# Surreal Pussy Loser **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 7, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964 "2009-06-07T00:28:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/61 "2009-06-08T17:32:50Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > Exactamundo. This is why you don’t cater to a crazy person. If that’s the case, how is it that you’re still allowed to post here? ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/62 "2009-06-08T17:34:14Z")
> [@Rand\_Rover](#): > > If the woman comes back, she will be harrassing the OP. That is a problem that is best handled by the police. I don’t see how calling the police to handle a problem best handled by the police makes one a dickhead, but YMMV (possibly because you are just as stupid as all hell). Prick. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/63 "2009-06-08T18:19:02Z")
At his income level, thats “Mr. Penis” to you. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/64 "2009-06-08T18:28:55Z")
Sir Penis, Esq. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2009, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/65 "2009-06-08T18:34:55Z")
> [@Chez\_Guevara](#): > > Also, has he thought about putting his cat in a lineup, like the police do? It’s easy. He just needs to get hold of six fairly similar looking stray cats, put his in with them and shuffle them around a bit. Then let the woman try and pick out the one she thinks is hers. That’d be a fe-lineup. ---
**Author:** ![Mapache](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/58956e/32.png) [@Mapache](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mapache)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/66 "2009-06-09T00:28:31Z")
> [@Nava](#): > > My mother used to have a turban. It had nothing to do with her religion. It was just, you know, headgear… Eyegore: “You take the cat, I´ll take the one in the turban…” ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/67 "2009-06-09T02:06:01Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > Prick. Meh, I’ve been called worse by better. ---
**Author:** ![drpepper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8baadc/32.png) [@drpepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drpepper)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/68 "2009-06-09T02:40:28Z")
> [@Contrapuntal](#): > > Sure there is. If it’s a teleporting cat. You say this as if it’s out of the realm of possibility. ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/69 "2009-06-09T03:48:29Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > Prick. I’m not sure what’s so prickish about what Rand Rover said in your quoted post. The woman has been to the OP’s door twice asking if his cat was hers. That’s bad enough. If she shows up a third time, I would feel harassed, and I would consider calling the police. Does that make me a prick too? How many times does a neighbor have to come do you door, asking the same question, before you get annoyed and tell her you’re going to take action to make it stop? Not to mention that I’d be worried that she was going to try to get the cat somehow, or engage in some other form of harassment, if she really believed I had stolen her cat, as would seem to be the case if she came to my house THREE TIMES asking the same accusatory question. I think your dislike of Rand Rover is clouding your judgment here a little. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/70 "2009-06-09T04:47:43Z")
As for myself, I’m wondering why **Sailboat** didn’t just show her his cat up close, or at least close enough for her to get a good look…maybe even through the window? He also mentions several times that he’s had his cat longer than she says hers has been missing. Why keep pointing that out if his cat is so clearly not hers anyway? I’m also wondering where he’s been lately and why he hasn’t updated us or responded to the numerous suggestions we’ve posted as to how he might handle the situation. Maybe he really does have her cat (or at least thinks he might, and therefore doesn’t want to look too closely himself). It gets curiouser and curiouser. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/71 "2009-06-09T04:59:27Z")
> [@Starving\_Artist](#): > > As for myself, I’m wondering why **Sailboat** didn’t just show her his cat up close, or at least close enough for her to get a good look…maybe even through the window? He also mentions several times that he’s had his cat longer than she says hers has been missing. Why keep pointing that out if his cat is so clearly not hers anyway? > > I’m also wondering where he’s been lately and why he hasn’t updated us or responded to the numerous suggestions we’ve posted as to how he might handle the situation. > > Maybe he really does have her cat (or at least thinks he might, and therefore doesn’t want to look too closely himself). It gets curiouser and curiouser. I don’t see what’s so weird about saying that he’s had his cat longer than she’s lost hers. Isn’t that just another way of proving that it’s his cat, since the two cats do look somewhat similar? And she is able to see it through the window, isn’t she? Based on what he’s said, I don’t see any reason to think he has this neighbor woman’s cat. ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/72 "2009-06-09T05:28:01Z")
