (I cannot imagine how much fun it must be to live in **Rand Rover** ’s neighborhood. Hey, might not be so bad, what with the solid gold streets, the free pony rides to and from the supermarket, the complete lack of unsightly trash cans… ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/43 "2009-06-07T17:25:34Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Yeah, that stuff about religious significance, thats just a turban legend. - takes pre-filled-out warrant from desk drawer \* That’s right, third lamppost from the corner; the rope’s already up. ---
**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/44 "2009-06-07T17:26:07Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > There’s a wee chance that she might be a loon; there’s a wee chance that “her” cat may be yours too; Sure there is. If it’s a teleporting cat. He got his cat five months before hers went missing. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/45 "2009-06-07T18:23:52Z")
> [@Maastricht](#): > > But that color pattern happens often enough for such cats to have their own site: [Kitler, cats that look like Hitler.](http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/cgi-bin/seigmiaow.pl) [This is what happens](http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/cgi-bin/seigboard.pl?3413) when you feed Hitler after midnight. ---
**Author:** ![Dog80](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/6bbea6/32.png) [@Dog80](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dog80)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/46 "2009-06-07T22:06:24Z")
Next time she comes by tell her in a convincing monotone: “This ain’t the cat you are looking for” “You can go about your business” “Move along” ---
**Author:** ![kasuo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8c91f0/32.png) [@kasuo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kasuo)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/47 "2009-06-07T22:23:11Z")
> [@Dog80](#): > > Next time she comes by tell her in a convincing monotone: > “This ain’t the cat you are looking for” > “You can go about your business” > “Move along” Some other suggestions in a non-monotone voice: “I haven’t seen your cat since.. the storm.” “I don’t eat tasty cats. Why won’t you STOP asking me?” “Your cat pleased my elder gods. Please send more.” ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/48 "2009-06-07T22:53:54Z")
I think the OP shouldn’t have to show this woman the cat. Instead, I’d go to the OP’s vet and get copies of whatever paperwork has been made, when the cat got exams. The dates should convince this person who’s searching for her cat. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2009, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/49 "2009-06-07T23:01:31Z")
> [@Dog80](#): > > Next time she comes by tell her in a convincing monotone: > “This ain’t the cat you are looking for” > “You can go about your business” > “Move along” Don’t forget the sweeping wave of your hand as you say this. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/50 "2009-06-08T00:59:05Z")
> [@Maastricht](#): > > Another vote for showing her the cat up close. Even if the cat looks a lot like hers, she will be convinced by how the cat will treat her as a stranger. Like that would prove anything. I had a cat for 12 years, and it always treated me like a stranger. ---
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/51 "2009-06-08T03:30:52Z")
> [@Chez\_Guevara](#): > > …putting his cat in a lineup, like the police do? It’s easy. He just needs to get hold of six fairly similar looking stray cats, put his in with them and shuffle them around a bit. Easy?! Six stray cats – _check_ Commercial disinfectant – _check_ Chainmail gloves… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/52 "2009-06-08T04:11:49Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > Like that would prove anything. I had a cat for 12 years, and it always treated me like a stranger. But you _are_ a stranger. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/53 "2009-06-08T04:29:13Z")
On my parents’ street, there was a house a few doors down that had two cats, and the junior cat, who seemed to resent his status at home, would come and stay at my parents’ house for days at a time, without the owners’ knowledge. My parents had no other pets at the time, and my mother caters assiduously to any animals that happen along. My parents didn’t know the cat’s owners until later, and apparently there was at least one occasion where, after a snowstorm, the cat’s owners were searching through the forest below the houses for their cat, while he sat comfortable and warm in my parents’ living room. They later learned who those people were, and they were terribly embarrassed, but they did not let on that they were the people with whom the cat was cuckolding its owners. Eventually the senior cat in the other household died, and the junior cat largely stopped coming around once he’d succeeded to domestic primacy. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/54 "2009-06-08T05:06:26Z")
> [@Maastricht](#): > > Another vote for showing her the cat up close. Even if the cat looks a lot like hers, she will be convinced by how the cat will treat her as a stranger. > > Also, white cats with black mustaches and ears may look unique, so it’s understandable that your turban lady thinks that your cat must be \*her \*cat. But that color pattern happens often enough for such cats to have their own site: [Kitler, cats that look like Hitler.](http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/cgi-bin/seigmiaow.pl) You might show her that site. And be gentle on her when she becomes terribly embarrased after that. > Fot many people, cats are loved just as much as children. That doesn’t make her weird, well, weird to you perhaps. But I think she just misses her cat terribly and is clutching at straws to get it back. [hijack]You make my whole weekend with the _Cats that Look Like Hitler_ website. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/55 "2009-06-08T15:26:27Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > Like that would prove anything. I had a cat for 12 years, and it always treated me like a stranger. Well, whaddya expect, the cat liked billionaire lawyer Lance Hunt. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/56 "2009-06-08T15:35:30Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > On my parents’ street, there was a house a few doors down that had two cats, and the junior cat, who seemed to resent his status at home, would come and stay at my parents’ house for days at a time, without the owners’ knowledge. My parents had no other pets at the time, and my mother caters assiduously to any animals that happen along. > > My parents didn’t know the cat’s owners until later, and apparently there was at least one occasion where, after a snowstorm, the cat’s owners were searching through the forest below the houses for their cat, while he sat comfortable and warm in my parents’ living room. They later learned who those people were, and they were terribly embarrassed, but they did not let on that they were the people with whom the cat was cuckolding its owners. > > Eventually the senior cat in the other household died, and the junior cat largely stopped coming around once he’d succeeded to domestic primacy. We had an experience something like this. We had neighbours who left suddenly, leaving their cat behind (an interesting story - guy was living a double life and had a family on the side; his wife found out). The new neigbours did not want the cat and it was essentially abandoned in winter. We knew the cat, liked it, and took in in ourselves. It got along with our cat well enough, but it evidently did not like playing second fiddle to our cat … it started this campaign to be taken in by the catless people living across the street. It would stalk them, follow them around, dart into their door, etc. Eventually they came to my wife, very embarrased, saying that the cat seems to want to live with them - did we mind? We did not; we liked the cat well enough but we had basically taken it in to save its life during the winter, rather than taking it to the Humane Society. The cat happily moved in across the street, in effect choosing its owners. ---
**Author:** ![Pazu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pazu/32/15522_2.png) [@Pazu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pazu)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/57 "2009-06-08T16:31:49Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Yeah, that stuff about religious significance, thats just a turban legend. No, they just keep it under wraps. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/58 "2009-06-08T16:36:10Z")
So… are you going to show her your pussy or what? ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/59 "2009-06-08T16:57:08Z")
> [@Pazu](#): > > No, they just keep it under wraps. They only wear it when they want to go back into the fold. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/60 "2009-06-08T17:29:53Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > This is ridiculous. The OP has done everything that should be expected of him. This woman is a loon, and there’s no reason the OP needs to cater to her. If she comes back, the OP should call the police. Prick. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964.md?page=4)