I could be wrong of course, but it sounds like even though she’s seen the cat through the window it was still at some distance, like she’d only seen it from the street or something. And again, if the cat is so clearly marked differently why does it matter that he’s had his cat longer than she’s been looking for hers? There would be no need for that further proof. It makes him sound like he’s not all that convinced himself and is using the time differential to bolster his own belief that the cat is not hers. (And to me it’s possible that she’s simply mistaken as to when her cat was finally lost for good, or perhaps she listed him as having been lost more recently thinking that it might cause people to respond with a little more urgency. Who knows? But to me the time discrepancy just isn’t enough to settle the issue definitively. And then to me the most obvious question of all is why didn’t he simply go get the cat and show it to her up close and settle the matter once and for all? If he’d done that and she kept coming back, then yeah, she could be unbalanced. But as it stands, she’s seems unconvinced and determined to try to find out for sure if the cat is hers, and he seems curiously unwilling to settle the matter in the most logical and definitive way. ---
**Author:** ![Daithi\_Lacha](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/daithi_lacha/32/5430_2.png) [@Daithi\_Lacha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daithi_Lacha)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/73 "2009-06-09T12:22:48Z")
> [@Starving\_Artist](#): > > And then to me the most obvious question of all is why didn’t he simply go get the cat and show it to her up close and settle the matter once and for all? If he’d done that and she kept coming back, then yeah, she could be unbalanced. But as it stands, she’s seems unconvinced and determined to try to find out for sure if the cat is hers, and he seems curiously unwilling to settle the matter in the most logical and definitive way. It might depend on the cat. I know that if someone knocked on our door, the only way I’d be able to show them any of our cats would be by leading them into our bedroom and inviting them to lie on the floor and peer under the bed. Either that or dragging a cat out from under the bed, scruffing it severely, toting the frightened beast to the front door and subjecting it to inspection by a stranger. Hopefully, I would have clipped their claws recently. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/74 "2009-06-09T13:00:56Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > “You’ve been seeing other _owners_? After I loved and sheltered and brought you in from the cold? How could you!” \ Cats don’t have owners. They have _staff_. > [@Malthus](#): > > We had neighbours who left suddenly, leaving their cat behind (an interesting story - guy was living a double life and had a family on the side; his wife found out). So he had some pussy on the side? Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/75 "2009-06-09T13:04:41Z")
As other have noted in one way or another. Get to her to bring you a GOOD picture of HER cat. Show her YOUR cat. If she is a reasonable person that will end it. If she is a loon, you are no worse off than before. And AFTER that if she exhibits loon behavior, then give the warning that cops will be involved soon if it doesnt come to an end. You TELLING her it aint her cat, that you had it before she lost her’s, and that it doesnt look like her’s doesnt mean a thing to her. And, why should it? Does she have some magical powers to KNOW that you are telling the truth? The telling proves nothing except perhaps that if you are a cat thief, you can lie as well, which isn’t particularly helpful to her. For all you know, she is a reasonable person, and thinks YOU are the loon who stole her cat and is now lieing to her about it. This aint that complicated. Of course ignore all the above if she can actually see the cat quite well through the window or you have actually shown her the cat. ---
**Author:** ![Kiber](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kiber/32/317_2.png) [@Kiber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiber)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/76 "2009-06-09T15:06:30Z")
I’d make up some fliers and post them around the neighborhood with a picture of your cat and a caption saying “Not Lost Cat”. That should clear everything up. ---
**Author:** ![Frustrated\_Wonderer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a4c791/32.png) [@Frustrated\_Wonderer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frustrated_Wonderer)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/77 "2009-06-09T16:00:47Z")
Just tell her that after repeated attempts, you give in. Tell her you took her cat, changed its look around and will NOT give it back, then see what happens. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/78 "2009-06-09T16:06:09Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > …So he had some pussy on the side?.. Christ, when did they move it? ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/79 "2009-06-09T16:20:44Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Christ, when did they move it? Hell, I am still trying to deal with when they turned it sideways 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2009, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964/80 "2009-06-09T16:41:34Z")
Another vote for “show her the cat,” preferably in conjunction with one of her flyers so that you can point out the differences in features. If you’re concerned about a cat snatch (snicker, “snatch”), have someone else you trust there with you, or show her through a screen/glass door. As has been observed, from her perspective, if you’d already stolen her cat, why \*wouldn’t \*you lie about it? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/surreal-pussy-loser/498964.md?page=5)